Miscellaneous: Today, I finally achieved the perfect hourglass figure. Too bad...

By Wwiimaniac - 25/06/2012 14:05 - United States - Dallas

Today, I finally achieved the perfect hourglass figure. Too bad I'm a guy. FML

agreeclassic 26 259

vote type 1 5 519

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By random - 08/06/2013 04:42 - United States - El Paso

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By Anonymous - 12/12/2010 20:32 - United Kingdom

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By bride - 14/02/2011 06:24 - United States

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By notfatanymore - 13/11/2011 20:50 - Germany

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By BrefODM - 13/06/2014 03:15 - United Kingdom

Today, thanks to an efficient diet, I reached my target weight. Unfortunately, my chest has disappeared. My boyfriend suggested we have a funeral for my bras. FML

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Overthinking it

By omgreally91 - this FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I spent an hour photoshopping my face onto super skinny models as inspiration for a diet. FML

agreeclassic 11 684

vote type 1 30 713

dankpotatoes 2

Monday 25 June 2012 18:51

Don't complain. Most girls would kill to be your size!

redreynard 14

Monday 25 June 2012 18:57

I just like hourglasses.

Comments

drayloon 50

Friday 19 October 2012 6:13

i know that feel. girls are jealous of my body tho lol

ncbb14 13

Wednesday 7 November 2012 5:59

Fag

angeljade1234 22

Sunday 25 January 2015 0:39

Guys can be curvy too

bingum200 3

Wednesday 3 June 2015 5:10

Are you Violet Chachki?

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Today, I was trying to fall asleep. Unfortunately, my next-door neighbor's baby began to cry. I closed the window and rolled over, unable to hear the crying anymore. My dog's hearing is better than mine, and so he started barking. Goodbye, good night's sleep. FML

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Today, an old woman came into my store for help. Towards the end, she asked me my name. I told her while pointing at my name tag. She then replied, "Oh! I didn't notice since I was staring at your boobs. Much prettier to look at." Sadly, this is the first time I've been hit on in months. FML

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Today, my boyfriend left me. He said he can’t be with someone who agrees with their parents politically. My parents are liberals, and I happen to have done my own independent research, and still agree with them. FML

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Today, my girlfriend broke up with me because I forgot it was her birthday. We had only been dating for 2 weeks. I didn't even know when it was. FML

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Today, I had a dentist appointment. While waiting, I pulled out my Cosmo magazine to entertain myself. The woman sitting across from me points and tells me I'm reading "Satan's Manual." I told her I don't believe in Satan. She said, "You'll know he's real when you become his bitch!" FML

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Today, I dropped my phone in the toilet in a public restroom. That would have been bad enough, without the guy in the next stall saying, "Jesus! What the hell did you eat?!" FML

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