Disappointment

Not so spooky

By Hailey - 01/11/2022 10:00

Today, I went out to my first Halloween event in 5 years, only to find out my boyfriend just saw it as an obstacle to playing Pokemon Go. FML

I agree, your life sucks 658

You deserved it 178

Failson

By Anonymous - 17/09/2023 20:00

Today, I gave my son a job as a shelf stacker in one of my stores. He is in his thirties and is so dumb that he has been fired from every other job for incompetence. I don’t want him to starve or lose his flat, but I also couldn’t give him an important job in case he screwed it up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 668

You deserved it 202

Such a disappointment

By Anonymous - 29/05/2022 18:00

Today, my son joined the ranks of an organisation filled with nothing but scum, villains, thieves, and highwaymen. He's now a tax inspector. FML

I agree, your life sucks 451

You deserved it 869

Despair

By TeachingSucks - 17/05/2023 11:00 - United States - Cabot

Today, I'm grading final projects for a junior level college class. A student finally turned in their work, after months of encouragement and coaxing. Half of it was plain wrong, the rest had so many spelling and grammatical mistakes, it appeared to be written by a drunk autocorrect program. FML

I agree, your life sucks 724

You deserved it 123

Casting call out

By Kat - 17/09/2009 02:19 - United States

Today, I was trying out for a play I really wanted to be in. After my audition, I was feeling really good. She said she would post the cast list tomorrow. Not knowing where she would post it, I asked her. Her reply? "It doesn't matter. You won't be on it anyway." FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 347

You deserved it 3 354

Kitchen nightmares

By Anonymous - 19/09/2021 00:30 - Australia - Mypolonga

Today, I dropped my phone in the frying pan whilst cooking my steak. I had to rinse off the oil immediately and clean the phone, then had to eat a cold steak. FML

I agree, your life sucks 295

You deserved it 1 063

No silver linings

By Anonymous - 02/02/2023 02:00 - Norway - Stavanger

Today, I found out that I can no longer work at my dream job because of their financial status. And of course, just now that I was finally beginning to be happy with my life, something like this naturally had to happen. FML

I agree, your life sucks 724

You deserved it 110

Disappointing

By NOT a daddy’s girl - 24/04/2025 00:00 - United States - Riverside

Today, after I tried to be the bigger person and invite my dad to my college graduation/dinner, and he asked when so I gave him the address and times, surprise surprise, he didn’t show up. He didn’t even have the decency to send a damn text. Yet when I’m angry about his crap, I get told I have daddy issues. FML

I agree, your life sucks 481

You deserved it 86

So frustrating!

By Unsuccessful Prankster - 13/06/2023 08:00 - United States - Steele

Today, I got those stickers that say "Voice Activated; Say Loudly: PAPER TOWEL NOW!" I then placed one in a public bathroom and waited in the stall to hear someone yell the phrase. I waited for thirty minutes and heard the machine go off several times, with no shouting at all. In other words, no one fell for it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 100

You deserved it 1 628

You have arrived at your destination

By Anonymous - 30/01/2023 10:00

Today, an Edible Arrangements driver knocked on my door with the most delicious-looking gift! He was just asking for directions. FML

I agree, your life sucks 717

You deserved it 131

With friends like these…

By Anonymous - 28/03/2022 18:00

Today, my best friend promised me that she'd be there after a rough night the night before. Hours later, I did some digging and found out that she went ahead and called another group of friends behind my back, and then told me to stop being a baby when I figured it out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 938

You deserved it 196

Happy ******* birthday

By Anonymous - 31/01/2024 05:00 - United States

Today, I realized that I’ve gone out of my way every year to make everyone around me’s birthday extra special. I can’t remember the last time anyone celebrated or remembered mine. This year my “best friend” scheduled her elective surgery I’m supposed to take her to on my birthday. What a party. FML

I agree, your life sucks 522

You deserved it 133

Disappointing

By Muon66 - 11/06/2021 03:59

Today, I showed my 5-year-old son a photo with a ginger cat and her 6 newborn kittens. I forgot to tell my son the cat mom is not the male ginger cat at home, despite them looking exactly same. His excitement became deep sorrow and a tantrum when he figured out that we didn't get half a dozen kittens. FML

I agree, your life sucks 398

You deserved it 632

A tale as old as time

By Anonymous - 18/12/2023 17:00 - United States - Huntsville

Today, a really cute girl from my class invited me out for a few drinks. I’ve had a crush on her all year and thought this was my chance. We went out but it turns out she has a boyfriend of 5 and a half years she plans to marry. I saw her as a potential girlfriend and I guess she saw me as something else. FML

I agree, your life sucks 377

You deserved it 610

Dead end

By Anonymous - 10/02/2023 11:59

Today, I was talking to a guy I've recently started developing feelings for. We've been talking for a while, but he revealed that he wasn't being serious with anything we've been talking about, and didn't have any feelings for me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 792

You deserved it 150

Chill out, dudebro

By Anonymous - 17/04/2021 20:00

Today, my hair is so long hair that it touches my shoulders now. My father attempted to bribe me into cutting my hair several times. I'm 30. FML

I agree, your life sucks 724

You deserved it 266

Chewed up and spat out

By Anonymous - 26/05/2025 21:00

Today, I retired after 38 years. I went in expecting a proper goodbye, tears, and handshakes. I got none of that; they had me work like normal, then escorted me out after my shift because legally they had to make sure I’d definitely left the building. Not even a retirement card. FML

