Don't Touch My Fries By FML Approved - 22/10/2017 04:00 These aren't beetles... This is Sparta! I agree, your life sucks 471 You deserved it 123 Share Tweet Share
Today, my entire workforce downed tools today until I fire our new Human Resources rep, who in only a few weeks has made the workplace miserable and frustrating, and has increased sick leave by 48% due to the 'Can’t Deal With Her Bullshit' Virus. I can’t fire her; she’s the owner's mom. FML I agree, your life sucks 551 You deserved it 124
Today, I woke up with a swollen lump on my throat. It's extremely painful. My dad named it Gretchen and now talks about it as if it's a person. FML I agree, your life sucks 30 973 You deserved it 2 643
Today, my boyfriend told me he would be really disappointed if we had kids before we got married, because it would ruin our plans to go to Disney World for our honeymoon. Apparently, kids ruin vacations. FML I agree, your life sucks 1 209 You deserved it 1 189
Today, I went to my boyfriend's work to surprise him. When I got there, I called him on his phone to tell him to turn around. I saw him look at his phone. His co-worker next to him asked who that was. He replied, "Just this fat chick I know." FML I agree, your life sucks 52 829 You deserved it 4 505
Today, I learned the hard way that age is not just a number when I completely threw out my back while sitting on the ground, gently tossing a ball. FML I agree, your life sucks 846 You deserved it 118
Today, my school is having homecoming. I'm taking a date who I really like, and she happens to have fairly large boobs. I have a friend who seems to think I have an obsession with boobs, so I texted her last night reading "btw, no big boob jokes tomorrow." I accidentally sent it to my date. FML I agree, your life sucks 16 037 You deserved it 51 713