Work

Retail work is hell

By Anonymous - 12/06/2021 21:00 - United Kingdom

Today, a girl threatened to castrate me if I didn’t refund her for a remote control that SHE damaged. FML

I agree, your life sucks 936

You deserved it 72

Serfs

By Impotante - 11/06/2021 02:01

Today, at work while everyone else was at lunch, my boss's sister-in-law called. Realizing I was manning the phones alone, she immediately asked, "Oh, is everyone of importance gone to lunch?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 918

You deserved it 91

Nutshot

By DanJames24 - 10/06/2021 21:01 - United Kingdom

Today, a work colleague was trying to kill a fly that was buzzing around the place. I was about to go on my break, but was stopped because she missed the fly and accidentally whacked me in the balls in the process. By the time I didn’t feel sick anymore, my break was over. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 002

You deserved it 87

Wakey wakey

By fuuuuck - This FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I had a big presentation to do at work, so I got up early and ran myself a bath. I woke up three hours later, extremely late, and still in the bath. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 337

You deserved it 25 219

Entitled

By hate this job - 09/06/2021 19:59

Today, a 300 lb woman caused a huge scene at the public pool where I work. She accused me of fatshaming and swore to sue me for discrimination. I asked her to cover up, as her 3x too small string bikini went against the pool’s dress code. I don’t make the rules, I just have to enforce them. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 215

You deserved it 122

Data engineer struggles

By Jay - 09/06/2021 17:01 - Netherlands - Amsterdam

Today, I told my supervisor that I want to do the work I was hired to do, which is Data Engineer. He told me he doesn't have the workload for another data engineer, and needs someone with people skills. He's very happy with the current situation. I left my previous job because of the same problem. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 028

You deserved it 103

Mask confusion

By clairebear99 - 08/06/2021 08:01

Today, my coworker screamed at me for once again calling her by a different coworker's name. They have the same hair, skin color, and body type, so I honestly don’t know how I’m supposed to tell them apart. FML

I agree, your life sucks 395

You deserved it 1 553

X Æ A-12

By invalid - 07/06/2021 10:59

Today, while applying for jobs, every single application has been giving me the error message, "Name not valid." Sorry the name my parents gave me isn’t good enough. FML

I agree, your life sucks 945

You deserved it 120

Cutting corners

By Anonymous - 07/06/2021 06:01

Today, we can finally order badly needed safety gear for my crew. My boss flipped his shit, demanding that I "stop bringing it up, it's annoying" for doing my damndest to keep up with industry standards. I was brought to tears for literally doing my job, with no "peers" to back me, since I'm an HR department of one. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 286

You deserved it 136

Almost there

By Anonymous - 05/06/2021 19:01 - United Kingdom

Today, I got a better job offer out of the blue, more pay, less work. I informally accepted and handed my notice as legally required. They rescinded the job offer. I'm now unemployed at the end of hiring season. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 040

You deserved it 254

Karen strikes again

By lanadelreylover - 04/06/2021 17:01

Today, I was working at a carnival. I was on the ticket booth, and middle-aged lady came up asking for a refund for $50 worth of tickets she didn’t use. However, there are signs saying I can’t give out refunds. She spent 10 minutes yelling at me to give her a refund. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 196

You deserved it 80

You all sound the same

By kaitlin - 04/06/2021 14:01

Today, I got my first job interview since the pandemic started, with Dollar Tree. The interview was going great, until I accidentally said ,"Dollar General." Safe to say I’m not getting that job. FML

I agree, your life sucks 861

You deserved it 227

Unionize

By Anonymous - 04/06/2021 00:01

Today, my coworker has once again called in and asked me to cover her shift. She does this for every single one of her shifts, and my boss told me that if I don’t cover it, I’ll be fired. I used to have a life, but not anymore. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 216

You deserved it 145

Better Call Saul

By Anonymous - 03/06/2021 14:01

Today, after working for the same company for over 20 years, someone from upper management told me they’d accidentally been overpaying me all these years, not a huge issue, but would I mind giving the money back in one lump sum by the end of the month? UM, WHAT? FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 018

You deserved it 118

Showing

By Anonymous - 02/06/2021 14:01

Today, I recorded a 20-minute TED talk and told my students to watch it on the app in preparation for next terms projects. I got bombarded with messages from my students, telling me that because I was sat down on a chair while recording, certain camera angles could see straight up my skirt. FML

I agree, your life sucks 922

You deserved it 686

Nepotism rules

By Anonymous - 01/06/2021 11:01 - United States - Manchester

Today, I got notice that I didn't get the new position I applied for at work. After two interviews, pay negotiation and paperwork, as well as years of giving this place all my time, I found out my boss gave it to his friend's daughter, who has no experience or credentials needed for the position. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 434

You deserved it 105

Long drive home

By Anonymous - 01/06/2021 04:01 - Australia - Kellyville

Today, at work, I shat myself at my desk thinking it was a fart. I had to waddle down to the parking garage and drive myself home. I’m a grown man. FML

I agree, your life sucks 907

You deserved it 413

Everybody does

By Bill - 30/05/2021 23:59 - Canada - Qu?bec

Today, I’ve been unemployed for 5 months. My last job was for government in Canada and I was harassed by management, and deemed a threat to the building. Why? Someone complained I cough. I’ve been coughing for years. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 007

You deserved it 113

Sorry Danny de Vito…

By Anonymous - 28/05/2021 14:00

Today, I met my celebrity crush in an official capacity, I was completely tongue tied and when I stood to shake her hand, I tripped and fell with my face in her cleavage. She thought it was funny, but I was mortified and my boss suspended me until security footage proves I didn’t do it on purpose. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 203

You deserved it 177

Hey

By Anonymous - 27/05/2021 00:01 - Canada

Today, I decided to step out of my comfort zone and talk to my coworker because people have been saying I’m too shy. I say, "Hey" to a girl and she made fun of my voice. She’s the one who told me to talk more. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 146

You deserved it 97

White collar crime

By potting shed woman - 27/05/2021 04:01

Today, after I told my boss I'd found a serious error that cost the company thousands each year, I found out he'd fled abroad. Turns out the error was him stealing for the past 40 years, our entire department is under investigation and the owner is considering scrapping our office and firing us. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 585

You deserved it 90

Rude!

