Poopoo peepee, Alcohol, Drunk Weird Boozed up

Boozed up

speechless - 13/07/2013 14:32 - United States - Mitchell

Today, I woke up to a strange noise. I looked over to see my drunk husband standing at the dresser. I asked him what he was doing. "Peeing." I asked him, "In the sock drawer?" There was a pause. "Am I peeing in the wrong drawer?" FML

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Stinky - 20/11/2011 10:23 - United States

Today, at 2am, I heard a strange sound coming from the hallway. I walked over, only to discover my drunk boyfriend pissing in the closet. On my favorite shoes. FML

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jessefonsexy. - 07/12/2010 11:08 - United States

Today, I was trying to go to sleep when I heard my sister come home from the bar. I fell asleep and woke up an hour later to see my sister squatting in my dresser drawer. I asked her what she was doing and she said "I'm peeing." FML

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Wait for the hangover

Carpet cleaner - 21/02/2012 02:15 - Canada

Today, my husband came home late from drinking with his buddies, only to toss and turn and keep me up for an hour. He then sat up and didn't move for a few minutes. I sat up to see what was wrong, only to see him pissing on the carpet beside our bed. FML

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Party animal

Anonymous - 16/09/2020 02:04

Today, my husband woke up, tried walking to the bathroom, fell down, got back up and started peeing on the carpet. I’ve never seen him this drunk before. FML

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Mom! Stop!

Anonymous - 07/08/2019 16:00

Today, I woke up to my drunk mom trying to pee in the dresser drawer of our hotel, with my clothes in it. I woke up right in time to yell at her. Pants down and all. She started denying there were even clothes in there. FML

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gp28 - 18/02/2010 20:08 - United States

Today, I woke up to hear my boyfriend drunkenly crashing around in the living room, after peeing in an ashtray because he thought it was a urinal. FML

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Dude, gross!

juggalo2 - 17/04/2024 03:00 - United States - Troy

Today, I came out of the bathroom and caught my husband peeing against a tree in the backyard. I told him how disgusting that was. He said, "Fine. Back to peeing in the sink." FML

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Giving

nt121511 - 03/08/2016 22:40

Today, I woke up after a long night of taking care of my drunken husband. I guess I should feel lucky I don't have a generic, "He wet the bed in his sleep" story, and instead have a unique, "He got out of bed and peed on me" story. FML

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Drunken antics

Anonymous - 10/12/2020 11:02 - Canada - Sherbrooke

Today, I woke up to the sound of my boyfriend full-on peeing into our tiny trash bin. The trash bin was basket material, so the pee was all over the floor. Once he'd finished, he went to bed, passed out and left me to clean it all up. FML

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WTF dude?

MyS3lf - 19/04/2011 02:33 - United States

Today, I woke up to a strange sound that sounded like a lot of water being poured into a sink. It was actually my father in law using the bathtub as a toilet. He's staying with us, and is showing no signs of leaving any time soon. He thinks this is acceptable behavior. FML

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softrally 15

Saturday 13 July 2013 18:45

What drawer was he intending to pee into? O.o

_GoodGuy 11

Saturday 13 July 2013 18:45

That would "piss" me off.

RoboCunnilingus 23

Saturday 13 July 2013 19:53

Of course, #20, gosh. I bet you don't know there's a poop dresser either.

Obey_StudBoii 23

Saturday 13 July 2013 20:04

Now tell him to go out and buy you new socks along with a new dresser. Problem solved

CooperRage 13

Saturday 13 July 2013 20:06

My boy was "sleep peeing" for a while. Couldn't just "sleep walk."

lylotrezor 20

Saturday 13 July 2013 20:11

Oh, come on. I know he was drunk, but you just KNOW what drawer you're supposed to pee in.

KiddNYC1O 20

Saturday 13 July 2013 20:39

Are you Lois Griffin?

kristabelli 19

Saturday 13 July 2013 20:40

I really hope he was sleepwalking, OP! My husband did that once into a bowl which was beside the bed. I was SO mad at him; it took him awhile to convince me he was asleep and thought it was the toilet.

razzledazzle21 23

Saturday 13 July 2013 20:52

55 - He was drunk, I'm sure that's why he did it!

Futacy 29

Saturday 13 July 2013 20:56

He sounds drunk as hell.

AshleyScruggs 14

Saturday 13 July 2013 21:30

Do you have a therapist?

courtz94 24

Saturday 13 July 2013 21:36

Well he is drunk, so it's to be expected that he'd so something stupid. Most people do when they're drunk. Some just do worse things than others. Clothes can be washed.