Love, Dating Miscellaneous Heavy rotation - FML

Heavy rotation

shescomfortablynumb - 05/06/2009 07:49 - United States

Today, I had a third date with a great guy. Over dinner, he told me that he wanted to see more of me. When I agreed, he pulled out his schedule book and started to tell me he was dating 5 other women besides me. He then told me what week in the "rotation" would be mine. He wasn't kidding. FML

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Chinese New Year: Dragons and Laughter
Celebrate with stories where tradition and humor meet for a colorful Chinese New Year. …

Last dates

Anonymous - 19/06/2020 17:00

Today, a guy I've been dating for a year asked me to meet him for dinner and a couple of drinks. After dinner, he confessed that he's been seeing another woman and has decided he wants to seek a relationship with her. He then told me how sex with me is great, but he didn't want me to continue being "the other woman." FML

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bootycall:( - 15/02/2017 13:00 - United States - Oxnard

Today, I went on what I thought was my fifth date with a guy. We finally got intimate and it was amazing. As soon as it was over, he said : "Sorry babe, I should get going. I have a date tomorrow and I'd hate to be tired for it." FML

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lamesauce - 15/02/2009 10:32 - Canada

Today, I went on a coffee date with a guy I'm interested in. He picked up his phone mid-date to finalize dinner plans with another girl. FML

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newmoongirl1036 - 13/07/2015 02:03 - United States - Chicago

Today, I went on a date with a guy that I really like. At the last minute he informed me a friend would be tagging along. To keep his friend from being a third-wheel, I kept up a conversation, and managed to piss my date off. He thought I would be a better match for his friend. FML

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First dates suck

Anonymous - 03/09/2019 16:00

Today, I went on two dates from a dating app. The first one said halfway through that we couldn't date because it would break his contract. The second one catfished me. This is why I have multiple dates in one day. They never end well. FML

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Eloise - 21/03/2017 14:00

Today, I went on my third date with a great guy. We finally got round to talking about his tattoos. All 57 are related to his best friend. All of them. The best friend he never stops talking about. Somehow I don't think this will work out. FML

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What the hell is even that?!

Anonymous - - United States - Lake Forest

Today, I went on what I thought was a date. After a wonderful night with a perfect gentleman, he told me how excited he is that he's moving in with his girlfriend next week, and thanked me for reassuring him that he doesn't want anyone but her. FML

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Unlucky - 25/07/2012 13:03 - United Kingdom - Birmingham

Today, I went on a fifth date with a guy, and he asked me if we could be boyfriend and girlfriend. Just after I said yes, he pulled out a contract and asked me to sign on the dotted line. FML

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Meanwhile, in 1953…

nope! -

Today, I had my first date in more than two years. As soon as I sat down, the first words out of his mouth were, "How many people have you had sex with? Not just recently, but ever. I don’t date women who’ve had more than 5 partners." I left before we'd even ordered drinks. FML

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Time to skedaddle

Anonymous - 29/08/2023 18:02 - United States - Queens

Today, my boyfriend told me he wants to date other people, but still wants to be with me. He said, “Yes I want to be with you, but maybe we can both find better.” I found out he’s been texting another woman. FML

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may_cause_fail 0

Friday 5 June 2009 16:28

...At least he's organized? D:

absent_toast 0

Friday 5 June 2009 16:31

Wow. You should continue dating him and see if you win.

Foxy_On_Fire 21

Saturday 27 February 2010 9:39

omg he is a straight up player and you just gave me a great idea for a plot for fanfiction thank you.

Foxy_On_Fire 21

Wednesday 31 March 2010 12:59

I just wrote the fml one shot. it great!!!

Drummer389000 0

Wednesday 9 June 2010 20:49

punch that little prick in the face!

Volcan_fml 22

Friday 2 July 2010 14:23

So what? He's dating around. it's not like you're glued to 'im.

confusdsincbirth 5

Saturday 2 October 2010 6:33

dont date ******?

angel55033 12

Friday 19 November 2010 8:00

at least he was honest I guess

Dillonjjohnson 0

Wednesday 15 December 2010 5:18

wow what a jerk. at least it was only the 3rd date.

dirkes 0

Monday 2 May 2011 8:35

wat a pig

juicebox244 0

Thursday 8 September 2011 6:43

Dude that's genius! But horrible...

djjaxon2001 4

Saturday 8 October 2011 2:48

Well he's a bitch lolz. Hope da things get better

LilToonchiii 0

Saturday 24 December 2011 8:01

keeping his shit together.

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Miscellaneous Stalker My ex Coworkers Love Internet Relatable AITA Pokémon Awkward Work Parenting Kids Annoying Shopping Underwear Jealousy Parents Thief Suspicious Sex Intimacy Family NSFW Birthday Gifts I need your advice Accident Abuse Moving home

Today, after months of ultrasounds and blood tests, I found out that the pain I've been feeling in my ovaries is actually just sore muscles from flicking my bean every night. FML

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Today, I got so tired of my friends constantly pestering me about having a girlfriend that I downloaded Monika After Story. Now when they ask, I just say she's long-distance and values her privacy, so I can't show her to them. This is what my life has come to. Forever alone. FML

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Today, I learned what live maggots in chocolate cake taste like. FML

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Today, I'm getting over a nasty breakup, and decided to treat myself and order a pizza online. After waiting 45 minutes, I checked the site. Turns out, I'd forgotten to change the address on the site. I sent my ex a free pizza. FML

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Today, I went to a Dodger game with my crush. Between innings, the "Kiss cam" came up on the big screen. The camera happened to land on us, and when my crush saw us on the screen, he leaned away from me and buried his face in his hands. Everyone saw, and sympathetically said "Awww." FML

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Today, I finally quit my job after talking with a friend about making our own design/multimedia company. While I was on my way to his house, he called me and told me not to quit because he got an awesome job offer and couldn't refuse. FML

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