Animals: Today, I woke up, patted my dog and kissed his nose. He was dead....

By Anonymous - 24/01/2011 05:40 - Egypt

Today, I woke up, patted my dog and kissed his nose. He was dead. FML

agreeclassic 76 706

vote type 1 4 341

Christmas: Snowy Joys and Blunders
Enjoy Christmas stories where unexpected gifts and family reunions create lasting memories... and fun! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Similar FMLs

By jrad - 08/09/2010 19:23 - United States

Today, I went to move my dog that had been napping in the middle of my bed for the last few hours, only to discover that he wasn't napping. He died. FML

agreeclassic 66 860

vote type 1 3 555

Good boy

By AgathedeBlouse - 18/11/2008 06:42 - France

Today, as I do every morning, I woke up and gave my dog, who sleeps next to me, a kiss on the nose. Except that this morning he had been sleeping the other way round. I kissed him on the ass. FML

agreeclassic 27 580

vote type 1 25 188

By phillyfan4life - 21/02/2011 19:50 - United States

Today, I saw my dog sleeping, so I laid next to her and put her arm around my neck to be cute. Only for her to wake up and bite my nose. FML

agreeclassic 17 814

vote type 1 28 507

By Anonymous - 24/10/2015 16:41 - United States - Colorado Springs

Today, I woke up to my dog laying on the pillow next to me. When he saw that I was awake, he wagged his tail happily and then promptly sneezed in my face. FML

agreeclassic 23 542

vote type 1 3 246

By Anonymous - 27/08/2014 23:04 - United Kingdom - London

Today, I was woken up by my wife softly kissing me on the lips. Half asleep, I kissed her back, before quickly opening my eyes and realising it wasn't my wife; it was my dog. FML

agreeclassic 40 596

vote type 1 7 524

By Anonymous - 21/05/2011 21:29 - Denmark

Today, I woke up, rolled over, and kissed the boy who was peacefully sleeping next to me, cheerfully saying, "Good morning, baby!" That boy is my dog. FML

agreeclassic 16 431

vote type 1 34 846

By anonamous - 12/03/2012 21:45 - United States

Today, I hugged my dog and kissed her on the side of the face. She responded by mauling me across my own face. FML

agreeclassic 22 175

vote type 1 9 138

By Annie - 22/11/2009 22:07 - Mexico

Today, I noticed that my dog was feeling sad. I let him hop on my bed with me to make him feel better. It worked, right after he vomited all over my face and pillow. FML

agreeclassic 28 682

vote type 1 6 032

By Crystal_Nicole - 14/12/2013 05:05 - United States - Wichita

Today, my dog played dead just so I would leave him alone. FML

agreeclassic 41 525

vote type 1 7 075

By SHIT-BREATH - 05/06/2013 16:03 - United Kingdom - Chepstow

Today, my puppy came into my room, and I cupped his head in my hands and bent down to kiss him. As I did, I realized that the part of his head I was kissing was covered in his own shit that he'd seemingly been rolling in. FML

agreeclassic 47 510

vote type 1 15 117

41srsh 0

Monday 24 January 2011 12:18

how sad!

m2j 1

Monday 24 January 2011 12:17

aww

Comments

DemCherries 4

Tuesday 31 January 2017 4:35

oh no

DemCherries 4

Tuesday 31 January 2017 4:35

oh no

charlotte23479 13

Tuesday 5 September 2017 22:03

that's so awful :( rip

VDM sur Facebook

Keywords

Miscellaneous My ex Stalker Coworkers Love Internet Relatable AITA Pokémon Awkward Work Parenting Kids Annoying Shopping Underwear Jealousy Parents Thief Sex Intimacy Suspicious Family NSFW Birthday Gifts I need your advice Accident Abuse Moving home

Top

Today, I carried flat-packed boxes home from work to move my things into a new apartment. Whilst walking down the street, the wind kept blowing and spinning me round. A crowd eventually gathered, mistaking me for a street performer. Nobody helped or even threw me any loose change. FML

agreeclassic 33 160

vote type 1 3 833

Today, I wanted to call my mom to ask for advice but called my boss instead. I panicked and ended up talking about weekend plans like nothing was wrong. She now knows way too much about my personal life. FML

agreeclassic 97

vote type 1 453

Today, it’s my birthday. It’s 2:30 pm, and my parents are still sleeping while I watch television with my dog. I’ll probably also have dinner with my dog. Happy Birthday to me. FML

agreeclassic 922

vote type 1 168

Today, I'm so broke that I hand-washed my socks with a bar of soap that I stole from work. FML

agreeclassic 30 450

vote type 1 3 112

Today, my boss made me some tortellini for lunch. As I was happily eating it, he started to give me a massage, while talking to his friends in Greek. He told me that he said "She's my #1 cashier." Turns out, what he really said was "See, if you feed them well, they let you touch them." FML

agreeclassic 33 040

vote type 1 6 108

Today, my crush and I went longboarding, because she’s into it and I told her I was too. I’d never set foot on a longboard, but I figured I’d wing it and pray for the best. Long story short, I ended up with a broken arm and a concussion. Bad decisions, man. They suck. FML

agreeclassic 216

vote type 1 1 273

Similar FMLs

Good boy

TOP COMMENTS

Comments