My ex

He's a keeper

By Anonymous - 11/01/2023 03:00 - United States

Today, I got the news that my ex-boyfriend from two years ago died in a car crash. My fiancé found me crying in the living room when he came home from work. When he found out why I was inconsolable, he said, "Make sure you say hi to that abusive turd in hell for me, thanks for everything." He is now staying at a hotel. FML

I agree, your life sucks 868

You deserved it 1 633

Guilty

By jamienicole1993 - This FML is from back in 2015 but it's good stuff - United States - Savannah

Today, I woke up to a broken car window and a text from my ex that read, "Before you ask me, the answer is yes." FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 947

You deserved it 3 342

All in the family

By Anonymous - 23/08/2022 04:00 - Canada - Moose Factory

Today, I told my ex I was going to bed after a few drinks, and she ended up fucking my brother while I was asleep. What an awakening to hear. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 237

You deserved it 187

Bonus dilemma

By Conflicted - 23/04/2025 06:00 - United States

Today, my girlfriend told me she got a hefty bonus at work and will pay off my credit card debt. I was gonna break up with her because I’d been working on resolving things with my ex-girlfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 66

You deserved it 982

By badhabit - 31/05/2019 22:00

Today, I went out with my ex-girlfriend, with whom I have a good friendship with and am in fact still in love. I picked her up at her house and we had a perfect night together that ended with sex in my car. As I dropped her off, she turned to me and said, "I hope you know we're just friends." FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 892

You deserved it 1 708

Rubbing it in

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I got an invitation to my ex-boyfriend's wedding. We broke up because he "didn't believe in marriage." FML

I agree, your life sucks 79 895

You deserved it 4 872

Real housewives

By restraining orders are just paper - 20/03/2021 23:00

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me. The constant harassment, threats and stalking by my ex-wife have finally driven her away. This is the third time this has happened. My ex physically beat the other two up, and now she’s scared away the one I wanted to marry. The courts have done nothing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 943

You deserved it 146

Not worth it

By Anonymous - 03/12/2024 18:00 - United States - Portland

Today, out of the kindness of my heart, and so he wouldn't have to spend any money, I gave my ex-boyfriend my login information to my Vudu account. Big mistake. He logged me out of all devices, changed the password, and won't give me the new login information until I give him head. FML

I agree, your life sucks 261

You deserved it 789

Nothing but red flags

By Jullii - 27/08/2021 08:01

Today, my ex of 5 years began dating the girl he told me was, “One of the guys”, “Don’t worry, she’s like a sister to me” and, “I would never see her that way.” We broke up a couple of days ago because my “paranoia” and “assumptions” about her were putting a “strain” on our relationship. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 322

You deserved it 161

It's not you, it's me

By DyingAlone - 14/12/2021 23:01

Today, I met the guy my ex left me for. He's morbidly obese, has no personality, and got her drinking again, even though she has a problem. She says, "I've never been happier." Now everything I've done for my anxiety and depression has come undone, and I can't be convinced there isn't something horribly wrong with me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 429

You deserved it 282

Sounds lovely

By Anonymous - 08/04/2023 23:00 - United States

Today, at our kid's extracurricular, my ex, with whom I have been fighting for our child for ten years, casually admitted that his preferred murder weapon is an axe. This is surprisingly in character. FML

I agree, your life sucks 776

You deserved it 166

It's been a while…

By Anonymous - 08/04/2023 14:00

Today, I calculated how long it’s been since I had a partner. Works out to 7 years officially and 11 years unofficially. However, if you count the fact that my deadbeat ex wasn’t ever really present in the marriage, then I’ve been single all my life. FML

I agree, your life sucks 724

You deserved it 158

I get around

By Anonymous - 09/06/2025 20:00 - Sweden - Stockholm

Today, my slutty ex, whom I'd dumped because she cheated on me, cheated on her new boyfriend as well. With me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 101

You deserved it 709

Oddly specific

By Anonymous - 16/08/2024 13:00 - United States

Today, while planning for my wedding, I can’t stop thinking about my ex. He is my "one", and it’s still so hard to move on. Now I’m marrying someone for stability for my kids, not love, and it is the worst feeling. My heart will forever be in Harrisonville Missouri. He deserves the world, not Texas rain. FML

I agree, your life sucks 75

You deserved it 1 180

Horrible

By Anonymous - 03/08/2024 03:00 - United States - Anaheim

Today, I got told once again that I’m being a horrible mother by letting a man move in with me. We recently got engaged after 6 years together. Meanwhile, my ex has a new girlfriend practically every other month and forced our kids to call multiple women “Mommy.” Yeah, I’m the bad guy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 563

You deserved it 149

Mortifying

By Creeper - 20/02/2024 16:00 - United States - Seattle

Today, I accidentally liked my ex's new partner's photo while stalking them on social media. Now I have to decide between pretending it never happened if they happened to notice, or sending a fruit basket with a note that says, "Sorry for the accidental like. It's not you; it's muscle memory." FML

I agree, your life sucks 101

You deserved it 707

Besties

By Anonymous - 21/07/2021 08:01 - South Africa - Nottingham Road

Today, my boyfriend's ex-girlfriend just moved in with his mom. They've been in my face knitting and baking bread together. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 080

You deserved it 101

Never drunk call your ex

By Anonymous - 02/11/2022 22:00

Today, I went out with a friend to a bar. After several Cosmopolitans, I decided to finally call my ex and tell him everything about how I feel, and how I really miss him. In the end, he said that it’s all so sweet and he will call my later. He hasn't called me since then. Instead, I was blocked. FML

