Dog Jump Fail By FML Approved - 18/10/2017 15:10 - United States - New York Practice doesn't always make perfect! I agree, your life sucks 436 You deserved it 111 Share Tweet Share
Today, I woke up to my stomach being torn up from the inside. Barely made it to the bathroom, but of course, it wasn’t the one in my room, where I could easily change my clothes after a quick shower. After running down all my new meds, I realized it had to be my new sleep aid. It was helping too. FML I agree, your life sucks 879 You deserved it 146
Today, my boyfriend broke up with me. He said I was way too good at sex so I must have lied about not having much experience, and he "wouldn't be with someone who is hiding something." WTF? FML I agree, your life sucks 89 538 You deserved it 7 006
Today, I finally got a promotion at work. Today I also found out that no matter how long I work, no matter how much effort and unpaid overtime I put in for 6 years, my coworkers will be convinced I only got promoted because I'm the CFO's son. FML I agree, your life sucks 24 237 You deserved it 2 653
Today, I went to the grocery store to stock up on booze for the weekend. After the cashier commented on the size my purchase, I claimed to be hosting a dinner party tonight. I'm not. FML I agree, your life sucks 8 796 You deserved it 34 568
Today, I ran into one of my teachers from high school. When I told her I'd just recently graduated college and was starting graduate school in the fall, she said, "You don't have to lie, some people just aren't cut out for college. There's no shame." I wasn't lying, I graduated with honors too. FML I agree, your life sucks 36 856 You deserved it 2 962
Today, I found the perfect job, which would help me escape my super toxic in-laws and marriage. I have all the educational and other qualifications for it, and it is a permanent well paying job with the government. Too bad the recruitment process takes years to complete, by which time I might've offed myself. FML I agree, your life sucks 950 You deserved it 193