Today, I learned that after saving my virginity for the guy I've... - FML

This is a Nearly FML. It’s an FML, nearly. It got positive votes from the users, by wasn’t approved by our team.

By TheUntouchable - 07/12/2017 17:13

Today, I learned that after saving my virginity for the guy I've fallen in love with, he won't date me, or touch me, because Im still a virgin. He still thinks I'm " super attractive" though. FML.

I agree, your life sucks 121

You deserved it 15

Valentine's Day: Love and Maladresse
Discover romantic anecdotes with a touch of awkwardness - because nothing expresses love better than a little discomfort! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Top comments

jbuckets_404 38

Friday 8 December 2017 18:57

OP, so where do you live? ;-)

jbuckets_404 38

Saturday 23 December 2017 13:15

My use of ;-) in this instance is of the playfully teasing, tongue-in-cheek variety, not the "seriously, let's get it on right now" version. Next time I'll append an "lol" to make it obvious, ok? :D

Comments

jbuckets_404 38

Friday 8 December 2017 18:57

OP, so where do you live? ;-)

PhantomCrevan 8

Tuesday 12 December 2017 9:11

Congrats on automatically landing yourself in the "creep" bin. Seriously, joking or not, that sort of thing tends to freak women out because of... a lot of reasons.

jbuckets_404 38

Saturday 23 December 2017 13:15

My use of ;-) in this instance is of the playfully teasing, tongue-in-cheek variety, not the "seriously, let's get it on right now" version. Next time I'll append an "lol" to make it obvious, ok? :D

ellenmellon 6

Friday 8 December 2017 19:31

Ditch him

FML on Facebook

Keywords

Miscellaneous Stalker My ex Coworkers Love Internet Relatable AITA Pokémon Awkward Work Kids Parenting Annoying Shopping Underwear Jealousy Parents Thief Intimacy Suspicious Sex Family NSFW Birthday Gifts I need your advice Accident Abuse Moving home

The Top

The Top

Today, I was on a three hour flight to Los Angeles for a corporate meeting. The woman next to me instantly fell asleep and snored louder than a freight train, while the kid behind me made a hobby of thashing my seat from behind. When I peered over and asked him to stop, he spat in my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 763

You deserved it 3 492

Today, I was trying to exercise to lose weight but I got terrible bloating. Turns out that’s a common response, because the body thinks it’s being stressed. This is right after being diagnosed with allergies to some vegetables. I’m trying to be healthy, I swear. My body won’t let me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 950

You deserved it 113

Today, I started watching porn in my room with the volume muted. A minute later, my dad knocked on the door, so I closed everything and called him in. He just said, "Son, you disgust me." and walked out. Now I'm too paranoid to use my own computer. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 670

You deserved it 15 013

Today, I kindly asked my boyfriend to shave his pubic hair to make oral sex more enjoyable for me. He declined, saying, "Think of it as flossing your teeth. I'm doing you a much needed favor." FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 711

You deserved it 5 882

Today, we were at a friend’s birthday party and it was time to sing Happy Birthday. My crush was there. Wanting to impress him, I started out-singing everyone with runs and riffs. Someone said, “It’s just Happy Birthday, it’s not that serious, wannabe American Idol.” Everyone, including him, laughed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 265

You deserved it 2 370

Today, I got home from work and heard the shower in my bathroom running. Thinking my wife was taking a shower, I got completely undressed and walked in. My wife wasn't in the shower. Instead, I found my daughter and her boyfriend in the shower, making out. There was an awkward moment of silence. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 284

You deserved it 10 370