FML's Showdown #14 By Louis - 21/06/2017 21:30 Another stand off, pick your fave! I agree, your life sucks 321 You deserved it 126 Share Tweet Share
Today, I was doing target practice with my new paintball pistol. One of the bullets missed, and hit my new neighbor's house. I went up to the door to apologize, not realizing I was still holding the paintball gun. My ex-soldier neighbor thought I was robbing him and put me in a chokehold. FML I agree, your life sucks 21 883 You deserved it 41 911
Today, when he came back to bed, I asked my flatmate who I've been sleeping since the start of lockdown, whether he had washed his hands after going to pee. He said he barely touched his dick, so he didn't need to. He likes putting his fingers in my mouth when we have sex. FML I agree, your life sucks 1 692 You deserved it 713
Today, I found out my best friend has been stealing hundreds of dollars from me and my fiancé. My wedding is tomorrow morning. Guess who my best man is. FML I agree, your life sucks 35 705 You deserved it 2 849
Today, due to medication I am taking that causes constipation, I have become all too accustomed to using a disposable rubber glove to dig crap out of my own butthole. FML I agree, your life sucks 27 185 You deserved it 2 430
Today, I found out my wife is pregnant. The problem is she convinced me to get a vasectomy two years ago. FML I agree, your life sucks 48 530 You deserved it 3 973
Today, at work, my boss made me go outside and wash people's cars for free. I work at Verizon. FML I agree, your life sucks 46 709 You deserved it 4 451
I like #1