Scary, Cute and Kids: Spooky - FML

Spooky

By BadgerSpirit - this FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I woke my husband up at 2 a.m., screaming that there was a badger in our bedroom. We both screamed for a bit until he finally said, "What are we screaming about!?" I took a second look at the badger, and realized it was my four-year-old daughter with her blanket. FML

agreeclassic 16 003

vote type 1 44 228

Christmas: Snowy Joys and Blunders
Enjoy Christmas stories where unexpected gifts and family reunions create lasting memories... and fun! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Similar FMLs

By Zack - 01/04/2012 21:36 - United States - Duncannon

Today, I woke up to shuffling noises coming from downstairs. Suspecting the worst, I jumped out of bed, and whispered over my shoulder for my girlfriend to stay quiet. Only after going downstairs and taking a swing in the dark with my bat did I figure out it was just my girlfriend foraging for snacks. FML

agreeclassic 11 756

vote type 1 26 538

Spooked

By Anonymous - 20/10/2024 11:00 - United Kingdom

Today, I was trying to sleep when I saw a head looming from the darkness with no eyes and a mouth open like a silent scream. I just froze and pissed myself. It was my daughter wanting to cuddle with us. Alas, the bed was wet, so she got put back in her bed, while we had to share the sofa downstairs. FML

agreeclassic 336

vote type 1 279

By Anonymous - 11/03/2013 23:32 - Ireland

Today, my 4-year-old daughter couldn't sleep, crying that her teddy bear wants to eat her. My husband thought it would be funny to put the bear right in front of her face while she slept. She's now terrified to sleep anywhere but in our bed. FML

agreeclassic 36 726

vote type 1 6 580

Yikes

By AAAAAAAAAAAAA - 11/07/2022 07:00 - United States - Steele

Today, I heard a scream that sounded suspiciously like my cat when he's just had a nightmare or is otherwise in a state of extreme distress. I found him chilling on my couch, so I walked back to my room, when I heard the scream again. I ran back and he was still chilling. It was my neighbor's son screaming outside. FML

agreeclassic 761

vote type 1 151

By Anonymous - 12/01/2010 07:45 - United States

Today, around 2:00 a.m. I had just sat down on my couch when I noticed one of my cats poking at what appeared to be a toy. I attempted to pick it up to play with the cat when it started to move like a mouse. I squealed like a girl and woke up my wife upstairs. I'm a 26-year-old man. FML

agreeclassic 11 241

vote type 1 23 794

Prank wars

By Divorcemenow - 17/07/2009 22:02 - United States

Today, I awoke to my husband donning a gorilla mask in the middle of the night. My kids have been staying in a tent out back for the past few nights, and have complained of a "monster" scaring them. I told them that it was their imagination. My husband says he gets a kick out of it. FML

agreeclassic 50 662

vote type 1 6 976

By Anonymous - 15/12/2012 15:55 - United States - Amsterdam

Today, I ran into my infant daughter's room because I thought I heard her crying, and found she was still sound asleep in her crib. The screams were coming from the mouse our cat was using to paint her bedroom walls. FML

agreeclassic 32 022

vote type 1 2 503

React content

By fmlfmlfml - 02/06/2009 18:03 - United States

Today, I was taking a nap. Apparently, my two year old daughter decided to crawl on top of the covers on my bed because she was scared since there was a thunderstorm. I thought she was one of our cats so I kicked her off. She hit the wall. FML

agreeclassic 96 993

vote type 1 252 090

Baby fever

By SkeetinKeaton - 06/05/2013 06:29 - United States

Today, I woke up to the sound of my newborn screaming. I frantically hopped out of bed and stumbled into the nursery where I was met by the priceless sight of my five-year-old daughter attempting to breastfeed her understandably frustrated little brother. FML

agreeclassic 71 423

vote type 1 6 568

By lon01t - 07/05/2012 20:43 - United Kingdom - Falkirk

Today, my four-year-old daughter started screaming and lashing out at me as I was getting her ready for a bath. It seems my idiot husband told her she was still small enough to be feasted on by the "drain monster". FML

agreeclassic 28 318

vote type 1 2 651

Next

TOP COMMENTS

ceddyz17 10

Wednesday 27 April 2011 18:49

a badger? is she that hairy

Awahso 25

Wednesday 27 April 2011 18:53

Wow, self esteem boost for her

Comments

jenna5960 7

Thursday 28 April 2011 5:46

Why would a badger be in your bedroom?

stroudie94 9

Thursday 28 April 2011 6:06

The most bad ass animal in the world.. the honey badger!

IscoreOnU 19

Thursday 28 April 2011 6:23

Out of anything that could have been in there. You say badger...?

Sha41491 0

Thursday 28 April 2011 6:26

this is hilarious!!!!!'

Evy359 0

Thursday 28 April 2011 6:48

That is really creepy... if your daughter was there not making any noise while you two were screaming.

katesaba1022 0

Thursday 28 April 2011 7:15

Lmao!!!

itzfriday 0

Thursday 28 April 2011 7:16

u guys r both retards

finndandy 0

Thursday 28 April 2011 7:37

lmfao!!! Shiiiit that is effing funny!!!

IbanezSprinter 0

Thursday 28 April 2011 7:55

that poor child

7th_fml 3

Thursday 28 April 2011 8:42

Shucks, I see the Badger Badger Badger jokes have already been taken up.

5
6
7
8
9
10
11
12
13

VDM sur Facebook

Keywords

Miscellaneous Stalker My ex Coworkers Love Internet Relatable AITA Pokémon Awkward Work Kids Parenting Annoying Shopping Underwear Jealousy Parents Thief Intimacy Suspicious Sex Family NSFW Birthday Gifts I need your advice Accident Abuse Moving home

Top

Top

Today, while doing my boyfriend's laundry, I noticed that every single pair of his boxers had a poop smear in them. He's almost 30. FML

agreeclassic 501

vote type 1 104

Today, I got permission from my parents for my boyfriend to stay over. Things got intimate, and I tried my hardest not to make too much noise. However, while having a post-sex cuddle, we heard my parents in the next room muttering about my "faking". FML

agreeclassic 22 651

vote type 1 45 083

Today, for the seventh weekend in a row, I left my weekly visit with my long-distance boyfriend unsatisfied. Seems he enjoys getting shit-faced drunk more than he enjoys getting a boner. FML

agreeclassic 23 288

vote type 1 3 904

Today, it was my birthday. My only birthday present was a cake that my dad bought from Walmart. Well, it sure looked tasty. The only problem: it had nuts on it. Guess what I'm highly allergic too? At least my dad told me he'd "tell me how it tastes." FML

agreeclassic 1 930

vote type 1 152

Today, at Walmart, I unknowingly chose the only non-automatic door to exit through. I stood in front of the door looking for the motion sensor while the greeters laughed at me for at least half a minute before I saw the "PUSH" sticker. FML

agreeclassic 991

vote type 1 901

Today, I taught a high school class on public speaking. When I explained how important it was for a presentation to be polished and professional, one kid asked, "Is it professional for your skirt to be tucked into your underwear? I didn't know they made My Little Pony panties for adults." FML

agreeclassic 5 301

vote type 1 2 212