Kids and Health: So sweet - FML

So sweet

By Mom of 3 - 07/10/2018 15:30

Today, I was washing dishes while my 2-year-old was napping… or so I thought. When I finished and went to check on her, I found she'd taken off her diaper and smeared poop all over the carpet. She must have been up a while because it was everywhere. I spent the next hour scrubbing. FML

agreeclassic 2 969

vote type 1 440

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Similar FMLs

Stinky

By Carolina R-h - 18/06/2019 16:30

Today, my 2-year-old woke up from her nap with a full diaper, then decided to climb down from her bed and got stuck under the railing, leaving a stinky trail of poop everywhere. FML

agreeclassic 1 536

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That's not a child, that's a bio-hazard!

By Anonymous - 08/01/2018 09:00 - United States - Thomasville

Today, I took a shower while my two-year-old slept. In the 30 minutes it took me to shower, get dressed, and go back to his room, he had woken up, taken his pants and diaper off, and smears crap all over himself and his bed. FML

agreeclassic 3 794

vote type 1 823

Shidding and farding

By Anonymous - 07/09/2021 08:01

Today, I was babysitting my friend's two year-old daughter. Within 15 minutes, she had crawled out of her crib, taken off her diaper, and smooshed her poop in between the cracks in the floor. I put her in the tub, left to get a towel, and came back to her pooping in the tub. FML

agreeclassic 1 131

vote type 1 297

By Mom2grls808 - 19/12/2018 20:00 - United States

Today, I was taking a nap with my 5 month-old on the (carpeted) floor in the living room. When I woke up, my daughter had bombed her diaper, and her and the dogs were rolling in it on the carpet and tiled kitchen. FML

agreeclassic 2 207

vote type 1 524

By Getthelysol - 10/10/2018 05:00

Today, I gave my 8-month-old a bath in the kitchen sink after dinner, like I always do. Today, she decided to poop in it. FML

agreeclassic 2 336

vote type 1 1 543

By Anonymous - 14/05/2019 02:00

Today, at work, I came back from my break to find a child covered in mud. Turns out it wasn't mud. One of the other children had taken all of the poop out of their diaper and smeared it all over the floor, walls, and other children. The other teacher hadn't noticed, and I had to clean it all up. FML

agreeclassic 2 149

vote type 1 151

By Anonymous - 27/02/2010 06:36 - United States

Today, I was babysitting to make a few extra dollars. While changing one of the kid's diapers, I turned around to find the other kid gone. I turned back around frantically, only to get poop flung at my face. I guess I found him. FML

agreeclassic 27 625

vote type 1 3 180

Little bundles of joy

By SD. - 15/05/2021 16:06 - United States - Essex Junction

Today, I woke up to my lovely 16-month old with her diaper on. When I stood up to retrieve and toss it, I also realized she'd pooped into her hand and thrown a log onto the middle of the floor. FML

agreeclassic 811

vote type 1 181

By raebay - 05/11/2009 01:23 - United States

Today, after I bathed my nine month old, I laid her on my bed to grab a diaper. I turned around to see that she'd peed on my comforter. I then put her in her playpen to put my cover in the wash. I came back into the room to get her, and saw she'd taken off her diaper. She'd crapped in her playpen. FML

agreeclassic 33 932

vote type 1 8 372

By Anonymous - 17/04/2017 08:00 - Australia - Moonee Ponds

Today, my 3-year-old missed the toilet. In the time it took me to get paper towel to clean it up, my one-year-old decided it was the perfect puddle to play in. FML

agreeclassic 5 207

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Next

TOP COMMENTS

pscool 11

Sunday 7 October 2018 15:32

Parenting 101 never leave your kid unattended without clothes on they can’t takeoff

TumblrweedPasses 11

Sunday 7 October 2018 16:17

Oh hell no, i could never deal with offspring yikes

Comments

rebelwithmouseyhair 18

Monday 8 October 2018 10:55

Keep your kid where you can see them, hearing is not enough. When they're quiet is when you need to worry most.

StagGT 13

Monday 15 October 2018 18:05

Whenever there's a child, I just say you deserved it. THIS IS WHAT THEY DO, THEY ARE JUST LITTLE DEMONS

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Today, my brother paid the DJ $300 to ruin my wedding by playing the Imperial Death March as I walked down the aisle. FML

agreeclassic 52 094

vote type 1 7 225

Today, I got tired of my girlfriend always leaving the conversation when we chat, so I changed my number and email address, and texted her under a different name. We talked for hours non stop. Should I tell her it's me? FML

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vote type 1 140

Today, I found out that after moving in with my mother and her boyfriend into his place two months ago, she's breaking up with him, and leaving me stuck with him. Awkward. FML

agreeclassic 1 052

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Today, after I completely starved myself for a week and exercised every day in an attempt to lose weight, I instead gained 5 pounds. FML

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Today, I was chosen as King for our winter formal. Even after I won, nobody wanted to dance with me. FML

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Today, I overheard my daughter talking to her boyfriend over the phone about having sex. She said, "You have to piss on me to get me pregnant, that's what I heard anyway." She's 16. FML

agreeclassic 50 928

vote type 1 11 973