Health, Painful Injury JESUS CHRIST! - FML

JESUS CHRIST!

rubmytummy - 10/06/2009 21:12 - United States

Today, I was helping my church clean up a park. I was given a sledgehammer and told to break up a concrete picnic table so we could haul it off. About halfway through, I swung the sledgehammer REALLY hard, completely missed the table, and hit myself in the shin. FML

58 830

23 362

Chinese New Year: Dragons and Laughter
Celebrate with stories where tradition and humor meet for a colorful Chinese New Year. …

PlsForget - 18/08/2016 21:47 - Canada - Vancouver

Today, I was volunteering at a neighborhood house tutoring a bunch of kids. Everything was going fine until one of them jumped on the table I was at, which broke and hit my knee. I swore in front of all the kids and my volunteer coordinator. FML

13 678

1 301

Self report

Bonk - 04/02/2024 08:00 - United States

Today, my clumsiness reached a whole level when I hit myself in the face with a hammer hard enough for blood to come out. FML

388

199

Dumb, but relatable

Maju - 31/10/2019 04:00 - Netherlands

Today, I hit my toe against a table. Out of frustration, I kicked the table and broke my little toe. FML

553

2 758

You're grounded!

Break A Leg - 08/08/2022 14:00

Today, I accidentally slammed my leg against the coffee table. It was only after I went to the bathroom a few minutes later that I realized there's now a massive gash on my upper leg. I also got in trouble for yelling, "SON OF A BITCH!" as soon as the impact occurred. FML

783

141

Accidents will happen

Anonymous - 27/04/2009 05:58 - United States

Today, at work, I managed to hit myself in the face with a large sheet pan. The force made me back into a shelf, which knocked a box off the top, which hit me in the head and knocked me out-cold. I now have a fat lip, a sore head, and bruises all over from the fall. FML

43 025

9 314

Jopes - 10/05/2009 12:44 - United States

Today, I cut down a dead tree in my yard. The top hit the ground and the base seesawed up in the air and came down on my head. I hit the ground like a sack of flour. Fortunately, the wood was rotted and soft. Unfortunately, the chainsaw was still running. 28 stitches in my calf. FML

83 738

13 721

Always wear protective gear

Anonymous - 06/06/2020 14:02

Today, while nailing a board down, I hit my thumb with the hammer. As I reached to console my throbbing finger, I dropped the hammer on my foot. When I went down to hold my foot, I smacked my head on the board. Now I've got a concussion, a smashed finger, and a bruised foot. FML

1 672

701

Dumpstered

KO: - - United States

Today, I was changing the garbage at a local fast food place where I work. Being a rather short guy, I had to lean back and fling the full, heavy bag at the top. I did so with such force that my head hit the dumpster, knocking me out. FML

39 969

5 256

Feeling real worked out

Anonymous - 11/03/2025 11:00

Today, the lights went out at the gym while I was holding a heavy bar. I tried to put it back on the rack, missed, and dropped it on my toe. Then, as I was limping around in pain, I hit my head on one of the other bars on a rack at head height. FML

460

102

ARE YOU ******* SORRY?

Evelyn - 19/03/2012 20:18 - United States

Today, I was at the park with my friends. We were all having fun on the swings, when out of nowhere I heard a thud, followed by a child crying. Turns out I accidentally kicked him in the head. FML

27 525

7 910

Poonheart 0

Thursday 11 June 2009 2:02

That must have shattered your shin... -.-

justxmyxluck 0

Thursday 11 June 2009 2:06

I'm cringing just reading this. Well at least you didn't hit your crotch. That would just about kill you. =/

TheEpicPies 15

Thursday 28 June 2012 17:23

Reminds me of Thor. Lol!

gingerface81 16

Monday 31 March 2014 4:38

Oh my, I have many feels for you OP

imnotanybody 2

Wednesday 9 July 2014 9:44

I hope you're better now after 5 years

NemusKiller 5

Tuesday 22 July 2014 0:48

Where's the "you're an idiot" button. Lol jk

getfokinrektm8 9

Monday 6 July 2015 18:45

sledgehammers already have enough power that you dont really have to swing hard

carbonbasedcynic 17

Monday 24 August 2015 2:32

holy shit how did you not break your own shin? or did you?!! TO BE CONTINUED!!

Miscellaneous Stalker My ex Coworkers Love Internet Relatable AITA Pokémon Awkward Work Parenting Kids Annoying Shopping Underwear Jealousy Parents Thief Sex Intimacy Suspicious Family NSFW Birthday Gifts I need your advice Accident Abuse Moving home

Today, I’ve had to spend $300 out of my savings account for my doctor's appointment to get another 90-day supply. Health insurance is way too expensive, as I'm a student and work part time, and haven’t had luck in finding a job. How am I supposed to save for a car in the meantime? FML

803

163

Today, while chopping green chilies, I accidentally rubbed my eyes. It currently feels like Satan pissed hellfire straight into my right eye. FML

12 063

4 886

Today, I ruined my computer screen trying to kill a fly. FML

12 577

41 947

Today, and for the last two weeks I have been preparing my girlfriend for a break up with nasty remarks. She has been finding me exceptionally funny. FML

8 337

40 764

Today, my girlfriends dared me to answer the door naked to the cute pizza delivery guy. He laughed it off and thanked me for the awesome tip. An hour later, police arrived because my nosy, frigid, couldn’t-get-laid-in-a-brothel neighbour reported me for public indecency. FML

2 817

1 616

Today, I fell asleep in my math class. Turns out I sleep walk. I woke up at the front of the room with chalk in my hand, scribbles on the board behind me, and the whole class laughing at me. FML

32 643

8 433