By geo - 26/05/2021 22:01

Today, I’m a cashier and I put a lady’s change on the counter instead of in her hand. She then hissed at me for being rude. When I explained to her that I have never heard that it’s rude to do that, her response was, "Are you kidding me!? You should have been BORN knowing that!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 274

You deserved it 340

The nerve of some people

By evecharneco - 25/05/2021 14:01 - United States

Today, it's been a few months since got fired from a job I'd spent two years at. Before getting fired, I trained the entire new staff, and to this day they still message me for help, even though I was fired months ago. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 081

You deserved it 120

Happy Birthday

By Anonymous - 24/05/2021 08:01 - South Africa - Johannesburg

Today, it's my birthday. My boss's birthday is 5 days away. Instead of wishing me happy birthday, the staff decided to surprise my boss with an early gift. We also had to take a picture of him with everyone. I work at another branch alone, and had to post the picture to social media. Happy Birthday to me, I guess. FML

I agree, your life sucks 933

You deserved it 112

Safe working conditions

By Anonymous - 22/05/2021 06:01

Today, at work, yet another inappropriately stacked pallet fell on me. I thought for sure that I just hit a nerve. Nope, I fractured my arm. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 029

You deserved it 121

Karen's aquarium

By agrant93 - 21/05/2021 01:02 - United States - Nampa

Today, I got called a racist because I refused to sell a woman a bunch of rather large 4-inch goldfish for a 10-gallon aquarium. These fish get 10 inches long and she wanted 20 of them. Essentially, she screamed at me for a half-hour, asking to speak to my manager. I'm the manager. She called corporate. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 859

You deserved it 133

agrant93 tells us more.

agrant93 6

Saturday 8 May 2021 7:26

To clarify we're both white

Where's my coffee?

By dinkley7 - 20/05/2021 11:00

Today, so far, I’ve been called the c-word, a bitch, and a douche. All by the same person, all because I wouldn't make them coffee at one in the morning. We don’t serve coffee until 6 a.m. FML

I agree, your life sucks 988

You deserved it 107

It's called a calendar

By Anonymous - 19/05/2021 17:31 - India - Mumbai

Today, it was my first day at my first job, I got up early, got ready, waited an hour for HR to call. I called them instead and they didn't answer, so I wrote an email to the partners. It turns out I got the first day date wrong. Some first impression. FML

I agree, your life sucks 758

You deserved it 458

Bad employee

By Anonymous - 18/05/2021 20:01

Today, I ran into my boss when I was at the beach. He told me he was sorry for my loss. I asked him, "What loss?" Then I remembered I’d lied about taking time off under the pretense of bereavement of my grandmother passing away. FML

I agree, your life sucks 206

You deserved it 2 832

Gas wars

By Anonymous - 17/05/2021 15:59 - United States

Today, a co-worker has the office next to mine. The walls are not soundproofed. I can hear him farting loudly throughout the day. He spread a rumor around the office that he can hear me farting all day. Another coworker told me and gave me advice on foods not to eat, that gave people bad gas. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 083

You deserved it 96

FML on Facebook

Keywords

Miscellaneous Stalker My ex Coworkers Love Internet Relatable AITA Pokémon Awkward Work Parenting Kids Annoying Shopping Underwear Jealousy Parents Thief Suspicious Sex Intimacy Family NSFW Birthday Gifts I need your advice Accident Abuse Moving home

The Top

Today, our 16 year-old daughter is still staging a protest because we won’t let her scummy boyfriend move in with us. She’s decided to go on a “bathing strike” until we change our minds. It’s been over 30 days and our house smells like an NFL locker room took a shit in a bus station. FML

I agree, your life sucks 459

You deserved it 94

Today, I didn't see the cat in the bathroom before I took my pants down, and the beast tore open my ballsack. The doctor says I might lose my left testicle, depending on how the surgery goes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 876

You deserved it 363

Today, I had to explain to my dad how I rear-ended the car in front of me because of a particularly intense banjo solo. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 620

You deserved it 19 915

Today, my friend started his first day of work with me. I thought it'd be fun, but he's been putting on an obnoxious fake French accent and saying "merde" whenever anything goes wrong. Half the women at the office want his dick, and I'm still as single as ever. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 435

You deserved it 6 002

Today, my new girlfriend introduced me to her bisexual best friend. I can’t help but find it weird that he helped her fake tan, completely naked, or the time he helped her wax her muff, also completely naked, while she waxed his balls and ass crack. This might be too weird for me to tolerate. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 265

You deserved it 225

Today, it was snowing really badly, so my boss said that everyone who drove to work could leave. But because I got the bus in, she said that I should stay and do a full day. By the time she eventually decided it was bad enough for me to leave, the buses were cancelled. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 088

You deserved it 2 315