The spirit world ElixirRose - - United States Today, I killed a centipede. Now every little itch I feel, I think it's the centipede's spirit coming back to haunt me. FML 18 708 47 078
Today, I had to stand outside the changing room while two of my coworkers had noisy sex. I just needed my car keys. FML 2 096 236
Today, my doctor told me I had "abnormally large breasts." This wouldn't be so bad if I wasn't a 20 year old man. FML 33 527 7 741
Today, I was visiting my sick grandmother in the hospital when my cousin and I were playing in some empty wheelchairs. After goofing off I said, "They're fun, but I would kill myself if I was in a wheelchair." A little boy rounded the corner and said, "Tell me about it." He was in a wheelchair. FML 13 321 82 100
Today, my boss called me to his office, and played back a recording of me telling a co-worker that if I still worked there in a year, I would hang myself. He then bitched me out for unprofessional conduct. The taped conversation took place over a year ago, with my recently ex-boyfriend. FML 29 685 7 735
Today, I went with my son to a conference about sexual education at his high school. I guess it was all too late, because among the attendees I saw three girls from the same high school who were already pregnant. They aren't even 18. FML 806 186
Today, the only notification I got on my phone all day was a reminder I set to take a fibre supplement and stool softener. FML 755 161
Centipede ghosts are pretty ****** scary.
paranoid much?