Cars

Funny how?

By Jessie - 23/02/2009 08:08 - United States

Today, I drove to a party after getting my car back from the shop. A thunderstorm started as I made my way there and upon arriving, the power went out. The guests decided to watch the storm from the front windows when someone mentioned how funny it would be if a tree fell on my car. Seconds later, one did. FML

I agree, your life sucks 67 391

You deserved it 3 531

Oh, look…

By cocokiss410 - 28/07/2011 04:34 - United States

Today, while I was at work, a co-worker watched while some kid stole the radio out of my car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 672

You deserved it 2 734

Careful

By me. - This FML is from back in 2012 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, while driving, I slowed down and made sure I safely went by a pedestrian, and in the process rear-ended the car in front of me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 518

You deserved it 22 801

Lies and love don't mix

By Gregoree - 16/04/2022 00:01

Today, I borrowed my mom’s BMW to impress my new girlfriend. I'd told her that I owned an accounting firm, so I had to look the part. Today was also the day someone decided to rear-end us. That someone happened to be my boss at Burger King. Let’s just say, the cat’s out of the bag and I’m single now. FML

I agree, your life sucks 185

You deserved it 3 069

Boots on the ground

By Anonymous - 03/06/2025 00:00 - Germany - Essen

Today, when I took off my shoes to change into my work boots, I smelled dog poop. I must have stepped in it on the way to my car this morning. Guess what the floor mat of my brand new car looks (and smells) like… FML

I agree, your life sucks 392

You deserved it 120

Suspicious behavior

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I found out that driving five miles an hour under the posted speed limit is "suspicious" and cause for a field sobriety test, breathalyzer, having your car searched and being handcuffed on the side of the road. FML

I agree, your life sucks 81 642

You deserved it 12 849

No soup for you

By Anonymous - 30/09/2021 19:01 - United States - Janesville

Today, I filled a bag full of Beer Cheese soup. Set it on the passenger seat to take home. Got home to realize the bag was leaking. The passenger seat and floor are covered in soup. My car is new. FML

I agree, your life sucks 368

You deserved it 1 279

Charged

By Stickerless - This FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I was pulled over for not having my car inspection up to date. I had my car inspected two weeks earlier. Since I'm at college my sticker was mailed to my home. My mother didn't want to pay the 42 cent postage, so now I have to pay $250 because my mother is cheap. FML

I agree, your life sucks 64 535

You deserved it 4 488

You can't see for shit

By Anonymous - 21/05/2021 18:01 - United States

Today, my parents still won't let me drive in the dark. I'm 30 years-old. FML

I agree, your life sucks 781

You deserved it 525

Priorities

By Earths_Venus - 19/11/2009 22:31 - Australia

Today, I was driving to my new home with a lot of my belongings in the car. I could hear things shifting in the back. When I parked, I opened the door, ready to catch my vodka. I caught it - and watched my laptop slide out of the car, onto the concrete, and break into 3 pieces. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 807

You deserved it 35 764

Thank you for your service

By Anonymous - 07/08/2021 16:01

Today, we have a double driveway, but after my wife left, someone parked in my wife’s spot, presumably to avoid the public car park fee a few streets away. I called a tow company and very specifically asked them to tow the intruding red car, but they towed my black work truck instead. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 158

You deserved it 138

Waiting anxiously

By ProFesser - 28/03/2017 16:00

Today, while heading outside to go to work, I slip on my driveway and my coffee thermos-mug ends up flying out of my hand, and smashes my next door neighbor's brand new truck window. The thermos-mug broke and splashed hot coffee all over his seats too. He's a hard-ass military dude. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 566

You deserved it 723

Whatcha up to over there?

By confusedaf - 13/01/2022 02:01

Today, my husband called and said he couldn’t make it home tonight from a party, because his car's battery had died and his friends didn’t have any jumper cables. When I offered to pick him up, he adamantly declined. I offered an Uber. Again, declined, and he got pissed, saying, “Stop worrying so much!” and hung up on me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 278

You deserved it 218

You OK, lady?

By merp. - This FML is from back in 2013 but it's good stuff - United States - Wausau

Today, I spun off the road and into a ditch. The insurance company told me I'd have to wait an hour, as they had other cars to tow first. I had to pee so badly that I resorted to using the only thing I had in my car: a plastic bag. That's when I got a knock on my window from the tow truck driver. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 031

You deserved it 6 222

Community policing

By phant776 - 13/05/2011 04:02 - United States

Today, I was pulled over by a cop. He asked for my license and registration, so I reached for my center console. I was then greeted with a gun to my ear because my coffee cup supposedly looked like a gun. I stepped out of my car to apologize, and I was hit with a big stick. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 471

You deserved it 9 323

Cannonball

By Anonymous - 04/07/2024 23:00

Today, after her very first driving lesson, my daughter came home claiming she did really well. Which is suspicious since her instructor was at that moment on the phone with me yelling, saying I must be crazy if I think she’s ever getting in his car again, and that I should explain to her what a bus pass is. FML

I agree, your life sucks 524

You deserved it 113

It's the big T

By Annoyed - 28/03/2025 15:00 - United States

Today, I left my apartment building to drive to work. I walked up to my car when I noticed someone had written "FUCK ELON" on the hood. I guess some protesters can't spell, which explains how they'd confused "Toyota" for "Tesla." FML

