Delivery

You have arrived at your destination

By Anonymous - 30/01/2023 10:00

Today, an Edible Arrangements driver knocked on my door with the most delicious-looking gift! He was just asking for directions. FML

I agree, your life sucks 717

You deserved it 131

Gimme my stuff

By siciliano12594 - 12/11/2012 18:40 - United States - Harrison

Today, I learned that last week, the UPS man gave my package to my neighbor for safekeeping. It was over five-hundred dollars' worth of merchandise. My neighbor left for Canada on Saturday. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 162

You deserved it 1 960

Tangled web

By Anonymous - 03/11/2024 12:00 - United States

Today, I received my Amazon order of a mini massage gun, which I’d been really excited about. I tried it out, but it got tangled in my hair so badly that I had to cut it out. Now I have a bald patch. FML

I agree, your life sucks 278

You deserved it 271

Controlling

By EzcemaQueen - 30/08/2023 14:00

Today, I found out why all my packages have been systematically disappearing. My husband throws them out because he’s “sick of my selfish online shopping spree habits.” That would be more understandable if I had actually been online shopping, and not ordering my special eczema toiletries and medications. FML

I agree, your life sucks 882

You deserved it 147

Egg mode activated

By Anonymous - 03/11/2022 18:00

Today, my girlfriend insisted on dressing me up in her clothes, to spice things up. After dolling me up in a dress, heels, wig, etc., she goes to the store for wine but left her key behind. Thirty minutes later, the doorbell goes, so I open it in all my feminine glory, only to see a UPS guy standing holding a parcel and not my girlfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 076

You deserved it 839

Thanks!

By Yuri - 29/09/2024 09:00 - United States - Gloucester

Today, I opened the door to a pizza delivery guy. I hadn't order any, but I thought maybe my roommate had. As he handed me the box, I said, "Thanks, you too" when he told me to enjoy my meal. He stopped, looked confused, and said, "Wait, what?" before leaving. I then realized my roommate was out of town and I’d just taken someone else’s pizza. FML

I agree, your life sucks 129

You deserved it 398

Slapstick delivery

By KLO65 - 14/03/2025 09:00 - Canada - Vancouver

Today, after I ordered a large package online, it arrived with a massive dent. I called customer service to complain, but when the customer service guy asked for a photo, I went to grab my phone to take the picture. I tripped, dropped my phone, and recorded a video of me swearing loudly. I ended up sending the video along with the complaint. FML

I agree, your life sucks 177

You deserved it 417

Pizza mystery

By Pick out the picks - 24/09/2022 15:30 - United States

Today, I picked out a toothpick from a pizza. This is not the first time I've had to do this. It is also not the first time that I didn't see it until less than a second before I bit down on the piece with the toothpick embedded in it. Looks like there's a toothpick assassin on the loose. FML

I agree, your life sucks 890

You deserved it 135

Thanks UPSDHLFML

By Anonymous - 23/09/2021 04:59

Today, my friend received a package I sent her by mail. The package was already ripped open on arrival, two out of the three blouses I sent her were missing and a limited edition glass cup I sent her with the apparel was smashed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 047

You deserved it 82

Get on with it

By Luk - 01/07/2025 05:00 - Japan - Tokyo

Today, my wife gave me hell for not returning an Amazon package to Whole Foods on my day off. The closest Whole Foods is twenty minutes away, right by my work. Why should I waste an hour of my day off when I can do it after work tomorrow? FML

I agree, your life sucks 495

You deserved it 98

Home delivery

By Anonymous - 13/07/2021 08:01

Today, I received two letters: an eviction notice and a Dear John. Neither went through the mail. FML

I agree, your life sucks 836

You deserved it 94

Razor sharp focus

By Anonymous - 12/09/2024 15:00 - United Kingdom

Today, my husband spent all day on Skyrim trying out trick archery shots, things like shooting the butterflies, shooting a running rabbit, shooting himself by firing into the air. Meanwhile, I’d been at work, the kitchen was a mess, he didn’t walk the dog, and he missed my Amazon delivery. FML

I agree, your life sucks 436

You deserved it 127

Timing is key

By Anonymous - 17/09/2021 08:04

Today, we live in a society where an Uber Eats order arrives a lot faster than the authorities. To make things worse, the Uber Eats order arrives screwed up as well. FML

I agree, your life sucks 752

You deserved it 138

Introverts! Hide!

By ??? - 17/01/2025 22:00 - United States

Today, I was home alone when the doorbell rang. I panicked and hid under the table because I wasn’t expecting anyone and I have minor social anxiety. It was just Amazon dropping off a package. I made eye contact with the delivery guy through the window. FML

I agree, your life sucks 157

You deserved it 493

Bigmouth Strikes Again

By Username - 25/10/2010 11:03 - France

Today, it was my first day as a mailman. One of the houses got a bunch of cards, and the owner coincidentally opened the door as I arrived. So I said to the owner that someone in the house must really be popular. He replied, "She died this Tuesday." FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 324

You deserved it 6 635

I am business

By Viscerion - 15/02/2023 13:30 - Australia - Adelaide

Today, I sold an item on eBay and received $8.36 after fees. It cost me $1.39 for a satchel and $9.70 postage. It cost me $2.73 to give someone my item. FML

I agree, your life sucks 391

You deserved it 873

The nerve!

By Anonymous - 06/12/2021 20:01

Today, a couple of packages were stolen from our apartment doorstep shortly after being delivered. A little while later, the thief brought the torn packaging back and left them at the bottom of our stairs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 889

You deserved it 87

Thief!