I agree, your life sucks 692

You deserved it 99

Happily married

By Anonymous - 06/08/2022 22:00 - Australia

Today, I read an FML about a garter toss. It made me remember my own garter toss. None of the guys at the wedding wanted to catch it, and visibly cringed at the idea of touching it. Ten years later, it's all been downhill from there. FML

I agree, your life sucks 826

You deserved it 215

Animal union

By Anonymous - 01/02/2023 10:00 - United States - San Diego

Today, I went to the zoo to see all of my favorite animals. When I got there, I realized they must've all been on strike or something, and refused to come out of their enclosures. FML

I agree, your life sucks 603

You deserved it 289

High hopes

By mywillyisdisappointed - This FML is from back in 2015 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I went out with a girl I've been dating. I dropped her off and she finally asked me if I wanted to come in. When I did, she asked me to change a light bulb in her kitchen, and then promptly sent me home. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 161

You deserved it 3 536

Crybabies

By PooperParty - 05/04/2021 11:00

Today, I had an Easter Egg Hunt in my backyard for my kids. When they collected all the eggs, they opened them and to their dismay there was no candy inside. When I bought them, I thought they already came with candy. It’s been two hours and my kids won’t stop crying. FML

I agree, your life sucks 407

You deserved it 1 837

Congratulations!

By Anonymous - 30/01/2025 15:00 - United States

Today, I spent practically an hour practicing my acceptance speech in front of the mirror after being nominated for "Employee of the Month." It turns out that they were just reading the names alphabetically, and I wasn’t even in the top five. FML

I agree, your life sucks 336

You deserved it 216

Boo!

By Anonymous - 15/04/2022 08:00

Today, I excitedly waited to watch the finale and reunion of The Ultimatum on Netflix. It was the worst thing to ever happen to reality TV, which is really saying something considering all the shit out there. It was the only thing I was looking forward to in months. FML

I agree, your life sucks 302

You deserved it 724

Seems unlikely

By Anonymous - 30/07/2021 22:01 - United States - Brookville

Today, I teasingly asked my crush why he never came to visit me in my dorm. He said that all his friends there had moved out and gotten apartments, so he had no reason to go to my dorm. Oh. I thought we were friends. FML

I agree, your life sucks 859

You deserved it 181

Nice try

By Anonymous - 21/03/2013 20:43 - United Kingdom - Retford

Today, I finally got the courage to tell the girl I like how I really feel about her, due in no small part to how flirty she's been towards me lately. Turns out she's really just a skank and was trying to make my best friend "jealous". He's gay. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 229

You deserved it 4 317

Quickie

By wasntworththedrive - 20/01/2010 06:43 - United States

Today, the guy that I've recently became close to texted me, wanting to hook up. He's very cute and I was definitely interested, so I agreed. The drive to his house lasted longer than the actual sex. He lives less than five minutes away. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 767

You deserved it 4 937

Disappointing

By Anonymous - 01/07/2022 12:00

Today, I bumped into a former teacher, one who spent many many weeks helping me get into university so I could become a psychologist. I had to see the look of disappointment on her face when I told her I got pregnant freshman year, and became a stay at home mom with a part time job at Tesco’s. FML

I agree, your life sucks 397

You deserved it 1 397

Lower your expectations

By mista_sandy - This FML is from back in 2012 but it's good stuff - Canada - Toronto

Today, a guy asked me out and said he was going to take me to a fancy restaurant where they make the food in front of you. I love Japanese food, so I was really excited. We went to Subway. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 107

You deserved it 5 941

Right place, wrong time

By Anonymous - 16/05/2023 18:00

Today, I had an amazing date with an amazing guy, but he hadn't realized he doesn't have time for a relationship, and I don't have the emotional capacity. It's just the wrong time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 614

You deserved it 197

Brutally honest

By thisucks - 28/01/2010 13:59 - Canada

Today, I went out on a date with a guy significantly older than myself. I told him I really liked him because I can have an intelligent conversation with him, unlike most guys my age. He told me he just wanted to get into my pants. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 406

You deserved it 11 027

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The Top

Today, my boyfriend drove me back home. My dad was sitting on the porch in his underwear, with his shotgun in his lap. He stroked the gun, looked my boyfriend dead in the eyes, and slowly shook his head. Now my boyfriend refuses to see me for his own safety. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 195

You deserved it 4 404

Today, my boyfriend and I slept together. In the middle of the night, he saw my phone receiving a text from someone saying, "Hey baby, I missed you so much! I'm going to be visiting in a couple of days, hope to see you again, I love you!" He got mad and left my house. It was my dad in Ohio. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 141

You deserved it 4 919

Today, while working in childcare, we went to a farm so the kids could see how things worked. They started showing off prize winning cattle and when they bought out "Miss Stacey", the kids lost their shit. My name is Miss Stacey. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 318

You deserved it 3 298

Today, my roommate took my car without permission while I was at work. He downshifted to pass someone, but went from 5th to 2nd gear, and practically most of the engine went straight out of the tailpipe. FML

I agree, your life sucks 520

You deserved it 66

Today, my boyfriend said, "I won't marry you, but I want to spend my life with you." When I told him that upset me, he said, "My ex completely changed once we got married, and I like you as you are now." FML

I agree, your life sucks 377

You deserved it 157

Today, my husband decided he would rather rage-wank to my mum's Facebook profile picture than make love to me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 559

You deserved it 5 321