By ashleigh_anarchy - 21/02/2012 01:05 - Australia

Today, someone actually thought it was appropriate to compare my mother's death to the death of their cat. FML
I agree, your life sucks 36 310
You deserved it 3 369

ashleigh_anarchy tells us more.

ashleigh_anarchy 7

Just to follow things up. It has only been a month since she passed away. She was pretty much my best friend. She had been sick for all of my life and I looked after her for as long as I remember. In the last three months she was completely bedridden. She was a very strong woman and was expected to live 20 years less than she did, but I absolutely couldn't believe it when she died because of how much she carried on and of course I cared about it more than anything. It was the hardest thing I've ever experienced, and am still experiencing. The cat in question was a stray cat, and I posted this because why the **** would I post an FML on the day she died? I can tell you now I was doing a lot more important things. This is my reaction to an idiot one month later, who said 'Sorry about your mum. I know how you feel, my cat died'. Nothing should be more important than the relationship with your mother. If you never got to have a good relationship with yours, I'm very sorry. But yeah, I have lost pets and I was distraught but NOTHING can compare. If you haven't lost a close parent, you can't imagine.

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Top comments

Pentium_4 27

that's terrible. i'm sorry OP. some people don't put things into perspective

95 10

Comments

ashleigh_anarchy 7

Just to follow things up. It has only been a month since she passed away. She was pretty much my best friend. She had been sick for all of my life and I looked after her for as long as I remember. In the last three months she was completely bedridden. She was a very strong woman and was expected to live 20 years less than she did, but I absolutely couldn't believe it when she died because of how much she carried on and of course I cared about it more than anything. It was the hardest thing I've ever experienced, and am still experiencing. The cat in question was a stray cat, and I posted this because why the **** would I post an FML on the day she died? I can tell you now I was doing a lot more important things. This is my reaction to an idiot one month later, who said 'Sorry about your mum. I know how you feel, my cat died'. Nothing should be more important than the relationship with your mother. If you never got to have a good relationship with yours, I'm very sorry. But yeah, I have lost pets and I was distraught but NOTHING can compare. If you haven't lost a close parent, you can't imagine.

15 1
saksxalmo 20

#176-- If they really can't imagine what you're going through, they probably didn't know any better. You shouldn't take it so personally, this person probably didn't know what to say and was just trying to be sympathetic. It wasn't an appropriate comment to make, obviously, but it's not fair to call him/her names or assume that because your mother's death was extremely hard for you that other people don't also have their own problems. I'm going to get so many thumbs down for this. *sigh*

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perdix 29

#176 I'm sorry for your loss. I was lucky enough to not have a death in my family until I was 25. Until then, I had no reference except the death of a pet. I think this person was trying to do the best he or she could to console you. It may be hard, but you should give this person the benefit of the doubt. By the way, we have the same birthday.

21 2
MissHayleyJames 7

I am really sorry for your loss, but there are definitely more important relationships out there than just with your mother to many many people. Sure I love my mom and will be devastated when she dies and we have a good relationship, but she's not my best friend like my dogs or my horses are and she's not my husband or my children. I don't think it's really fair of you to call someone an idiot just because they value the life of a pet more than you do. Again, sorry for your loss and that she had to go through all that, but it doesn't make someone an idiot.

2 2
KingAdrock 16

The point isn't that a relationship with a pet cannot possibly be as strong as one with a person. The point is while that CAN be true, 99.99% of the time it isn't. It's simply not reasonable to assume that that the death of your cat is the same as the death of someone's immediate family member. ...But to nonchalantly claim so to someone who is grieving, when you don't even know any details about their relationship with the person who died is just beyond the pale. This guy isn't just an idiot, he's a thoughtless asshole!

12 7
MissHayleyJames 7

King I guarantee you that your claim that 99.99% of the time a relationship with a pet isn't as strong as with a human is false. Maybe for you it's true, but there are a lot of people in this world who do value their pets as family and it will be a bigger deal when those pets die than some family member they're not close to. I know I have a stronger relationship with my dogs and my horses than I do with most people and I'll be devastated once they die.

1 1
KingAdrock 16

You guarantee that my claim is false... because it happens to be false in your case? Cool anecdotal evidence bro. But even regardless of whether my claim of 99.99% is overstated, you're ignoring the point that the person who said this to OP *DIDN'T* have such a connection with the cat. It was a stray cat they didn't even own.

1 11
Ilovemusic237 19

I'm really sorry OP. My Daddy died when I was in sixth grade, and one day in seventh I was upset and telling someone who I thought was my friend about it and she literally responded with, "So? My dog died." You just have to ignore those people and not seek refuge in them. I'm very sorry for your loss and I hope that you get to feeling better.

3 0
SpeakOutLoud 1

That's not fair at all. Animals are just as much a part of family as humans are. That cat's deqth was probably even more tragic than the death of your mom!!

5 58
Mearemoi 14

Oh my gosh, how in the world can you think that? If YOUR mother/father died, would you be more upset about their death or about the death of your pet? Her mom died for ***** sake - show some respect!

17 2
Mademoiselle_fml 34

Speaking of situation, not value. If the mother had passed quietly in her sleep while the cat got ripped to pieces by a dog, well then you know the answer. I personally believe both are terrible deaths to go through. It's just a matter of how close you are to them.

2 11
chessdude 8

omg how does this not have more dislikes

1 0
Ilovemusic237 19

I hope with all of my heart that OP doesn't read that comment.

0 0
razzledazzle21 23

I'm sorry for your loss, OP. My boyfriend always compares the death of my dad to the death of his dog, so I feel your pain.

3 2
rileypopo1 0

Why does everyone compare a dead dad to a dead dog

1 2
STEALTHYBUNNYY 0

okay, well to some people. they get extremely attached to their pets and they become one of the family, so maybe OP. felt as if the cat was acting as a best friend role and she lost the best friend

2 1
sarahbear430 0

Don't take it personally, I know losing your mother is horrific, but some of us have never lost a parent or family member, so we actually use the loss of a pet to express our empathy. It may not seem like it, but the intensions behind it are good. Sorry for your loss.

1 0
ellepants 2

I wouldn't be mad at her though, her intention was good. And it doesn't matter how attached someone is to their pet. in a situation like this, its not very considerate unless op is a pet lover person. which op obviously is not. oh yea, I LOVE dogs! but did I verbally compare my boyfriends fathers death to my pomeranians death? No,because he wouldn't understand,and I'm not THAT attached to pets anyways. but I understand a lot of people are and that's ok, just watch who you're comparing death to with, its a touchy subject to begin with! sorry bout your mom!:(

2 1
BlackBlazeCobra 16

The death of a pet can be as painful as losing a family member, depending how long you've had said pet and how close you were to it. I recently lost my cats to a house fire, one for which I've had for more than half of my life. It's hard to think about her without tearing up still. Whether its a human or an animal, the pain of losing a loved one is the same.

1 0
emmy462 3

As much as I love animals...this happened to me once. When my sister died, I came back to school a couple weeks later and someone tried to say "I'm so sorry....I just lost my cat and it's been really hard." WTF?? I thought to myself. The intentions were probably good...she was trying to show empathy. Still really pissed me off at the time though. So I know how you feel. Sorry for your loss :(

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Nikkisha16 0

Some people are just too insensitive. Sorry OP.

0 1