By FML Approved - 13/07/2017 18:30 I agree, your life sucks 512 You deserved it 149 Share Tweet Share
Today, I saw an elderly lady fall over in the street. Nobody bothered to do anything, so I went over and helped her up. Instead of thanking me, she called me a pervert and slapped me around with her cane. FML I agree, your life sucks 17 178 You deserved it 1 208
Today, I received a package labeled “Confidential.” Excited, I opened it in front of my coworkers, thinking it was a PR gift. It was the new toilet seat I'd mistakenly sent to my work address instead of my house. FML I agree, your life sucks 79 You deserved it 456
Today, as I started my car, I heard the most horrific sounds coming from the engine. When I lifted the hood I realized I'd found my son's cat. FML I agree, your life sucks 51 582 You deserved it 4 592
Today, my mother told me she's disappointed in me for not going to a better college, and that if I was in the top ten of my class that the rest of those ten must be really dumb. Fact is, I threw away the acceptance letters to Carnegie Mellon and Cornell because I didn't want her to have to pay. FML I agree, your life sucks 28 097 You deserved it 42 684
Today, while handing out business cards to promote my new dog grooming business, I stopped to talk to a potential client. She let me get all the way through my 15-minute speech, before bothering to tell me she didn't have a dog. FML I agree, your life sucks 28 428 You deserved it 13 205
Today, my sister decided to wake me up by pumping handwash into my open mouth. FML I agree, your life sucks 34 050 You deserved it 3 521
Those aren’t the droids I’m looking for.