Sex, Gross and Intimacy: Mr Clean - FML

Mr Clean

By Anonymous - 18/01/2013 10:50 - United States

Spicy

Today, my boyfriend and I were getting intimate. I grabbed his butt to control his thrusts and got a clump of used toilet paper. FML

agreeclassic 66 306

vote type 1 7 606

When Christmas Ends Badly…
Rather than debating politics with Uncle Roger for the umpteenth time, share the best Christmas FMLs to finally have a good family meal! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Similar FMLs

By anonymous - 04/11/2014 12:03 - Canada - North Vancouver

Spicy

Today, I was giving my boyfriend a blowjob. I was laying in between his legs because it's just more comfortable. I looked down, and he had pieces of toilet paper sticking out of his butt cheeks. FML

agreeclassic 53 272

vote type 1 8 513

By Anonymous - 07/12/2011 17:47 - United States

Spicy

Today, my boyfriend and I were getting frisky. He pulled off my panties and was about to go down on me when he said, "Wait, what's this white thing?" It was a piece of toilet paper. FML

agreeclassic 40 918

vote type 1 20 696

By BarbieKen - 14/06/2009 04:14 - United States

Spicy

Today, as my boyfriend and I were messing around in his room he took off my underwear. As he was about to go down on me I spread my legs to help out then he looked up at me and said, "You got some toilet paper left behind." FML

agreeclassic 41 165

vote type 1 63 376

By Rella - 15/12/2018 03:00

Today, my boyfriend and I were in the 69 position with me on top and as we changed positions, and I turned to face him, I saw toilet paper on his face that he didn't seem to notice and that I casually had to wipe off his face. FML

agreeclassic 2 040

vote type 1 1 321

Grunge

By Anonymous - 20/12/2024 14:00 - United States - Brunswick

Spicy

Today, I was hanging out with my boyfriend. As I was about to give him head, I saw he had so much left over toilet paper stuck to his nuts. It kind of turned me off but I didn't want to say anything because he's one of the sweetest guys ever. After he nutted, he got up and there was toilet paper crumbs on his bed and ass. FML

agreeclassic 466

vote type 1 252

Mr Clean

By Jenn - 18/08/2021 09:59

Today, I discovered my new boyfriend doesn’t have toilet paper. He has a toilet cloth, which he instructed me to rinse off in the toilet after I was done. FML

agreeclassic 1 370

vote type 1 134

Rico Suave

By eww - 12/06/2025 20:00 - Czechia - Prague

Spicy

Today, my boyfriend and I tried to have sex, but every time he thrust into me, he farted. Loud, smelly, wet farts. After a minute, I shoved him off and demanded he take a dump. After a full five minutes of loud diarrhea, he came back to bed, his ass stinking of sewage. My pussy dried up so fast… FML

agreeclassic 513

vote type 1 108

By Anonymous - 30/05/2013 03:55 - United States - Redlands

Spicy

Today, my boyfriend and I were getting intimate on the bathroom floor. Somehow my nose managed to start bleeding, so he bent me over the tub and kept going because he didn't want to "ruin the moment". FML

agreeclassic 59 797

vote type 1 9 833

By Becca - 31/01/2010 05:06 - United States

Today, my boyfriend of 6 months asked me to spend the night at his apartment for the first time. I had to poop really bad when I got there, so I used his only bathroom. He went after me, and came out a few seconds later, gagging. Apparently, I clogged his toilet. FML

agreeclassic 34 093

vote type 1 7 046

Joe Bidet

By tmrwsmggls - 16/11/2020 14:01 - United States

Today, I went to the bathroom at my boyfriend's house. Right as I sat down and started taking a dump, I looked over at the empty toilet paper roll and remembered his roommate had told us the night before that they were out of toilet paper. FML

agreeclassic 958

vote type 1 357

Next

TOP COMMENTS

HelloSirs 14

Friday 18 January 2013 16:42

When they talked about this in Charmin commercials, I never believed them. Learn something new every day.

ElatedEarthling 15

Friday 18 January 2013 16:49

He was probably too wiped out to notice the extra toilet paper. I know it stinks, but it happens. Maybe next time you should just disregard it and stop being so anal.

Comments

nemoyae 1

Monday 4 February 2013 0:26

nasty

profligatesoul 18

Thursday 14 March 2013 2:45

Aren't you supposed to "freshen up" before you get it on?

JulieG65 15

Wednesday 24 April 2013 2:24

Haha eww!

kristen99 9

Sunday 26 May 2013 6:13

Should have listened to Charmin!

Bluemonster3 26

Friday 8 November 2013 1:31

How sexy...

Jebitesevsi 11

Wednesday 22 January 2014 3:09

Time to change your boyfriend!

mscouten 3

Sunday 24 August 2014 22:45

I just up in my mouth a little bit.

Solano2580 24

Wednesday 25 February 2015 20:03

I don't get why some women enjoy a man's nipple and ass, it just doesn't look appealing, then again I'm a guy so I wouldn't know

VDM sur Facebook

Keywords

Miscellaneous Stalker My ex Coworkers Love Internet Relatable AITA Pokémon Awkward Work Kids Parenting Annoying Shopping Underwear Jealousy Parents Thief Intimacy Suspicious Sex Family NSFW Birthday Gifts I need your advice Accident Abuse Moving home

Top

Top

Today, my boyfriend dumped me because 'I look like his hamster when I'm eating sunflower seeds.' FML

agreeclassic 33 612

vote type 1 5 864

Today, my girlfriend and I enjoyed a lovely shower together. It was indeed lovely until her father came into the washroom to say “Welcome to the family!” whilst taking a giant shit. FML

agreeclassic 2 665

vote type 1 595

Today, my boyfriend woke me up the same way he always does, by pulling on my hair. Just to be playful, I pulled him down on top of me and kissed him. Turns out his brother thought it would be funny to wake people up the same way. FML

agreeclassic 58 983

vote type 1 9 721

Today, I lost my virginity to my boyfriend. Not only did he last just 2 minutes, he also sat there for a while afterwards, smacking his semi-erect penis in awe and saying, "Look, it's still hard! How crazy is that?!" FML

agreeclassic 41 915

vote type 1 6 166

Today, I was invited to a birthday dinner at a restaurant. As I was leaving, I get a text from the birthday girl's boyfriend saying that it was cancelled. Hungry, I decided to go to that particular restaurant anyway. Turns out the party wasn't cancelled. Half the party just didn't want me there. FML

agreeclassic 43 627

vote type 1 4 285

Today, I was trying to entertain my crush at a party by showing off my juggling skills. I confidently grabbed three random objects, not realizing one was a jar of pickles. Mid-juggle, the jar slipped and shattered, splashing pickle juice all over my crush. She just stared at me in disbelief, while I stood there smelling like vinegar. FML

agreeclassic 89

vote type 1 736