By mystery - 19/09/2021 05:00

Today, my mom blocked me on everything, kicked me out of her house, and declared that I'm "dead to her." Why? She ordered a package, but it never came. I’m still trying to process how that could possibly be my fault. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 160

You deserved it 76

Christmas gifts

By not a thief - 24/12/2021 01:59

Today, while I was home sick from work, my neighbor got packages delivered. Our apartments have had a lot of thefts lately so, being neighborly, I brought her stuff inside to wait. When she came home, I gave them right to her. Instead of thanking me, she told the office that I was the thief all along. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 246

You deserved it 148

Mix up

By Anonymous - 07/08/2021 08:01

Today, I ordered DoorDash to my home. I sat outside waiting for it, starving, when my husband came out, laughing at me. The DoorDasher had called, I'd accidently sent it to my work. FML

I agree, your life sucks 427

You deserved it 828

What was in the box?

By Anonymous - 29/09/2024 22:00 - United States - Burlington

Today, I got a notification that a package had been delivered. I opened my door and saw it on at doorstep. I was expecting one, so I grabbed and opened it, then realized it wasn’t mine, but my neighbor’s. I had to awkwardly re-tape it, then sneak over and leave the disturbing contents of the box on their porch before they noticed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 366

You deserved it 162

Innocent

By Boyufd - 19/01/2019 12:00

Today, I almost got arrested. The cops put me in handcuffs without searching me first and told me that I "matched" the description of a package thief. Turns out, I didn't even closely fit the description of the suspect. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 638

You deserved it 144

Peckish

By Ethan - 21/12/2024 03:00 - United Kingdom - London

Today, I ordered a mountain of junk food for myself on Deliveroo. Embarrassed, I pretended there was other people in the house by yelling, "Food’s here, everyone!" to avoid judgment. The delivery guy smiled and said, "Come on, be honest mate, no one else is in there is there?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 151

You deserved it 637

Messy situation

By Steven Haga - 23/04/2021 04:00 - United States - Milwaukee

Today, I ordered some food and included a slice of cheesecake. However, I think they glued the Tupperware lid together and I didn't actually want to launch the cheesecake into the air when I finally got it open. FML

I agree, your life sucks 807

You deserved it 135

Don't call me Karen

By Anonymous - 24/03/2022 18:00

Today, I was so tired that I thought the item I'd ordered a few months ago had been delivered then stolen, so I emailed the company about it. When I checked back on the website, I realized it hadn't actually been delivered yet and I read the invoice wrong. FML

I agree, your life sucks 578

You deserved it 513

Free advertising

By NotFernMichaels - 28/07/2022 16:00 - United States - Red Lodge

Today, I received a package that I thought contained a textbook for law school, for which I paid $130 used. Instead, I received a paperback novel titled "The Nosy Neighbor" by Fern Michaels. My semester starts next week. FML

I agree, your life sucks 928

You deserved it 123

Where's my shit?

By Still No Phone - 21/05/2017 12:00 - United States - Philadelphia

Today, I checked for the third time this week if my package that 'arrived' five days ago had been found. Not only was it a different employee at the concierge desk, meaning I had to explain everything again, but they told me the same bullshit about how it's "not their fault". The package is my new phone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 785

You deserved it 330

AMAZON!

By Anonymous - 18/01/2024 06:00 - Germany

Today, I went to the pickup location where the email from Amazon said my package was, but they didn't have it. Through order tracking, I then found out that it has been delivered to the wrong location, on the other side of town. This has happened twice in a row now. FML

I agree, your life sucks 512

You deserved it 95

Knock yourself out

By Anonymous - 09/08/2025 20:00 - United States

Today, my package with two brand new toys got delivered to the wrong apartment. Somewhere in this apartment complex, a stranger is either judging me or having the best day of their life. FML

I agree, your life sucks 407

You deserved it 103

Gotta get that delivery dopamine rush

By Anonymous - 06/10/2021 05:00

Today, I've been waiting two months for eight eBay purchases to make it through my country's fucked up customs fiasco. I'm reduced to vicariously sharing in my husband's delivery of a litre of industrial vinegar. FML

I agree, your life sucks 723

You deserved it 142

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The Top

Today, my daughter learned a new song. This would be great, except for the lisp her teacher has. I now have a child screaming about the "itchy bitchy spider" at the top of her lungs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 787

You deserved it 3 232

Today, my wife surprised me with a blow job. Turns out it was a punishment for not doing the washing, as she did it with Chilli powder in her mouth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 269

You deserved it 359

Today, I found a parking ticket on my car. Out of five cars who were in violation of the same infraction, I was the only one who received a ticket. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 438

You deserved it 9 022

Today, at work I had to use the bathroom. I asked my boss to watch my register and quickly walked into the bathroom. I squatted down and peed. A minute later I heard someone ask over our walkie talkie system who was using the bathroom. I had been pressing the intercom button while I peed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 044

You deserved it 13 415

Today, I was called up about a job I'd recently applied for. I was overly excited to tell them I'd be there on Monday. Then I remembered I canceled my car insurance due to financial difficulties. I have no way of getting there. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 444

You deserved it 8 405

Today, despite all I've sacrificed to stay home with my child, and operating a small business while they are in school, my child decided to make a punchline out of me and roasted me in front of the whole family because my husband paid for my car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 407

You deserved it 107