Too Much Sugar - FML

Too Much Sugar

By FML Approved - 20/10/2017 22:00 - United States - New York

Sometimes all you can do is sit back and let them get it out of their systems.

agreeclassic 473

vote type 1 111

The rhythm of the fight
Discover all the best anecdotes from the month of January, with or without snow, with or without you. More…

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gobiteme2 34

Saturday 21 October 2017 22:28

when she/he stopped at the top of the stairs, she/he could have stuck a paw out and tripped his ass for running in the house.

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gobiteme2 34

Saturday 21 October 2017 22:28

when she/he stopped at the top of the stairs, she/he could have stuck a paw out and tripped his ass for running in the house.

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Miscellaneous Stalker My ex Coworkers Love Internet Relatable AITA Pokémon Awkward Work Parenting Kids Annoying Shopping Underwear Jealousy Parents Thief Sex Intimacy Suspicious Family NSFW Birthday Gifts I need your advice Accident Abuse Moving home

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Today I woke up with an extremely bad flu and severe nausea. As I rolled around wanting to die I remembered that 4 days prior, I had hoped to get a cold to skip a compulsary carol service for my Catholic school. Now, on Christmas Eve, I just want to say, be careful what you wish for. FML

agreeclassic 6 336

vote type 1 1 751

Today, I left hospital after a three-night stay. Whilst waiting for my taxi to arrive, my mother called me in hysterics wanting to know where I was, because the police had called her and told her I had gone missing. Turns out my doctor "forgot" to tell anyone that I was discharged. FML

agreeclassic 49 597

vote type 1 3 292

Today, I have come to accept that my girlfriend has such obvious daddy issues that I can only turn her on by dressing/acting/sounding like him, but not too obviously because if she realises that’s what I’m doing, she screams, “I do not want to have sex with my dad!” then starts crying. FML

agreeclassic 661

vote type 1 187

Today, I woke up to find that my cat had barfed all over my laptop's keyboard and screen, filling each nook and cranny of the stuff. As if that wasn't bad enough, when I went to make coffee to deal with the stress, I found that I was out of coffee. FML

agreeclassic 681

vote type 1 216

Today, my girlfriend of a month told me that the only thing keeping her from swallowing a bottle of pills is being in a relationship with me, because she doesn't handle breakups well. FML

agreeclassic 33 602

vote type 1 3 039

Today, I joined a work call while rushing breakfast. I muted myself, or so I thought, until my boss asked who was “chomping.” I froze, mid-bite, while everyone waited. My coworker said it sounded “nutritious,” which somehow made it worse. I didn’t speak again. FML

agreeclassic 109

vote type 1 361