Bodyshaming, Farts Transportation It wasn't me

It wasn't me

Banana - - Puerto Rico

Today, I was riding the train and someone farted. Everyone looked at me. People always blame farts on the fat guy. FML

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Chinese New Year: Dragons and Laughter
Celebrate with stories where tradition and humor meet for a colorful Chinese New Year. …

sleeper - 02/03/2010 05:05 - France

Today, I was on the train when I fell asleep. Everything would have been fine but I was suddenly jerked awake by the very loud sound of my own fart, followed by the stares of many strangers. FML

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WhatsThatSmell - 25/02/2011 13:25 - Australia

Today, I took a busy train into the city. I was lucky enough to get a seat. People were forced to stand in the aisle in front of me, and the person directly opposite me, whose butt was level with my head farted in my face. Twice. FML

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Kat - 08/11/2008 07:51 - France

Today, everyone thought that I was the one who farted in the lift. FML

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Anonymous - 18/12/2015 13:34 - Sri Lanka - Colombo

Today, I accidentally farted while on my flight home. It was silent but so deadly that several people were visibly distressed. The overweight guy sitting next to me got a bunch of dirty glares. I was too ashamed to own up to it. FML

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Stealth bomber

Jogger - 19/08/2020 14:01

Today, I was standing in line at a coffee shop when the guy stood behind me let out a huge fart, then walked away. The rest of the line turned around, thinking that it was me. An old lady started to lecture me about being rude, while the guy who did it laughed behind his mask in the corner of the shop. FML

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Anonymous - 07/12/2010 04:53 - United States

Today, while sitting on the bus a stranger sat next to me, farted, put his hand under his butt to smell what it was like, and then sniffed it throughout the whole ride while glancing at me. FML

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On the down low

Anonymous - 31/07/2024 06:00 - United States - Milwaukee

Today, during a long flight, I tried to discreetly pass gas. Instead, I misjudged the pressure and ended up making a loud noise that everyone around me seemingly heard. To make matters worse, the flight attendant asked if everything was OK. Now I’m probably remembered as "Farts on a plane." FML

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Own it!

- 19/03/2024 16:00 - United States

Today, while standing in line at the store, I thought I could let a small fart slip and blame it on the guy behind me. I did it, then turned to glare at him in disgust, only for him to turn and yell at the crowd, “This bitch farted, not me!” FML

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Emmy - 02/10/2011 06:36 - United States

Today, while I was on the up escalator, a small woman in front of me farted directly into my face. FML

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kykynevs - 23/08/2011 07:14 - United States

Today, while at the grocery store an elderly woman farted very loudly next to me. Everyone in the aisle looked our way. The woman pointed at me, and left the aisle. I received many disgusted looks from children and their parents. FML

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Cainicide 5

Tuesday 4 December 2012 18:54

"What the **** you looking at?!" People will stop staring, and big guys are intimidating.

ICastillo 24

Tuesday 4 December 2012 18:56

Well Op since everyone is already blaming you might as well let them go. Bombs away.

redmonkey224539 9

Wednesday 5 December 2012 9:54

Day feels

Sarah123321 4

Wednesday 5 December 2012 10:45

That stinks! Bad pun, i know. Shut up:(

AliceLockehart 18

Wednesday 5 December 2012 11:02

Reading this made me giggle like a little girl cause I pictured my Dad doing that.. Your Dad sounds awesome :)

The_F3rris 11

Wednesday 5 December 2012 14:45

Thats why when you have to fart you go stand behind larger people. Its a great cover.

mandyville 8

Thursday 6 December 2012 7:03

Was it you though lol

AriSwagg 9

Thursday 6 December 2012 22:00

Awe :(

lng0004 2

Friday 7 December 2012 20:42

You can always say "**** whoever just farted".

nuggetman213 0

Saturday 8 December 2012 14:25

Well at least big guys are better to snuggle with >(^.^)>

pinkpanther61789 15

Tuesday 11 December 2012 5:18

You could always just blame the person who falls asleep in class

crispy76 10

Friday 9 August 2013 3:19

stop being fat

Miscellaneous Stalker My ex Coworkers Love Internet Relatable AITA Pokémon Awkward Work Kids Parenting Annoying Shopping Underwear Jealousy Parents Thief Intimacy Suspicious Sex Family NSFW Birthday Gifts I need your advice Accident Abuse Moving home

Today, I got home from school after having been in a fight. I looked to my father and asked him for advice; he said, "Go see your mother." I go to see my mother, and she says, "Go see your father." FML

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Today, as I was riding my bike, I saw a bunch of cute guys checking me out. Not paying attention, I then ran into a parked police car. Besides getting laughed at, I got a ticket for damaging police property. FML

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Today, and for a while now, my phone has been autocorrecting "I love you" to "I lobsters." My girlfriend almost believes I have some sort of a seafood fetish. FML

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Today, I woke up with a bloody nose and my lamp next to me in bed. Apparently I grabbed the cord of the lamp and yanked while I was sleeping, and it fell on my face. The worst part? My boyfriend saw it was going to happen, but didn't stop me because he thought it would be funny to "see my reaction." FML

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Today, I put my phone in the dishwasher by accident. I'd left it on the kitchen counter with a bunch of dirty stuff and, distracted, loaded it in with the plates. I only realized it when the dishwasher started making weird noises. My phone was soaked and blinking with bubbles inside. It didn’t survive. FML

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Today, my ex showed up to pick up our kids in her brand new car. Last month child support doubled my amount because of a paperwork error. FML

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