Intimacy: Today, in public, a homeless guy looked me in the eyes and started...

By scarredforlife - 16/06/2013 23:27 - United States - Brooklyn

Today, in public, a homeless guy looked me in the eyes and started wanking. FML

agreeclassic 54 531

vote type 1 5 045

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Oh, hai Mark!

By scarredforlife - 12/02/2016 09:00 - New Zealand - Palmerston North

Today, I experienced one of those moments in life you never forget. I walked into a homeless man masturbating in a parking garage stairwell. FML

agreeclassic 23 413

vote type 1 1 835

By Anonymous - 11/06/2012 20:30 - United States

Today, I got a new pair of glasses, and was driving home. While waiting at a stop sign, I noticed a homeless guy touching himself. He saw me, smiled and waved, and then continued. So much for my new eyesight. FML

agreeclassic 28 685

vote type 1 2 810

By meesmees - 23/11/2013 10:48 - United States - Severna Park

Today, I ended up talking to a homeless man and bought him a meal. In return, he hugged me and groped my ass. FML

agreeclassic 43 830

vote type 1 6 815

By ThoroughlyCreepedOut - 07/03/2010 00:22 - United States

Today, while in a public restroom, a man entered the stall next to me and began vigorously wanking. He finished quickly, but as he was leaving he peeped in at me through the crack in the stall door. FML

agreeclassic 26 372

vote type 1 2 255

Nice day for it

By peachykeen - 15/02/2016 01:05 - United States - Savannah

Today, the most action I had on Valentine's day was a homeless guy pulling his dick out at me as I walked home from work. FML

agreeclassic 23 089

vote type 1 1 935

What a jerk!

By traumatized house keeper - 08/09/2017 13:00 - Germany - Munster

Today, while cleaning the hostel, I had to make some beds in a dorm room. There were three guys in the room, one of whom was sitting on a bed. He looked me straight in the eye and I gave him a big smile before I realized he was jerking off. FML

agreeclassic 4 503

vote type 1 433

By ssjfml - 11/08/2015 14:56 - Denmark - Copenhagen

Today, while enjoying the nice weather in a park, I opened my eyes to the sight of some guy jacking off, half-hidden behind a tree. FML

agreeclassic 25 316

vote type 1 2 005

By trolls have hit the gutters - 17/02/2015 18:23 - United Kingdom - Durham

Today, a homeless guy told me I looked like shit and to have some self-respect. Right. FML

agreeclassic 30 636

vote type 1 4 637

By Anonymous - 15/03/2015 03:02 - United States - Lake Forest

Today, while having sex with my boyfriend, some homeless person came up to the window and started doing a voice-over. FML

agreeclassic 38 505

vote type 1 13 982

By NoNaMe - 04/06/2009 08:07 - Australia

Today, while walking down the street, a homeless man walked up to me. He opened his mouth to say something and I immediately said that I didn't have any spare change because I was late for work. He then said "I was gonna ask you for the time, dickwad". Apparently he wasn't homeless. FML

agreeclassic 10 643

vote type 1 75 225

red_headforlife 15

Monday 17 June 2013 9:01

GET OUT. FAST.

expertsmilee 26

Monday 17 June 2013 9:01

Staring contest with a twist it would seem

Comments

WeskersSexslave 15

Friday 28 June 2013 9:35

better run before he comes closer!

Solitarydude 13

Monday 19 August 2013 10:06

quite possibly one of the most disturbing mental images I've ever received right here.

OhGawdItsMe 6

Friday 9 October 2015 15:11

Still a better love story than twilight

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Miscellaneous Stalker My ex Coworkers Love Internet Relatable AITA Pokémon Awkward Work Parenting Kids Annoying Shopping Underwear Jealousy Parents Thief Sex Intimacy Suspicious Family NSFW Birthday Gifts I need your advice Accident Abuse Moving home

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Today, I put my AC in my room again in preparation for summer. However, I forgot that my cat messed up the accordion while climbing the window like an idiot, so it no longer closes properly. So there is now an opening in the window that I can't do anything about. Hello, insects. FML

agreeclassic 307

vote type 1 181

Today, I gathered both mine and my girlfriend's families secretly to a restaurant. I paid the restaurant to play romantic music, and paid for the best table available. As soon as we finished our meal, our families gathered around and I proposed. She laughed and said no way. FML

agreeclassic 105 350

vote type 1 8 812

Today, my grandma commented on my Facebook profile picture: "That's a great photo! It doesn't look anything like you!" FML

agreeclassic 40 024

vote type 1 3 697

Today, this girl I liked made her Facebook status "Nobody texts me anymore, message me numbers?" I commented that I texted her. She deleted it and changed it to "Nobody that I care about texts me anymore, message me numbers?" FML

agreeclassic 44 139

vote type 1 4 016

Today, a girl-scout asked me to buy cookies, in front of Giant. She looked nice, so I bought 5 boxes from her. She took the money and went home with her mom. I opened the boxes when I got home and realized that the boxes just had rocks in them. I got scammed by a girl-scout. FML

agreeclassic 237 696

vote type 1 39 142

Today, I came home after being stuck in traffic needing to pee really badly. When I went to the bathroom, my boyfriend was on the toilet. I couldn't hold it longer, so I went into the woods behind our house and found a bush. Relieving myself, my butt started to itch. I was sitting in Poison Ivy. FML

agreeclassic 1 586

vote type 1 535

Similar FMLs

Oh, hai Mark!

Nice day for it

What a jerk!

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