Ariaxena

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Ariaxena's favorite FMLs

Tasty

By chew toy - this FML is from back in 2017 but it's good stuff - United Kingdom - Newcastle Upon Tyne

Today, I went to see my sister and took a couple of dog biscuits for her dog. I forgot about them until later when I realised I had a hole in my pocket, near my crotch. The dog pointed this out by chomping my balls to get to the biscuits. My attempts to remove him resulted in more vigorous chewing. FML

agreeclassic 4 569

vote type 1 968

By Pissy - 27/11/2016 20:15

Today, I was traveling home with my four-year-old son. While we were standing in line at the security checkpoint, I hear the sound of water dripping and turned to find my son urinating on the floor. He'd read a sign that said we weren't allowed to take any liquids with us. FML

agreeclassic 10 397

vote type 1 1 056

By Anonymous - 02/07/2016 19:29 - United States - Greeley

Today, I got threatened with a gun at the drive-thru, all because my coworker forgot to include extra fries in the guy's order. FML

agreeclassic 14 173

vote type 1 1 614

By NordicNathan - 14/03/2016 04:49 - Canada - Burlington

Today, my girlfriend of two months and I are in completely different points in our lives. She ambushed me with ideas of having kids, getting married and being together forever. Currently, my biggest concern is passing the tenth grade. FML

agreeclassic 28 313

vote type 1 2 757

NordicNathan app_comment_confession_title

NordicNathan 14

Wednesday 16 March 2016 22:25

Hey, I'm the author of the FML. So to clarify I just turned 16, she just turned 17 and is in the 12th grade. I've had my doubts about our relationship for a while because of how incompatible we are as people, but her talking about what she wants to name our kids and how cute they will be was kind of the last straw for me. She said "I love you" after our second time seeing each other and after she had already cheated on me, so I definitely hear all the comments about telling her my concerns and/or breaking up with her. But she cries at the drop of a hat and is what I would consider emotionally unstable, this is also the reason I didn't break up with her after she cheated on me. I wasn't raised to make people cry so I tried to be understanding in the situation. She is so bad that she is still crying about her previous boyfriend while telling me that I'm the best boyfriend ever. So I don't know how to break it to her without crushing her. Any ideas?

By Fat Jon - 29/10/2015 19:43 - Mexico - Mexico

Today, I went to a costume contest as Jon Snow from Game of Thrones. I won, which was nice, until I was told that the only flaws in my "Samwell Tarly" outfit were my long hair and wrong sword. FML

agreeclassic 21 756

vote type 1 2 832