Health, Healthy Lifestyle Coffee Addiction - FML

Addiction

Anonymous - 18/01/2022 01:58

Today, I thought I’d do something for my digestion and forego the after-lunch coffee, as it always makes me gassy. Well, without the coffee apparently all the gas just stayed inside. Whatever it did in there gave me a pretty awful stomach ache. FML

883

149

The rhythm of the fight
Discover all the best anecdotes from the month of January, with or without snow, with or without you. …

Gummied up

Anonymous - 01/05/2024 15:00 - United States

Today, I ate one Benefiber gummy and spent half the day and good chunk of the night in misery with an upset stomach, where it felt like a lump was in it, as well as aggressive and painful gas, and painful diarrhea. FML

349

119

Inside out?

Anonymous - 09/11/2023 21:00

Today, I’ve been having the worst gas, nausea, and stomach pain of my life and literally nothing I do works. While I was at work, I farted but it came from the inside out; it was so loud there’s no way everyone didn’t hear it. My stomach started bubbling so loud, the guy sitting behind me got up and walked away. FML

449

154

eminem blows cock - 15/06/2012 16:41 - Ireland - Kilflynn

Today, after having stayed up all night studying, all the coffee I'd drank to keep me awake hit my gut with a vengeance. I ended up missing two exams because I was emptying my bowels into the toilet all morning. FML

22 306

9 758

Loose Goose - 24/10/2018 12:00

Today, I went on a coffee date. It turned out to be a mistake - not because he was bad, but because I forgot how much coffee upsets my stomach. Yup, it makes me need to poop, and I did. In my jeans. As he drove me home. Not quite the "run" of fun we’d planned. FML

2 739

739

Anonymous - 24/07/2019 20:00

Today, I've had bad gas all day. In bed, almost asleep, I felt the urge to fart, and thinking nothing of it, I let it rip. It wasn't a fart. FML

1 551

441

Nice imagery, dude

Anonymous - 30/04/2022 10:00

Today, I ate something that didn’t agree with me. Now I’m in the bathroom and my butthole is dry heaving. FML

750

128

dead rats - 08/08/2016 13:58

Today, I had a terrible stomach ache and had some pretty bad gas at work. I tried to head down to the basement for a while to allow my coworkers to continue in peace. About an hour after I came back up, my boss called pest control due to the horrible smell that "must be dead rats". FML

13 699

1 320

I can't win

Anonymous - 08/11/2022 02:00

Today, I hate my body. If I eat anything at all, even a piece of fruit, I get terrible stomach cramps, and yet if I go too long without eating, I get gassy diarrhoea. FML

878

114

Dinnertime

u.p.i.c. - 02/08/2019 22:00 - United States - Los Angeles

Today, the smell of my own fart made me feel hungry. FML

1 175

577

Bad day

it hurts!! - 29/05/2023 21:00 - United States

Today, I double checked with the barista to make sure my latte had soy milk. After a few sips, I could tell it wasn’t but it was too late. I’m so sensitive to dairy, I spent the rest of my work day trying to stifle the gut busting cramps and noxious fumes. I had a meeting I couldn’t reschedule. FML

926

169

RichardPencil 30

Tuesday 18 January 2022 5:17

Just drink coffee before bed -- you'll be farting all night. Some guys like that.

Yudith 25

Tuesday 18 January 2022 18:57

That's another way to stay up all night.

RichardPencil 30

Tuesday 18 January 2022 5:17

Just drink coffee before bed -- you'll be farting all night. Some guys like that.

Yudith 25

Tuesday 18 January 2022 18:57

That's another way to stay up all night.

Miscellaneous Stalker My ex Coworkers Love Internet Relatable AITA Pokémon Awkward Work Kids Parenting Annoying Shopping Underwear Jealousy Parents Thief Intimacy Suspicious Sex Family NSFW Birthday Gifts I need your advice Accident Abuse Moving home

Today, after her very first driving lesson, my daughter came home claiming she did really well. Which is suspicious since her instructor was at that moment on the phone with me yelling, saying I must be crazy if I think she’s ever getting in his car again, and that I should explain to her what a bus pass is. FML

520

113

Today, I found out how messed up I am when a guy held a knife to my throat and it turned me on. FML

2 089

471

Today, I found out that I was conceived during a conjugal visit. FML

36 493

3 091

Today, I woke up next to my boss naked. We are both women and she is married. Work should be interesting tomorrow. FML

23 858

48 930

Today, my mom decided to give me a bloodcurdlingly graphic sex talk. On a plane. I'm 23. FML

34 797

2 884

Today, I felt like spicing up our marriage, so I thought I'd surprise my husband when he got home from work. I put on my sexiest teddy, lit some candles, and laid on the bed. He walked in the room, looked at me for a second, farted, then asked me what was for dinner. FML

44 329

4 762