Intimacy Freedom

Freedom

Lovejunkie - 01/03/2010 07:30 - United States

Today, after finalizing my divorce, I decided to go out with a guy I had been ogling for months, after much anticipation and a few rounds of drinks at the bar, I was ready to roll. Much to my disappointment, his penis was so small the condom wouldn't stay on. FML

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The rhythm of the fight
Discover all the best anecdotes from the month of January, with or without snow, with or without you. …

stillkindahorny - 13/09/2011 05:51 - United States

Today, I finally had sex with the guy I've been seeing. It took him longer to put the condom on than it did to finish. FML

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Small guy

no luck chuck - 09/10/2021 02:00 - United States

Today, I knew I was a small guy and finally about to get laid for the first time in years. Everything was going great, until she got my pants off. She stared at it, stared at me, stared back at it and said, "Yeah, that’s not gonna happen." Got dressed and left. Sadly this has happened many times. FML

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Username - 16/04/2011 08:39 - United States

Today, I went on my first official date I've been on since my divorce. Things were going great until he ordered his fourth 32oz beer; he got hammered and became a horny octopus. Oh, and he farted whiled trying to give me a goodnight kiss. FML

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Ummm - 03/08/2016 19:45 - United States - Wheaton

Today, I was on a second date with a guy. Things got a little handsy and he pulled down his pants to reveal a micro-penis. He then smiled and asked me to be his girlfriend. FML

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Quickshot

anon - 31/08/2014 15:14 - United States

Today, while finally about to make love with my long-term boyfriend, he came from putting a condom on. FML

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Tiny Tim

hmmmm - 13/08/2012 12:19 - Australia

Today, the condom slipped off, because my boyfriend refuses to admit that he needs to use smaller condoms. FML

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Let down

Anonymous - 23/12/2021 17:01 - United States

Today, I visited a friend out of state. We've been flirting for months and decided to fool around at night. He was very loving and attentive, but... he'd bragged about his dick being 6 inches and it ended up being not only thin, but very short. So thin and short that I couldn't really feel it. FML

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Is that it?

Better not - 24/01/2018 20:00 - United States - Kenai

Today, while on vacation with my boyfriend, I decided it would be a good time to try getting intimate with him for the first time. It turns out his penis is so small that I get more enjoyment from a tampon applicator. We're stuck in this cabin for another five days. FML

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Small is beautiful

dickless wonder - 21/10/2023 10:00

Today, I met up with a girl I've been hanging out with a bunch recently. She said that we should be a couple, "unless you have a micropenis", then laughed. I actually do have a micropenis. I couldn't hold it together, and ran out of the bar, crying. FML

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Bad start

fuck but no fuck - 02/08/2013 19:44 - South Africa - Pretoria

Today, I finally felt ready to make love to my boyfriend for the first time. It all went great, until I tried putting the condom on him. In the process, I managed to nick his penis not once, but three times with my nails. His eyes brimmed with tears and he completely lost his erection. FML

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moonshine_bek 2

Monday 1 March 2010 16:05

I don't care what anyone says, when it comes down to situations like this; size does really matter folks!

Neotoxx 5

Monday 1 March 2010 16:05

LOL I feel bad for that guy

gagglius 0

Wednesday 17 March 2010 4:31

i believe asian size would be a good size in this situation

XxHardcorexFMLxX 0

Thursday 18 March 2010 6:27

wow that's funny I'm gonna agree size does matter

clairdnj 0

Thursday 1 April 2010 5:05

frocher=FAIL

lovingmybabyjade 0

Wednesday 21 April 2010 9:11

HAHA omg I've had that happen to me too...except i couldn't stop laughing the entire time....I was drunk but he was a very nice guy just the whole small penis thing didn't work for me in the end

Charlotteeexx 0

Thursday 22 April 2010 0:18

why's everyone being so rude about Asians?I'm not Asian but WTF is everyones problem? I've never seen an Asian dick but I bet it's bigger than any of you racist people's.

upintheorange 5

Friday 21 May 2010 13:31

97-go Shane Dawson!!

fakeaccountX 6

Wednesday 9 June 2010 5:10

Awwww....Maybe that's karma from your ex-husband for divorcing him. Was his dick bigger than this new guy's?

yolie_fml 0

Wednesday 14 July 2010 16:13

144- but it's okay for dudes to judge a girl on the size of her ****, right? Don't be a hypocrite... Sometimes too small is just too small... and it goes both ways...