Intimacy: Today, my boyfriend asked me for a blow job. After I said "no"...

By omgwhyme - 08/01/2012 14:36 - United States

Today, my boyfriend asked me for a blow job. After I said "no" over ten times, he decided to get up and slap me across the face with his penis. FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 473

You deserved it 49 369

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Same thing different taste

By besviken - 18/11/2012 22:53 - Sweden - Uppsala

Today, I had the best sex of our relationship with my boyfriend. Afterwards, he took off his condom, looked me sweetly in the eyes for a few moments, then decided to slap me in the face with it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 486

You deserved it 6 337

By Anonymous - 14/03/2011 19:16 - United States

Today, I told my boyfriend that I love him. He responded by asking for a blowjob. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 021

You deserved it 14 604

Double standard

By NoSexForMe - 13/07/2014 07:46 - United States - Rancho Cucamonga

Today, I asked my boyfriend if he could finally go down on me. He said, "No, that's disgusting" and then asked me for a blowjob. FML

I agree, your life sucks 67 850

You deserved it 8 666

So generous

By noway - 10/08/2011 17:47 - Singapore

Today, I got into a fight with my boyfriend. The only thing he could think of to cheer me up was to give me "permission" to give him a blowjob. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 198

You deserved it 7 113

Wrong sort of poking

By Anonymous - 22/09/2013 05:40 - United States - Brandon

Today, my boyfriend got out of the shower and tried to hit my forehead with his penis. He slipped and slapped me in the eye with it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 219

You deserved it 9 747

Enticing

By Anonymous - 20/06/2014 21:19 - United Kingdom

Today, I was feeling frisky and asked my boyfriend if he wanted a blowjob. He said, "Fuck no", then rolled over to go to sleep. FML

I agree, your life sucks 57 329

You deserved it 9 646

Frustrated wank

By Anonymous - 05/10/2023 19:00

Today, I gave my boyfriend a handjob for the first time. Apparently, I was so bad at it that he eventually just slapped my hand away and angrily said he'd do it himself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 620

You deserved it 329

Sexy talk

By suckstosuck - 23/07/2013 04:04 - United States - Dana Point

Today, I was getting freaky with my boyfriend and told him to spank me. In a seductive voice, he told me not to tell him what to do. Continuing, I asked him how he was going to punish me, to which he then replied, "I'm going to punch you straight in the face." FML

I agree, your life sucks 63 792

You deserved it 13 704

By Anonymous - 07/04/2015 21:00 - Canada - Calgary

Today, I woke up to my boyfriend repeatedly whispering in my ear, "You want to give me a blowjob". Yes, he actually thought it would work. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 057

You deserved it 4 689

No nut will do that

By Anonymous - 02/05/2023 00:00

Today, my boyfriend wanted a blowjob, shortly after we've started dating. He said to be careful because he blows a massive load. Thinking he's full of crap, I rolled my eyes and got to work. Had him going and then a massive load shot down my throat and a bunch of fire hoses sprayed out my nose. It burned so bad. FML

I agree, your life sucks 470

You deserved it 1 556

WCARlover 34

Sunday 8 January 2012 19:53

Apparently she didn't feel like doing it you selfish ********...girls don't always have to want penis in their mouth

The_Plagiarizer 4

Sunday 8 January 2012 20:38

Buy a ***** and slap him back.

Comments

cidman420 5

Sunday 8 January 2012 22:35

if u don't do it I'm sure he can find someone who will

Horcruxer 0

Sunday 8 January 2012 22:36

And confirms more women on fml.

charwars 0

Sunday 8 January 2012 22:37

That guy doesnt deserve to be called your boyfriend

maxsonje 0

Sunday 8 January 2012 22:39

Should if just said yes

WhiteRangerKid 5

Sunday 8 January 2012 22:43

What a dick (no pun intended)

ganjaone 2

Sunday 8 January 2012 22:43

If u don't please him, he'll find someone who will. Remember that....

Awsumuzzie 12

Sunday 8 January 2012 23:01

If you don't respect her, she'll find someone who will. Remember that....

dragynfyre 4

Monday 9 January 2012 0:01

she's better off if he does.

Ressamies 6

Sunday 8 January 2012 22:45

What an asshole.

luvlysc 2

Sunday 8 January 2012 22:46

Dump him. After you junk punch him.

loller27 6

Sunday 8 January 2012 22:47

dude that blows

HaloOfTheSun302 0

Sunday 8 January 2012 22:48

Because boys are icky

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Today, I got some really bad mosquito bites on the outside of my thighs. They itched, and my jeans prevented me from scratching them, so I unbuttoned my pants, stuck my down my leg and started scratching. My mom walked in, and won't believe I wasn't masturbating. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 982

You deserved it 6 647

Today, my nurse girlfriend told me she's more attracted to the veins in my arm than any other part of me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 639

You deserved it 3 781

Today, my bio teacher decided to put a plant in his classroom, and I'm allergic to it. Apparently, my hives and runny nose aren't enough to convince him to get rid of it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 892

You deserved it 1 723

Today, I went to the grocery store in my brand new high heels. I tried to be graceful as I walked down the aisle but ended up slipping on some spilled juice and doing a weird half-dance, half-flailing thing. The shoppers around me turned to watch as I clumsily tried to regain my balance. As if that wasn’t bad enough, I also knocked over a display of discounted snacks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 200

You deserved it 401

Today, as I was driving home after work, it was already dark. Some person in all black clothing came out of nowhere and jumped on my hood. It was the crazy ex I’ve been avoiding for 3 years. Of course, he said I hit him on purpose for revenge. Funny seeing how I moved towns over to get away from him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 803

You deserved it 125

Today, my 3 year old daughter's Halloween costume finally got delivered. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 009

You deserved it 2 109