Love, Weird, Awkward, Cooking Pizza Sounds like a keeper

Sounds like a keeper

Anonymous - 11/04/2013 15:42 - United States

Today, my boyfriend of 2 weeks said that he was going to cook me dinner. After waiting for the frozen pizza that he decided to make for me to be completely cooked, he said, "Oh I hate this part", reached into the oven with his bare hands and took out the pizza, all while screaming. He is 24. FML

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Chinese New Year: Dragons and Laughter
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burned - 24/05/2009 13:44 - United States

Today, my boyfriend was cooking me dinner. He walked away and I decided to help by giving the pan of veggies a sautee flip. My boyfriend failed to mention that he had just pulled that pan out of a 500 degree oven. FML

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Pizza > Love

Anonymous - 11/07/2025 12:00 - United States

Today, I leaned in to kiss my boyfriend goodnight at the door. He smiled sweetly, cupped my cheek… and then used his other hand to pull the last slice of pizza out of my hand and slam the door shut. FML

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Sick burn

Anonymous - - United States

Today, my boyfriend came home while I was making a snack in the kitchen. We started making out and he lifted me up and sat my ass on the hot stove. FML

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Sounds like a keeper

ManChildBF - 03/03/2022 18:00 - United States - Loveland

Today, my boyfriend came home and demanded dinner. I started suggesting things, but he threw out that we should just fend for ourselves. I made pasta and offered him some, but he decided to throw a fit and go to bed at 6:30pm without dinner. He then woke up at 9 to complain he was hungry, then slept on the couch. FML

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Run, run away pronto

Anonymous - 22/01/2021 08:01

Today, my fiancé yelled at me after I got off the phone with my friends, because I said I hadn't felt this happy and hadn't laughed this much in a long time. He was also mad that I didn't cook him dinner. He didn't ask me to cook dinner for him. He then told me to go somewhere else if I'm not happy with him. FML

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We'll just order out

Lili - 22/03/2025 09:00 - United States - Akron

Today, I cooked dinner for my boyfriend, hoping to impress him with my culinary skills. I burnt the garlic bread, overcooked the chicken, and managed to set off the smoke alarm three times. When I finally served the meal, my boyfriend said, "It's like a sad buffet at a middle school prom." FML

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Give me a break

anon - 18/02/2023 06:00

Today, I burned dinner because my girlfriend was yelling for me to help with a trivial problem. To salvage things, I ordered pizza. She spent the rest of the evening moaning that I ruined dinner, that we don't eat healthy, and that I "make us" waste money on food. FML

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Prince Charming

muskogee - 20/09/2019 16:00

Today, my boyfriend wouldn’t stop smacking and slurping his food. I told him to at least chew with his mouth closed. He looked me dead in the eye, with a mouth full of chewed up pizza, and said, “No.” FML

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fatgirl - 16/05/2010 04:08 - United States

Today, I was eating pizza with my boyfriend and my friends. I was laughing and talking and went for another piece when my boyfriend grabbed my wrist and said that I had had enough. My friends all backed him up. FML

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AprilFlowers - 01/12/2009 17:15 - United States

Today, I woke up early and made my boyfriend french toast. When he woke up, he yelled at me because it was his dish day and I was creating more dishes for him to do. He made me do the dishes. FML

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laurenlovesjb 20

Thursday 11 April 2013 18:48

Does he have potholders or oven mits? If he does and just doesn't use them, he's stupid. If he doesn't have them, he's still stupid. Who does that?

olpally 32

Thursday 11 April 2013 18:49

You can't fix stupid. My god... Don't breed with him.

afragilesheep 12

Friday 12 April 2013 17:11

Okay. We can see that he is lacking brains. What I want to know after reading this an many other FML posts is why this guy even has a girlfriend. What makes a guy like this attractive?

Sonotsuave 35

Saturday 13 April 2013 2:43

Haha wtf? um moron doesnt begin to describe it....hopefully he, um, yeah no i cant think of an excuse for him sorry dump his ass

Thatshortchick14 0

Saturday 13 April 2013 4:27

You, my friend, have found yourself a dumbass

stevothedevo 25

Saturday 13 April 2013 7:37

Cab money $20, frozen pizza $6, watching a dumbass burn his fingertips off... Priceless.

babeababe 16

Saturday 13 April 2013 9:38

He had to have just been trying to shock you. Or make you laugh. Get some kind of reaction. Looks like it worked! Haha! Unless there really is a small chance that he's actually that stupid. In that case, you might want to reconsider dating him.