Work, TMI Health The longest monologue

The longest monologue

Anonymous - 29/11/2012 00:57 - Canada - Belleville

Today, I was waiting in a doctor's office when I was approached by an elderly woman. She told me all about the ripping of her stitches in a very private place, in exhaustive detail. Of course, today was the day my doctor chose to be an hour late. FML

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What do you mean, lady?

ihateoldmagazines - - United States

Today, I went to the doctor's office for an appointment. After waiting for ages, I asked the receptionist what the delay was. Apparently, I had no standing appointment today. This is coming from the same receptionist who checked me in nearly two hours ago. FML

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babs - 07/05/2013 19:07 - United States

Today, I was in the doctor's office waiting for my husband to arrive, when a little old lady sat beside me. She seemed nice, until she started farting and blaming it on me. They weren't silent; they sounded like trucker farts and smelled like death. I was there for over an hour. FML

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bouncekitty - 20/02/2011 17:04 - United States

Today, I had all of my wisdom teeth removed. After the anesthesia wore off, I asked how long the procedure took, and the nurse told me a little less than an hour. Apparently I thought this was hilarious and started laughing, which ripped my new stitches. FML

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Anonymous - 05/07/2009 23:20 - Canada

Today, I had to be go to the ER after I fell on a rake. After having stiches put in, my Mom wanted me to go to the store with her. My friend saw me at the store and thought it would be funny to rip off the band aid because she thought I was hiding a zit. She ripped out my stitches. FML

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Time's up

f u doc - 30/09/2020 17:01 - United States

Today, I had two different doctor's appointments with different specialists at the same hospital. Doctor #1 kept me waiting so long doctor #2 refused to see me. I tried to explain I was in the building and why I was late, but he wouldn’t hear it. I’d already waited 4 months for these appointments. FML

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johnny121 - 01/01/2010 19:14 - France

Today, I had to go to the hospital. While I was there, my mom started hitting on a doctor. Later I saw them making out in the room next to me. FML

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WTFFAIL - 03/12/2012 05:06 - Canada - Montreal

Today, while getting a hernia exam, I accidentally ran my fingers through my doctor's hair. FML

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Gasman - 15/07/2017 15:30 - New Zealand

Today, I was sitting in the doctor's waiting room and thought that I was alone. I let rip two massive farts before realising there was a very short woman behind the computer screen at the desk. FML

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It's all too much

Anonymous - 09/01/2022 19:01 - United States - Steele

Today, I took a day off from work for a doctor's appointment. It ended up taking a lot longer than I expected, because while I was on my way, my mom called to inform me that my great aunt passed away this morning. As a result, I showed up extremely late and was berated. And the worst part? It's my birthday. FML

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N/A - 25/09/2012 04:13 - Canada - Edmonton

Today, I went to my gynecologist's for a check-up. After the doctor checked me I went to the bathroom. It turns out the walls aren't soundproofed, because I could hear the doctor telling his assistant, "God! How did she ever find a husband?" FML

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Chanti_fml 26

Thursday 29 November 2012 8:38

For these moments Steve invented iPods and earplugs!

KrazieKleo 13

Thursday 29 November 2012 9:10

What does this have to do with respecting an elder? More like respect someone's personal space..

DocBastard 38

Thursday 29 November 2012 12:44

We ALWAYS make people wait so we can watch your behaviour and learn about you. That's right, we have hidden cameras in our waiting rooms! Hahah...er... You know I have to kill you all now. Please line up to the left.

NicaLovesDisney 17

Thursday 29 November 2012 16:02

Is a bullet the correct prescription here doc?

chrissy2 28

Monday 3 December 2012 16:26

If you are going to kill us, could you at least prescribe us morphine? Thanks.

Krysstinia 2

Thursday 29 November 2012 12:44

She was probably lonely and appreciated that you listened to her.

buckdharma 37

Thursday 29 November 2012 13:33

After mugging people $20 at a time, she could finally afford her descending cooter operation.

leahmae88 7

Thursday 29 November 2012 15:44

My question is; why was an elderly woman's ****** stitched closed? I mean the dust bunnies couldn't of been that bad...could they!

Dcm210 19

Thursday 29 November 2012 16:56

Big people are bitter for some reason.

chuckcloninger 12

Thursday 29 November 2012 18:02

They are called "legs". You use the to get up and move. (After excusing yourself if you feel the need by saying "Gee, I have to go to the bathroom".).

ellytoad 13

Thursday 29 November 2012 22:42

Not if it means potentially missing the appointment.

lolfood 24

Thursday 29 November 2012 18:04

You're*

martin_martian7 11

Thursday 29 November 2012 20:57

Oh god.

loveistwisted 10

Thursday 29 November 2012 21:07

Must have been my mom. ._.

Therewhenneeded 16

Friday 30 November 2012 0:55

She was probably desperately lonely and just wanted to share what was probably the most interesting thing to happen to her. Sucks to have to listen to it but personally I would have grinned and born it simply to be polite and possibly make an old woman's day.