Kids: Today, during a family game of basketball, my 15 year old son...

By nosexforthee - 23/01/2015 19:25 - United States - Katy

Today, during a family game of basketball, my 15 year old son shoved me hard to get the ball. I fell and cut my arm badly on the ground. I yelled at him for being an idiot. He replied "Oh jeez, a bleeding woman being a bitch, what a fucking shocker." My husband doubled over laughing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 677

You deserved it 7 999

Winter: Snow and Funny News
Snuggle up and laugh with our winter stories, where snow isn't the only thing sliding around! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

By just me - 13/05/2012 18:54 - Germany - Overath

Today, I argued heavily with my dad over being dragged to a family game of lacrosse. All through the game, he kept "accidentally" hurling the ball straight at me on the sideline. After he eventually nailed me straight in the heart, he screamed at me to "get out of the fucking way". FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 207

You deserved it 3 483

By lifesucks4me - 23/02/2009 12:51 - United States

Today, I'm playing basketball with my little brother. After jokingly blocking his shot, he turns to me and says, "You're a bitch." He's 6. After I asked him where he heard that word, he responded with, "Daddy calls you that when you're not around." FML

I agree, your life sucks 161 047

You deserved it 13 792

By vreenya - 08/04/2014 20:13 - Chile - Santiago

Today, my little brother was feeling like the god damned bratty douchebag he is and hurled a basketball at me. It missed, hit the wall, and rebounded straight into his face. He burst into tears, and I'm now grounded because my parents believed him when he said I threw it at him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 639

You deserved it 4 065

Shady tactics

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2013 but it's good stuff - Australia - Rowville

Today, at a mixed-family game of rugby, my dad resorted to calling me a "goddamned accident" and eventually body-slamming me, just so I'd stop playing long enough for his team to score. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 871

You deserved it 3 115

By Anonymous - 23/07/2016 23:04 - United States - Atlanta

Today, during a heated argument with my son, I lost my temper and called him a son of a bitch. He enthusiastically agreed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 878

You deserved it 19 311

So, here's the thing…

By dad - 28/04/2024 11:00 - United States

Today, my 6 year-old son and his cousin were play boxing. For fun, I taught them some real moves. I guess my son is a natural but my nephew got hit so hard he fell over and broke his arm. Now I have to explain this to my wife and her sister. FML

I agree, your life sucks 148

You deserved it 670

By get a grip, son - 30/05/2014 20:37 - United States - Pooler

Today, my 15-year-old son got so enraged at a fly that kept harassing him, that he ended up slapping himself in the face as it flew by him. This caused him to fall out of his chair, at which point he broke down into a mess of tears, humiliating me in front of everyone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 200

You deserved it 10 895

By Anonymous - 21/03/2011 03:34 - United States

Today, my boyfriend was buying a new hockey stick; to test it out he started hitting a ball around the aisle and decided to shoot it back into its bin. Instead the ball hit me dead in the mouth, giving me a fat lip. Instead of consoling me, my boyfriend yelled "GOAL!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 951

You deserved it 6 696

By anonymous - 09/10/2011 01:20 - Australia

Today, I was play-wrestling with my girlfriend. I ended up with a cut, three bruises on my arm and a black eye. She just giggled the entire time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 301

You deserved it 27 612

By mandy - 10/04/2009 15:35 - United States

Today, I was babysitting my neighbor's kid. We were playing in the yard, when he fell and got a small scratch on his leg. I gasp, and he takes a huge breath in and yells, "FUUUCK!!!" as loud as possible. The parents thought it was me, and the mother slapped me in the face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 73 302

You deserved it 3 562

davincidasecond 24

Saturday 24 January 2015 5:32

Grounded. For. Life.

604 11

Saturday 24 January 2015 5:32

Sounds like two guys in the house need to be grounded.

Comments

RubyRed829 12

Saturday 24 January 2015 5:47

Fastest way to get an ass kicking.

henrylikestreats 22

Saturday 24 January 2015 5:54

Well your son is charming.

nitrog100 21

Saturday 24 January 2015 5:56

Sorry, but that was hilarious. Obviously, it's inappropriate coming from your son, but it's still a perfect, 4th-degree burn.

SMHsohard 22

Saturday 24 January 2015 7:35

Were you born this stupid or did you have to work at it?

nitrog100 21

Saturday 24 January 2015 20:23

Is insulting me a sign of intelligence? How am I being stupid? The son referenced a commonly accepted cultural phenomenon and superimposed it on the current situation in a humorous manner. I acknowledged that the source was inappropriate, but in this case, it doesn't diminish the statement's comedic value. You're just a douche.

gintwinsmoore 20

Sunday 25 January 2015 15:31

right on, #31.

lwilson78 1

Saturday 24 January 2015 5:57

I would beat his ass... My sons almost 19 and would never talk to me or another female like that... Your husbands no better for laughing... I would of flipped out... He wants to call you a bitch I would of showed him how much of a bitch you can be...

bab3ruthl3ss 16

Saturday 24 January 2015 6:04

Yeaaah, you need to nip that shit in the bud. Can't believe your husband was laughing at it & encouraging him. Yikes:

Cath_Astald 9

Saturday 24 January 2015 6:04

huh that's a bad situation OP. Somewhere something went wrong. And maybe it helps to know it's not just your fault, your hubby obviously doesn't see how serious this is and he's not helping or backing you up when he's supposed to be, so I think you two should have a really long talk about your son. One thing I've learned is that regarding discipline parents must always act as one, no double standards, no excuses. Just talk to your husband. If he doesn't understand, it's time for family counseling. I wish you good luck!

Rocket___Candy 24

Saturday 24 January 2015 6:05

Wow 15 years old and he has the nerve to say something like that to his mom??? That's when you know someone isn't gonna be goin anywhere but school anytime soon

sabbyheartswhat 23

Saturday 24 January 2015 6:21

Welcome to the Stone Age, no electricity, no devices, no way out of the house. If I'd talked to my mom like that ever or even at 15, I probably wouldn't have teeth right now, or be able to sit down again.