Intimacy: Spread the word - FML

Spread the word

By JAY22 - 26/03/2009 11:41 - United States

Spicy

Today, this girl and I were chilling in my apartment. Things got heated up and we started making out. One thing lead to another, and the next thing I knew, she was giving me head. I was getting ready to bust when she stopped, looked up into my eyes and said, "Do you believe in Jesus?" FML

agreeclassic 224 256

vote type 1 35 831

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By Ben - 25/01/2010 03:31 - United States

Today, I was talking this pretty religious girl that I like. We were playing a game and I asked her if she could go back in history and meet anyone who would it be. She said Jesus. Without thinking I said "I mean someone that was real." FML

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By man - 30/10/2009 16:34 - United Kingdom

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Today, my girlfriend was giving me amazing head. I was really getting into it, when she looked up, and gave me a thumbs up. I can never take oral sex seriously again. FML

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By unbelievable208 - 05/08/2009 05:28 - United States

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Today, I was at my girlfriend's house. It was just me and her. Things began to get heated, and we started doing it on the living room couch. Near the end of it, I whispered in her ear, "Who's your daddy?" I then heard behind me, "I am." FML

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By BOO! - 25/05/2019 04:00

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Today, my girlfriend was giving me head. When I came, she was scared of the "stuff" that came out. FML

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Feed me with your kiss

By Anonymous - 18/09/2021 08:00

Spicy

Today, while having missionary sex, my girl was reaching a climax. She kept screaming a bunch of things like, “Yes!”, “Don’t stop!”, “Keep going.” Well, at least until a giant booger fell straight from my nose into her mouth. Then the only thing she was screaming was that I needed to leave. FML

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By BDSM4Jesus - 20/01/2015 04:42 - United States - Pittsburgh

Spicy

Today, while trying some new kinky things with my boyfriend, he cried out, "Call me Jesus!" Yeah... I think we're done with that. FML

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By WWJD - 01/03/2017 12:00 - United States

Spicy

Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend and I lustfully requested we try doggy style this time. He responded, "No, Jesus wouldn't like that." FML

agreeclassic 10 348

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Jesus wept

By chicochico - 19/12/2008 16:05 - France

Today, I had sex with a girl who cried out as she came, "Forgive me Lord! Forgive me Lord!" FML

agreeclassic 58 358

vote type 1 7 045

Get the hell out of there

By Anonymous - 01/09/2022 22:00

Today, my friend and I were driving to work, when she asked me to stop at the gas station. Ten minutes later, I see this woman come out, my friend right behind her. The woman spotted me, an intense look in her eyes. She marched over, threw a paper at me, and screamed, "Jesus died for our sins!" She then stormed off. I'm a crazy magnet. FML

agreeclassic 903

vote type 1 127

Technicality

By Anonymous - 22/04/2015 14:24 - United States - Altamonte Springs

Spicy

Today, my religious girlfriend convinced me to let her take my virginity. A few hours later, she broke up with me, crying and saying I was going to hell for having sex before marriage. But apparently she isn't, and she can't be with someone who "tempts" her. FML

agreeclassic 39 393

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Next

TOP COMMENTS

lolol182 4

Thursday 26 March 2009 20:00

ahahahahaha reminds me of the one where the girl said "forgive me lord!" when she came

Socrates_fml 0

Thursday 26 March 2009 20:02

how did you answer/what happened?

Comments

cowboyslife 14

Saturday 30 January 2016 4:22

She probably felt bad for what she did.

twentyonecliques 5

Monday 7 March 2016 18:44

i would respond with "do you?" and cum on her face

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Keywords

Miscellaneous Stalker My ex Coworkers Love Internet Relatable AITA Pokémon Awkward Work Parenting Kids Annoying Shopping Underwear Jealousy Parents Thief Suspicious Sex Intimacy Family NSFW Birthday Gifts I need your advice Accident Abuse Moving home

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