Parents, Dad jokes, Argument Kids Mystery

Mystery

Waheyyy - - United Kingdom

Today, I was arguing with my dad. I called him a geriatric fool. He replied with, "Well at least I know who my biological father is." I have no idea if he's joking. FML

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Chinese New Year: Dragons and Laughter
Celebrate with stories where tradition and humor meet for a colorful Chinese New Year. …

confsused - 16/12/2013 17:49 - Canada - Toronto

Today, I found out that my dad is actually my uncle, and vice-versa. FML

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He's got game

Anonymous - - United States - Salt Lake City

Today, I horribly lost a game of basketball against my dad. It wouldn't have been so humiliating if he hadn't been piss drunk at the time. FML

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Sneaky

Anonymous - - Canada - Owen Sound

Today, I caught my dad sneaking a drink of whiskey outside, shortly before my wedding. I asked if he was seriously getting drunk at a time like this. He looked at me and scoffed, "It's the only way I'm gonna get through this stupid shit." FML

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bbbeast - 28/07/2009 02:42 - United Kingdom

Today, my dad asked me if I'd started smoking, I gave him a big speech about how I never have and never will. Two hours later, he found my stash of cigarettes under my bed. FML

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Slippery when wet

blewidstepr -

Today, I realized that my 3 year-old son, who is being potty trained, has better aim standing up to pee than his 30 year-old father. FML

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Foreshadowing

JB. - - United States - Somerset

Today, while my husband and I were arguing, he walked away in the middle of my sentence yelling, "Remember babe, you're only my current wife!" FML

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Yada yada yade

Anonymous - - United States

Today, while waiting for my mom to pick me up from university, I took out my phone and pretended to talk to someone. I didn't think people still pointed and laughed, but apparently they do when your mom pulls up and shouts, "Stop pretending to talk to someone." FML

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Devious

rachel - - Germany - Köln

Today, my little brother told me to give him my phone so he could play a game on it. I said no, because I was taking a call from a friend at the time. He then walked over to the wall, headbutted it, burst into tears, then told my parents that I punched him. They believed him. FML

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Trauma for life

he's still not convinced - - United States

Today, while visiting my mother, she asked my son who his favorite parent was. As a growing boy, he chose his father. I don't mind, except she then asked, "So, whose side are you taking in the divorce?" My husband and I have no marital issues. My son refuses to believe us. FML

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Very funny, Mom

ThanksMa - - Canada

Today, my mother and I walked past my boyfriend, whom she's never met. After we casually greeted each other and went on our way, my mother said, "He's cute. Who is he?" I paused for a second and replied, "That's my boyfriend." She then said, "Does he know that?" FML

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Anonanimal 0

Monday 7 September 2009 23:05

he's just trying to bug you. you wouldn't believe the things my parents have said to me in arguements xD

Suckylicious 0

Monday 7 September 2009 23:06

my dad says im adopted all the time. i think im his kid. i just dont care that much!

ohhhhman 0

Tuesday 8 September 2009 5:34

YDI for being so condescending and rude to your own dad. I wouldve said you were adopted, too. For his sake, I hope you are!

Xaviara 0

Tuesday 8 September 2009 5:39

I can tell you were raised by him even if he isn't your biological father. You both seem extremely immature. You might know what geriatric means and he thought you said genetic or something but really? Why would you act like a five year old? Grow up dude.

soccerfreak009 0

Tuesday 8 September 2009 6:32

your fault for using the term geriatric fool and actually considering it an insult. you sound pretty "geriatric" yourself

zpicci 0

Tuesday 8 September 2009 6:47

omg that is ****** hilarious. I want your dad to be my best friend. ydi for thinking your life is ****** because your dad has an awesome sense of humor

yisrab 0

Tuesday 8 September 2009 7:19

THE REAL PLEXICO IS WITH LOWER CASE p

were_giraffe 2

Tuesday 8 September 2009 12:43

YDI for calling your dad a geriatric old fool

blastvortex 3

Tuesday 8 September 2009 16:14

Damn, that sucks. It sounds like mommy got around. Also, "geriatric fool?" Gimme a break. You should've called him a "senile, old coot." At the very least it sounds a little better.