Health and Miscellaneous: Today, while sleeping over at my guy friend's house, I woke up...

By Anonymous - 09/12/2009 00:23 - United States

Today, while sleeping over at my guy friend's house, I woke up mid-air after falling off his abnormally high loft bed. Luckily, there was a table and 3 shot glasses to break my fall. FML

agreeclassic 27 646

vote type 1 3 880

Chinese New Year: Dragons and Laughter
Celebrate with stories where tradition and humor meet for a colorful Chinese New Year. More…

Previous FML Next FML

Similar FMLs

By Grant Williams - 07/05/2019 17:37

Today, while mildly tipsy, I threw myself onto my bed at a weird angle and somehow managed to somersault off my bed and land in my clothes hamper. FML

agreeclassic 1 263

vote type 1 823

All over the place

By nemi - 31/08/2010 22:33 - Norway

Today, I was out having a beer with a few friends. After getting a pint, I slipped in a puddle of beer, fell on top of a stranger on the sofa, and knocked my beer upside down on my head. Then, completely soaked, I realized I'd also knocked over the table, spilling its content on a poor girl across it. FML

agreeclassic 27 691

vote type 1 8 854

By Caution - 02/10/2018 22:00

Today, at a house party someone smashed and spilled their drink. In my own drunken state, I decided to get the mop as someone might fall. I then fell over it and ended up with glass in my side. FML

agreeclassic 2 212

vote type 1 600

Joe Smooth move

By Karel - 24/09/2024 14:00 - Canada

Today, I was at a friend's party and tried to lean casually against a wall while talking to someone. I missed the wall and ended up stumbling backwards into the punch bowl that was atop the coffee table. FML

agreeclassic 226

vote type 1 364

You played yourself

By anon - 25/03/2013 18:31 - United States

Today, I got so drunk that I tasered myself in the balls as a joke, fell down my friend's porch stairs and rolled out into the street. FML

agreeclassic 12 121

vote type 1 68 707

By Anonymous - 31/05/2012 19:03 - Canada

Today, I drunkenly staggered home and crashed on the couch. When I woke up I realized it wasn't my house. FML

agreeclassic 12 641

vote type 1 34 469

Panic!

By Lotje13 - 01/01/2012 00:19 - Hungary

Today, I was sleeping over at a friend's house. I went and took a shower, and as I tried to get out, the door jammed. I called my friend for help, and after much tugging, the glass shattered all over me. She panicked and sent her dad to rescue me. It was the first time he and I had met. FML

agreeclassic 29 819

vote type 1 2 622

By Anonymous - 28/08/2019 00:01 - Australia - Darwin

Today, I woke up in the shower at my coworker's house, with my clothes on and soaking wet. Apparently, the night before I drank too much and punched my best friend. The sad part is, I passed out on the couch, but somehow ended up in the shower, facing the wrong way. FML

agreeclassic 572

vote type 1 1 914

Occam's razor

By anonymous - 12/02/2011 05:48 - Canada

Today, I woke up in the middle of the night to get a glass of water. Groggy and disoriented, I bumped into several pieces of furniture and made a lot of noise. My dad woke up, mistook me for a burglar, and knocked me out with his fist. FML

agreeclassic 34 838

vote type 1 4 726

By Anonymous - 02/03/2018 19:30 - United States

Today, I woke up after being sick from the flu and tried to get out of bed. I forgot I was in a bunk bed and broke my ankle in the fall down. FML

agreeclassic 4 348

vote type 1 860

amy397123 0

Wednesday 9 December 2009 12:18

Was it necessary to mention that he was your "Guy friend"?

SenGaeriel 3

Wednesday 9 December 2009 9:12

Ouch

Comments

PrincessesCrown 17

Monday 26 December 2011 13:35

Now I want a bowl of Frosted Flakes Cereal

loser_lover95 9

Tuesday 13 March 2012 3:11

Damn.

sexiSugarplum 0

Saturday 24 March 2012 8:39

Drinking last night eh?

GimmeFive 10

Wednesday 11 April 2012 21:02

Loft beds Amazing, gotta love um

str1kepa1n 16

Thursday 5 September 2013 3:18

Did you die? Kiddin, relax...

drew60 11

Friday 19 September 2014 9:54

Breaking shot glasses #partyfoul

Cyrus00 41

Friday 12 February 2016 0:36

Hopefully the shot glasses didn't break. Then you could've poured yourself one to numb the pain.

LostDN 9

Wednesday 9 March 2016 0:30

"Friend"

VDM sur Facebook

Keywords

Miscellaneous Stalker My ex Coworkers Love Internet Relatable AITA Pokémon Awkward Work Parenting Kids Annoying Shopping Underwear Jealousy Parents Thief Suspicious Sex Intimacy Family NSFW Birthday Gifts I need your advice Accident Abuse Moving home

Top

Today, my boyfriend of 2 months got upset and frustrated with me because he had yet to meet my mom. I'd told him on our first date that she passed away 4 years ago. FML

agreeclassic 55 723

vote type 1 3 623

Today, I refilled a water glass I'd left out on the counter and took a long drink. At the end, I felt something spongy and panicked. When I spit it all out into the sink, a huge centipede was staring back at me. FML

agreeclassic 3 648

vote type 1 727

Today, I walked in on my son trying to carve a bong out of a watermelon. FML

agreeclassic 46 443

vote type 1 7 852

Today, I got an email from my professor with my grade for a paper. It said, "Solid writing, but you should have proofread your final draft more carefully." In a moment of annoyance, I typed in the reply box, "God should have proofread your FACE more carefully." My elbow hit the send button. FML

agreeclassic 16 752

vote type 1 68 593

Today, I finally invited my girlfriend over to meet my oddball parents. The first words out of my dad's mouth were, "So, you're the silly girl who agreed to date my dickhead son." It went downhill from there. FML

agreeclassic 49 784

vote type 1 6 945

Today, at work in a library, I found a dirty diaper stuffed under one of the public use computer desks. Not only was it leaking, but it had been run over several times by a rolling office chair. I had to clean it up. FML

agreeclassic 41 691

vote type 1 2 817