Intimacy Today, I found that when a hot girl asks you whether you have...

Anonymous - 06/12/2011 06:45 - United Kingdom

Today, I found that when a hot girl asks you whether you have a girlfriend, saying, "I got 99 problems but a bitch ain't one" is not the best way to proceed. FML

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Carnival of Disasters
Dive into carnival, where hilarious costumes meet unexpected mishaps. Laughter is guaranteed, mask or no mask! …

MarkQ95 - 21/07/2013 23:58 - Ireland

Today, trying to flirt with a girl, I was trying to make it out as if I had a great sex life. I got stuck between saying "100% customer satisfaction" and "no complaints" and blurted out "100% customer complaints." FML

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Bad start

Anonymous - 04/08/2014 23:04 - Canada - Toronto

Today, I found out the hard way that no good girlfriend-boyfriend conversation ever started with, "Suppose I slept with your best friend…" FML

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Thanks

Miami6and3 - 26/08/2013 18:22 - United States - Pasadena

Today, I asked my mom if I was ugly. She said, "Ask your girlfriend." I said I didn't have one. She said "Exactly." FML

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No

grlks - 19/02/2009 07:08 - United States

Today, I told a girl that I liked her. She replied, "Don't." FML

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Nice try

Anonymous - - United States

Today, I tried to pick up a girl by asking her what the time was as a conversation starter. She responded by telling me it was time to pick a girl more in my league. FML

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No thanks

Anonymous - 28/03/2021 14:01

Today, it's been since 2014 that I've been looking for a girlfriend, and the average response I've gotten was no. Today I got, "Ew, hell no." FML

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ohmylordy - 29/10/2010 05:48 - United States

Today, while talking with my girlfriend about dating, I learned that she has had more girlfriends than I have. FML

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Numou - 08/12/2008 07:26 - France

Today, I pointed out to my girlfriend that she wasn't jealous. She replied, "Well actually, I am, I just can't prove it cause no one else is interested in you". FML

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Nox - 06/01/2010 07:25 - United States

Today, my girlfriend accused me of not having any friends. So I sent out a mass text saying "Hey, what's up?" to prove her wrong. I didn't get any replies. FML

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Nag nag nag

Anonymous - 06/03/2025 18:00 - Canada - Toronto

Today, my girlfriend complained about our recent dry spell. I've been under a lot of stress at work, but I told her some things she could do to help. She decided a better idea was to scream that I don't care about her needs, and that I should never "burden her" with my problems. FML

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imustbeinsane 2

Tuesday 6 December 2011 11:41

Now you got 100 problems and a bitch is one

StoryOfTheYear 14

Tuesday 6 December 2011 11:39

YDI?

sarahbear992 6

Wednesday 7 December 2011 9:37

YDI, even if it is an awesome song :P

howdmynosego 12

Wednesday 7 December 2011 10:58

Catchy but no

Ecklcakes 15

Wednesday 7 December 2011 12:01

I suppose the only reason there are any FYL is because people feel sorry for how stupid you are

xxhelenxx 0

Wednesday 7 December 2011 12:15

Annoymous is fake -.- if you guys havent noticed.

dpgft10 0

Wednesday 7 December 2011 14:54

Here's what it sounds like: Hi I'm brain dead from listening to only genre of music. FML I don't walk up to people and talk about how I'm an indestructible master of war if they threaten me.