I agree, your life sucks 545

You deserved it 76

Haste

By JulieFromMars - 15/08/2024 09:00 - Ireland - Galway

Today, I was running late for work and I was carrying my stuff to my car, handbag over my shoulder, laptop in one hand, and my coffee in the other. As I tried to unlock my car, I spilt the coffee all over myself, the car, and my laptop. Now, I’m sticky, wet, and my laptop won't turn on. FML

I agree, your life sucks 330

You deserved it 272

Messy

By Anonymous - 11/06/2025 00:00 - Canada - Surrey

Today, I was playfully walking back to my car with my girlfriend. My door was unlocked. I then noticed my car had stuff scattered inside. A bum had just robbed and ransacked my car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 389

You deserved it 119

Thanks dude

By Marcus - 10/04/2021 02:00 - Norway

Today, I was driving to work when I had to abruptly brake to avoid a pedestrian who had suddenly jumped into the street. As a consequence, my parking ID was pushed in between the dashboard and the windshield. It is literally impossible to get it out before my shift starts. In other words, I'm going to get fined. FML

I agree, your life sucks 939

You deserved it 154

Promises, promises

By IHateMyLife - 06/04/2021 00:30

Today, my boyfriend promised me to cook dinner if I picked him up from work, almost 100 km and 2-hour drive. I did this even though I worked the night shift yesterday and had to today and normally have to sleep a lot. But no, after we got home, he fell asleep and was still sleeping and snoring when I had to go. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 458

You deserved it 202

Nature is healing

By kat, ACT - 20/12/2009 14:37 - United States

Today, while driving, we pulled up at a set of traffic lights next to a huge truck with live animals inside. Curious as to exactly what animal, I wound down my window to see if I could hear them, just in time for the truck to take off and cow shit to fly in my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 494

You deserved it 11 685

Bye bye love

By unknown - 27/11/2012 18:45 - Canada - Winnipeg

Today, I ran across the street due to a line of cars waiting for me to cross. Just as I reached the other side, my iPhone slipped out of my hand and fell into the road, just in time to get run over by multiple cars, one after the other. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 108

You deserved it 7 369

Bad day

By Anonymous - 04/03/2022 06:00

Today, I drove to my job and got a parking ticket for parking in my assigned parking spot. On top of that, my mom's dog gave birth to her puppies in my bathroom. I currently have a parking ticket and ten dogs in my apartment. FML

I agree, your life sucks 929

You deserved it 115

Pumped

By Rita - 11/01/2024 03:00 - United States

Today, while pumping gas at the gas station, two men pulled up to my car, opened the passenger door, grabbed my handbag and sped off. The $2000 handbag that my husband worked pretty much all last year for to gift me for Christmas, my wallet, and my diabetes medication. FML

I agree, your life sucks 720

You deserved it 250

Look out!

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, on my way to work, I swerved to avoid hitting a dead animal. Too bad I ended up hitting a live one instead. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 571

You deserved it 9 176

By llostinreality - 30/09/2018 07:00 - United States - Milwaukee

Today, the blinker on my car was broken so I decided to play it safe and drive a different car to work. I guess it wouldn’t have mattered which car I drove, as the cop nicely told me one of the headlights was out when he pulled me over. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 021

You deserved it 409

Heavy sleeper

By tootles - This FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I was kicked out of my parents' house, so I ended up sleeping in my truck bed because I had nowhere to go. I was then awoken by a "beep beep beep" noise. I was being towed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 654

You deserved it 6 384

Money pit

By Stephanie - 03/05/2026 13:00 - United States - Vincennes

Today, my car was stolen. They found it and I wish they never had. Full coverage would have paid the car, but instead the repairs cost $1700. My deductible was $2000. It ended up costing me $2000. The people who fixed my ignition broke my remote start. I have to fight to get them to pay for that repair. FML

I agree, your life sucks 392

You deserved it 60

By Username - 08/07/2011 20:02 - United States

Today, I noticed a woman struggling to work a parking meter, so I went over to help. She took one look at me before screaming, hitting me in the face, and running back to her car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 236

You deserved it 3 616

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The Top

Today, a cashier asked me if I would like to donate to breast cancer research. Since I have already made my donations this month, I politely declined. The cashier snorted and said, "Maybe you'll feel differently if someone you love got cancer." I'm a two-year survivor. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 031

You deserved it 2 450

Today, I took my girlfriend's virginity. A few minutes in she remarked, "If this is what sex is normally like then I'm seriously disappointed." FML

I agree, your life sucks 63 271

You deserved it 17 293

Today, I slept over at my friend's house but forgot my glasses. When I woke up in the morning, I came out of his room and forcefully kicked what I thought was a soccer ball on the floor. Turns out it was his miniature poodle - it fell down a long flight of stairs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 978

You deserved it 115 455

Today, I got up at 2:30 a.m. to catch an early flight home. I was tired and drowsy and took a quick shower to wake me up. Two minutes in, the water turned scalding hot on all settings. I ended up having to rinse my hair with bottles of sparkling water from the hotel minibar. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 271

You deserved it 382

Today, I spent ages writing a draft press release as part of a copywriting job application. I worked really hard and read it through several times before submitting. They emailed me to point out that I'd misspelled the name of the company. Twice. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 761

You deserved it 2 713

Today, I managed to run over my own foot with my own car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 459

You deserved it 669