I agree, your life sucks 232

You deserved it 1 470

Rubbing it in

By lmiller - 24/01/2010 03:29 - United States

Today, when I logged onto Facebook, I discovered a friend request from my ex who broke up with me and deleted me months ago. Upon adding her, I was taken to her profile where I saw dozens of status updates talking about how much she loves her new boyfriend, who she dumped me for. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 878

You deserved it 9 905

Recipe for disaster

By Anonymous - 27/06/2022 06:00

Today, my ex-boyfriend asked me for emotional support because his crazy new girlfriend hit him in the face over a text of mine. Fuck his life, as I was only asking for his mum's ravioli recipe, but I'm a little surprised he's already on vacation with the new girl just two weeks after our break-up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 986

You deserved it 169

Never send nudes

By Anonymous - 20/03/2022 00:01

Today, I received a call from my employer. They found that some of my nudes have surfaced on the internet. Personal nudes and videos I took exclusively for my boyfriend. He denies he put them out there. Then who did? How stupid does he think I am? FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 128

You deserved it 614

Threatening

By I hate my family - 11/02/2023 10:00

Today, my mom told me to be my sister’s maid of honor at her wedding or I’m out of her will. She says if I don’t go, I’m being selfish, and she wants to see her “baby girls” bonding one last time before she dies. I would gladly go if my sister wasn’t marrying my ex-husband, who cheated on me with her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 499

You deserved it 129

Divorced dad energy

By Anonymous - 14/04/2023 07:00 - Canada - Vancouver

Today, I had to purchase an app to communicate with my ex-wife. She's too stupid to figure out how to unblock me in Hotmail so we can coordinate kid schedules. She is a control freak and regularly blocks/unblocks me depending on the time of the month. FML

I agree, your life sucks 787

You deserved it 232

Don't look back

By WhataStrangeTripThisIs - 16/07/2021 20:01

Today, out of pure desperation and loneliness, I went out with my ex-boyfriend. It ended with him hitting me and driving off with my car. He's in jail now. What was I thinking? FML

I agree, your life sucks 831

You deserved it 724

Like a house on fire

By Anonymous - 14/01/2023 22:00

Today, my current girlfriend and my ex-girlfriend met each other. I don’t know how but they’re currently both getting on splendidly, while being mad at me like I’m the enemy of all womankind and should be castrated without delay. I want to go home. FML

I agree, your life sucks 805

You deserved it 304

Exes from hell

By what the actual fuck?! - 02/08/2021 07:01 - United States

Today, my psychotic ex-boyfriend hit a brand new low. I was served court papers, saying that he’s suing me by demanding I give him a paternity test for my daughter. He’s also telling everyone he’s her real father. He and I were broken up for more than a year before I even got pregnant. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 228

You deserved it 114

What do I do?

By ouch - This FML is from back in 2013 but it's good stuff - Canada - Charlottetown

Today, I thought maybe I should go to my doctor because my hips crack every time I take a step. But she's also my recently ex-boyfriend's mom, so I have to choose between being in constant pain or having my doctor poke at my hips while asking me why I'm no longer dating her son. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 051

You deserved it 6 375

How cruel can one get?

By Anonymous - 29/08/2023 21:00 - United Kingdom

Today, out of spite, my ex bought our autistic son a puppy. He's always wanted a dog and I can’t imagine how violent he will get if I tell him we can’t keep it. Since the divorce, I can barely feed us, so a dog is an expensive luxury we simply can’t afford, and my ex knows that. Pure spite. FML

I agree, your life sucks 953

You deserved it 162

Creep

By fu2then - This FML is from back in 2010 but it's good stuff - Canada

Today, I ran into my manipulative ex-boyfriend at a party. We were chatting and I mentioned that the guys I have been seeing lately all turn out to be jerks. He said, "Yeah well, you dumped me and don't deserve to be happy." Apparently he has been creeping and scaring off any guys interested in me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 394

You deserved it 4 260

Still on the hook

By Just too submissive - 24/06/2025 22:00 - Netherlands

Today, my ex said he was coming by to get some of his stuff, and that if I wanted to talk, I should be on my knees in my best lingerie. I was furious and wrote a text telling him how awful and misogynistic he was… then deleted it, put on my best lingerie, and am now waiting by the door on my knees for him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 87

You deserved it 1 068

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The Top

Today, I was pretending to be an angry bear while babysitting a 3 year-old boy, and an 19 month-old girl. I was chasing them around the house, having a great time. Just when I bent over to pick up his sister for a diaper change, the 3 year-old decided it was his turn. He bit me square on the ass. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 167

You deserved it 11 264

Today, it's day three of my dad not shutting up and still complaining about the Super Bowl commercials being "too woke". FML

I agree, your life sucks 787

You deserved it 236

Today, I was at a party with my girlfriend and this older guy came in and started talking to me about his rock climbing lessons earlier that week. I told him "I'm really drunk, so I really couldn't give a shit about what you did." It was my girlfriend's father picking her up to go home. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 056

You deserved it 73 697

Today, I met my boyfriend's brother. When he saw me, he whispered into my boyfriend's ear, "So, this is your bitch eh? Nice!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 981

You deserved it 5 721

Today, my sister went into a blind rage at me for "upstaging" her by announcing that I'm pregnant, two months after she did the same. My husband and I have been trying for two years. She's in high school and doesn't even know who the father is. FML

I agree, your life sucks 76 817

You deserved it 3 849

Today, I got to sleep in the same bed as the love of my life...and her new boyfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 497

You deserved it 5 932