This is a Nearly FML. It’s an FML, nearly. It got positive votes from the users, by wasn’t approved by our team.

By Gassed Out - 04/10/2016 11:57 - United Kingdom - Middlesbrough

Today, my adorable new kitten woke me up with a cute meow right into my ear, since she was so cute, I decided to pet her, only to get my fingers bitten, and her to fart and leave me with a stench that can only be described as Satan's asshole after a particularly bad curry. I retched. FML
I agree, your life sucks 1 796
You deserved it 198
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Top comments

URBeingLied2 23

It needs blood to survive and releases noxious gases to kill its prey. You were lucky you woke up during its war cry.

18 0
KyoshiroT 32

Cute pets are always evil as they say. Don't worry, your kitty might've been scared since 'it' never been petted before. But as for the smell, I may have vomited in my mouth if that were me.

7 1

Comments

KyoshiroT 32

Cute pets are always evil as they say. Don't worry, your kitty might've been scared since 'it' never been petted before. But as for the smell, I may have vomited in my mouth if that were me.

7 1
GhostFox 33

Why not just use the pronouns given for the animal in the post? Why go to 'it'?

4 2
sturschaedel 27

She just wanted you to feed her. Cats are shellfish like that.

0 7
URBeingLied2 23

It needs blood to survive and releases noxious gases to kill its prey. You were lucky you woke up during its war cry.

18 0