Student Me vs Inner Me By FML Approved - 08/09/2017 03:30 - France - Paris The darkness calls... I agree, your life sucks 395 You deserved it 107 Share Tweet Share
Today, my girlfriend, who is very self conscious about her body, finally decided to have sex with me. She told me to wait a few minutes, so I did. I stripped and turned around to find her in a one-piece swimsuit, with a hole cut out of the crotch. FML I agree, your life sucks 81 831 You deserved it 8 528
Today, I heard my daughter scream at my son through the bathroom door, "Are you jacking off in there or something?" and him scream back at her "Shut up you fucking cunt!" My daughter is 7 and my son is 8. FML I agree, your life sucks 135 059 You deserved it 80 717
Today, at work, an old man was having trouble using his credit card at the checkout. I told him to "just stick it in", and he replied with "I love it when you talk dirty to me." The whole line at the checkout laughed. FML I agree, your life sucks 54 185 You deserved it 23 625
Today, my doctor told me that I suffer from orgasm migraines. Basically, I get an intense migraine that lasts for hours after I have an orgasm. FML I agree, your life sucks 75 010 You deserved it 4 596
Today, after drinking myself to an oblivion, I awoke with a massive hangover. I didn’t want to go to work, but every excuse I came up with in my head screamed of alcoholics. When I arrived, my boss asked me why I was there. It was my day off. FML I agree, your life sucks 2 011 You deserved it 4 916
Today, my husband and my mother's hatred of each other has got so bad, I wasn’t aware of why until now. She was his headmistress in high school, then they had an affair while he was at university, shortly before he met me at a Starbucks and dumped her without knowing I was her daughter. FML I agree, your life sucks 843 You deserved it 99
Today, I walked into my kitchen to find a pigeon sitting on my stovetop. I live in a completely sealed apartment on the 12th floor of a NYC apartment building. FML I agree, your life sucks 437 You deserved it 81