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EvilPotato

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Uranus, Hogwarts
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Saturday 30 May 1981

Evilpotato

I think it's safe to say I have the largest list of fellow FMLers. My favorite people on this site are: Iamnotmyself DocBastard Perdix Flockz KaySL Enonymous Every1luvsboners Dolphinchedder IAmScrubs LiveLaughFML CryMoreFML's ImmaB3AST Freeze Shrike StoryOfTheYear 13FTW Doortje DrDillIonReese Keyman1212 Sirin Alan Quite_Insane Me Me Did I mention myself? I forget. My so- so list consists of: Murdocholmes My hate list on FML consists of: Fighterboy11 haw008 araum365 (for extreme amounts of stupidity)

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Evilpotato

Evilpotato

RedWaters - 06/03/2013 20:20 - United States

Today, my boyfriend started coming onto me, despite me being on my period. He said it was okay, and we went to his bedroom. He told me to spread my legs as he spread his hands. Thinking it'd be sexy, I did. He then yelled, "I AM MOSES! I PART THE RED SEA!" and broke down in laughter. FML

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Hip cats

:(( - 24/06/2012 21:45 - United States - Montevideo

Today, my parents felt the need to lecture me about how people who "smoke the reefer" are a "waste of life" and will never amount to anything. I was baked during the entire conversation, and actually ended up breaking down in tears, because I realized they were totally right. FML

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shittysongs - 07/03/2013 02:39 - United States - Bothell

Today, I was so bored at a dinner party that I went to the bathroom to play games on my phone. One of my co-workers came in, so I rushed into a stall, but forgot to turn my phone's sound off. She heard it and said, "It's OK, music helps me shit too" and started blasting her music and grunting. FML

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Anonymous - 24/01/2012 00:10 - United States

Today, an intoxicated homeless man tried to chase me out of a McDonald's because he thought I was President Obama. I'm a 26-year-old white woman. FML

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Anonymous - 07/03/2013 03:14 - United States - Fort Worth

Today, I met a guy in a bar. He was sweet and funny so I asked him out for coffee later. He quickly turned me down, saying that I didn't even meet his first requirement. His first requirement was "looks like a girl." FML

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