Health, Accident Transportation Acting out

Acting out

itsgotime - 20/03/2009 06:11 - United States

Today, I was running to my car, slipped, and slammed my head on the car door. I started driving to the hospital because it was bleeding profusely and I was dizzy, I called my mom to tell her what had happened. She said I was grounded for "goofing off" and that she was "sick of my shit". FML

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The rhythm of the fight
Discover all the best anecdotes from the month of January, with or without snow, with or without you. …

Funny how?

funnyguyNOT - 05/04/2009 21:39 - United States

Today, a car was waiting for me to cross the street so I thought it would be funny to slowly limp across the street. When I got to the end, I jumped as high as I could to show I was faking. Turns out I tripped and hit my head hard on the sidewalk. That car took me to the hospital. FML

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angel grace - 15/02/2018 15:00

Today, I woke up feeling ill. My mom sent me to school anyway, and grounded me for "lying" about being sick. As soon as I got to school, I began vomiting blood. FML

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Don't know, don't care

Anonymous - 02/09/2024 13:00 - United States - Portland

Today, I was in a car accident. When I came home, I told my mom. She just got angry with me, blamed me for it, and didn't even ask if I was OK. FML

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Less haste, more speed

Ouch - 20/05/2012 04:06 - United States - Costa Mesa

Today, I tried to beat my dad to the car. I jumped over the steel cables in the parking structure and hit my head on a metal pipe, then bounced off the wires, and onto my back on the pavement. Good thing we were already at the hospital to visit my sick mother. FML

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Anonymous - 24/09/2011 04:40 - United States

Today, I received a serious concussion and several stitches to the back of my head. The attacker? My mom. FML

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Help!

katie - 27/01/2010 20:03 - France

Today, after spending a few minutes de-icing my car and leaving the heat on so it would warm up, I slipped as I was entering the car and hit my head on the door, causing it to close and lock. I'm waiting for my mom who has a spare key to come and unlock it. Class started ten minutes ago. FML

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Light sentence

ClumsyTeen - 13/05/2021 23:57 - United States - Staten Island

Today, I tried to sneak in at 2 a.m. after going out, since I'm 16, but I tripped over a pair of slippers and landed flat on my face. My body fell quietly, but I let out a very loud and guttural, "Oof." After about a minute, I lifted my face to see my mom standing over me. I'm now grounded for 3 days. FML

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McSteamy

Anonymous - 07/11/2021 11:00

Today, I illicitly borrowed my dad's car to go to the store, but crashed into my mom's car as she and dad were returning from my grandma's house. Both cars are totalled, my mom is in hospital with a broken collarbone, and I realised dads really can make steam come out their ears if they’re really mad. FML

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Thanks guys

Anonymous - 29/04/2009 00:05 - Canada

Today, I was walking into my living room when I slipped over the carpet, bashed my head on my glass table, and was moaning in pain on the floor. My parents came running when they heard my head bang… straight to the table, to see if there were any scratches on it. FML

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Unbelievable

Anonymous - 15/08/2013 17:39 - Spain - Mon?var

Today, I slipped and fell down the stairs, landing hard on my knee. Through my screams of agony, my mom accused me of exaggerating the pain, and said I was just being an attention seeker, before finally taking me to hospital. I was told my leg was broken. She refused to apologize. FML

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Capybara 0

Friday 20 March 2009 16:10

If this is true, then you really could have endangered a lot of people. What if you had passed out and swerved into a neighbor's yard or something? Still, I agree. Your mom is a bitch.

JohnnyViola 0

Friday 20 March 2009 16:03

What a bitch.

bullrider92 19

Saturday 27 August 2011 19:04

I would give you the benefit of doubt but you should have called 911.

NigeI 1

Tuesday 3 January 2012 7:13

Sounds like something my mom would do too. I feel for ya

sceptic 1

Wednesday 4 January 2012 3:33

Moms don't just say that. It was most likely well deserved! Also, all of you spineless assholes, where do you get off calling someone's mother a bitch???

emba_fml 13

Wednesday 8 February 2012 5:40

YDI for goofing off.

jabs98 1

Tuesday 21 February 2012 0:50

What is wrong with FML people?! They post the stupidest crap ever sometimes. I admit, some are really funny and some are super sad, but really? Do you guys have a family that cares? All i see is put down and parents being jack-asses all the time, that's not how it is!:( Sorry:(