johnnyshinta

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Johnnyshinta's favorite FMLs

By Anonymous - 28/09/2009 21:00 - United States

Today, I learned that if you're going to tell your mother you are gay, make sure she isn't holding a frying pan filled with hot grease. FML

agreeclassic 64 925

vote type 1 14 933

By Haley. - 26/03/2010 23:58 - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I were trying to have intercourse for the first time. One minute into it, he got nervous and farted. What's worse is that his fart scared him, and he asked "What was that?" FML

agreeclassic 40 333

vote type 1 6 545

Teaching moment

By ohno - 10/03/2010 11:05 - United States

Today, I went to see a movie with my best friend, and there were three girls loudly discussing blowjob techniques. I texted my boyfriend about how gross the conversation was. His reply was, "Pay attention. You might learn something." FML

agreeclassic 15 394

vote type 1 29 730

By Anonymous - 30/11/2009 20:35 - United States

Today, me and my girlfriend were riding on my motorcycle. While at a stop light, she started to make these weird noises. Turns out she was having an orgasm. I still can't give her one. FML

agreeclassic 30 408

vote type 1 6 388

By Anonymous - 31/10/2009 19:40 - United Kingdom

Today, I had a terrible stomach bug. I quickly jumped off the toilet and crouched over the bowl. I vomited with such force that I splashed the shitty water back into my face. FML

agreeclassic 48 791

vote type 1 6 766