Allergies, Babysitter Kids Demon child

Demon child

PeanutlyDisabled - - France

Today, I was babysitting a new child. I guess she heard me tell her parents about my severe peanut allergy because she got a jar out of the pantry, spread it all over the stairs leading to where her fort was, and walked around with a baseball bat covered in it so I couldn't come near her. FML

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The rhythm of the fight
Discover all the best anecdotes from the month of January, with or without snow, with or without you. …

Hard no

badsitter -

Today, my mother stopped speaking to me because I won’t let her babysit anymore. Her idea of babysitting is to sit my daughter alone with a tablet and a pile of sugary junk food for 7 hours straight. FML

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justsomesummer - 26/01/2016 18:09 - United States - Beaverton

Today, I got a new babysitting job. Every time the little girl goes to the bathroom, she screams and cries until I wipe her. She's 7 years old. FML

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SPIDERS!

Anonymous - - United States

Today, while cleaning out my garage, I found a pregnant spider. I couldn't step on the spider without releasing the baby spiders, so I went inside to get a glass jar to trap it. While trying to relocate the spider, I accidentally stepped on it. I now have a bunch of baby spiders roaming around. FML

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Quick learner

BubbaCat - 24/04/2023 10:00

Today, I've been babysitting a 4 month-old for two days. This has made a great impression on my cat, because now I can't sit down without him jumping up and licking my face until I pat his butt and rock him like the baby. FML

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Judgemental

ugly - - United States

Today, my sister told me not to come over anymore because her baby is scared of my face. FML

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Self defence

Anonymous - - United States

Today, I went to my grandmother's house to pick up her cat to take him to the vet. She forgot who I was and sprayed me in the face with pepper spray. FML

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Creeped out

NotASpiderMan - - United States - Seattle

Today, as I was changing my sheets, I found a huge spider under my pillow. My 10 year-old sister had to get rid of it for me. FML

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Sticky boi

emonsteadman - - United States - Denton

Today, at my job as a lifeguard, I told a teenager to, "Walk please." He then threw his soda at me as he ran away. We aren't allowed off stand unless it's an emergency, so I baked in that soda for 30 minutes. FML

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No good deed…

williebees - - United States - Huntsville

Today, as I was about to walk across the street, a girl in front of me who clearly wasn't paying attention to the traffic, almost got run over. I grabbed her arm and jumped back. She was fine. I fell and fractured my arm and wrist. FML

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Devious

rachel - - Germany - Köln

Today, my little brother told me to give him my phone so he could play a game on it. I said no, because I was taking a call from a friend at the time. He then walked over to the wall, headbutted it, burst into tears, then told my parents that I punched him. They believed him. FML

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martin4770 0

Friday 8 January 2010 15:53

#1 I wouldn't go back

GoddessDigi 12

Friday 8 January 2010 15:56

..And this is the reason my husband may interact with our child, but not actually TEACH her anything. He'd do this, I know he would. FYL, she's too smart.

diamondpilot 0

Wednesday 1 December 2010 18:06

Did anybody besides me even consider the fact that it could be peanut OIL? OP never specified what was in the jar, so most people would just assume it was peanut butter, which would take quite some time to spread on stairs. But if it was peanut oil, it would only take a matter of seconds for the child to pour it over the stairs.

mazesm 11

Thursday 31 March 2011 0:13

You could get some shoes on and some plastic bags, put the bass over your shoes. Problem solved. For the bat, grab a pillow and protect yourself. Both problems solved, I'm 12. ;)