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Hashtag health goals

By Not that old!! - 26/01/2026 00:00

Today, I’m a retiree who recently joined a gym for the first time. The trainer asked me what my goals were. I said, honestly, “To not fall over.” He nodded and wrote it down. Later I saw my workout plan titled: ANTI-FALL PROTOCOL. Other gym members now ask me how my falling is going. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42

You deserved it 14

I should've known

By I hate it too - 25/01/2026 12:00

Spicy

Today, and every day for the past five months since I got married, whenever my husband and I try to have sex, I think of it as "wifely duties" and it turns me off so much. I can't stop, and we haven't had sex once. My husband is frustrated and angry, and keeps commenting that he should have known this would happen. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38

You deserved it 136

Hot wheels

By Anne - 26/01/2026 03:00

Today, I went to a café that claimed to be fully accessible, as I use a mobility aid. The ramp was technically there but so steep, I needed help. Three strangers helped push me up while I apologized, laughed nervously, and tipped coffee onto myself at the top. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9

You deserved it 1

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The Top

The Top

Today, I put cucumber slices on my eyes to help me relax. I found this very calming till I woke up to ants trying to eat my eyes out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 634

You deserved it 6 561

Today, in my excitement to make some new cards for the postcard exchange I take part in, I apparently spilled my bottle of glue directly into the bag that contains my entire postcard collection. I didn't notice until several hours later. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 679

You deserved it 617

Today, my friend pointed out that I’ve developed crushes on my last two bosses. I didn’t have the heart to tell her that before then, I had a secret crush on a professor back in college, too. Yet, I wonder why I’m single. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 297

You deserved it 575

Today, I went to get my car fixed. There was a vending machine in the waiting room, and I was hungry. The snacks were overpriced, but I still had a little money left over. I noticed a bag of Cheetos hanging loose, so I paid for them, hoping to get two bags. They both got stuck. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 500

You deserved it 10 049

Today, while eating breakfast in a hotel lobby, the woman next to me started playing an obnoxious clip of a baby’s high-pitched crying. The worst part is that my parents refused to let me do anything about it or step away from the loud noise, as they thought it would “embarrass the whole family.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 522

You deserved it 118

Today, I was prioritizing my extreme amount of homework. I read over the front page of my psychology paper seeing that it was pretty easy questions, I decided to do it last. Little did I know there was a 8 page essay on the back of the page. It's 12:19 am. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 737

You deserved it 21 169