•
•
•

Nemesis2747

0

0

4

29

2608

441

Nemesis2747

Nemesis2747 -

Nemesis2747 -

Nemesis2747

lovers5201

fluffypaws...

BettyDowma...

katekate88

lilmizdixi...

Coquelipe

xHEEMxLORD

This_Sucks...

Andrew4787

townyyy799...

Trollx

HarshD9619

BettyDowma...

Nemesis2747

Nemesis2747

Caught in 404pp

danggit3290 - 03/05/2009 17:17 - United States

Today, I was masturbating in the dark with the door open. I thought I saw a figure outside my door, because I didn't have my glasses on. After intensely staring at the dark figure for about a minute, thinking it was my imagination, my stepdad said, "You know, I'm looking RIGHT at you." FML

27 044

89 562

Thanks, I hate it

Anonymous - 06/03/2011 11:28 - Reserved

Today, my husband told me I was lucky to have someone who would love me no matter what my vagina smelled like. FML

45 676

23 006

Anonymous - 06/03/2011 05:18 - United States

Today, we had to discuss our heritage at school. When I told the class that I'm German, Japanese, and of the Jewish faith, my teacher laughed at the "irony." Something like this always happens whenever I tell people my background. FML

39 005

5 549

One simple trick

Anonymous - 07/02/2011 21:14 - United Kingdom

Today, I was on the phone to a guy I really like from work. We'd been talking for about 2 minutes, when he said he was getting another call, and put me on hold. I was so excited to be on the phone with him, it took me a whole 15 minutes to realise he had actually just hung up on me. FML

34 300

7 405

Stormbringer - 01/02/2011 06:37

Today, I realized that someone spray painted a giant black cock on the front of my house while I was asleep. I also just recently painted my entire house yellow. Yellow doesn't cover up black penis very well. FML

33 469

4 120