Intimacy: Today, my girlfriend thought it would be sexy to stick her finger...

By Anon. - 01/03/2011 23:51 - United States

Today, my girlfriend thought it would be sexy to stick her finger up my ass during sex. I screamed like a little girl and barely managed to finish. Afterward, she said, 'Now you know how it feels.' FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 632

You deserved it 91 093

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Same thing different taste

Finger wagging

By Anonymous - 16/12/2024 14:00 - United States - Edison

Today, my normally-prudish girlfriend grabbed my crotch and said, "I want you to fuck me like I've never been fucked." I obliged. She loved it, until after we'd finished, when she decided that she felt "cheap, gross, and used" and started a huge fight. FML

I agree, your life sucks 686

You deserved it 131

Are you experienced?

By Brax - 30/05/2012 09:46 - United States

Today, my girlfriend stuck her finger up my butt while giving me a hand-job, promising it would feel really good. It just felt awkward and made me need to poop. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 284

You deserved it 9 430

Girl boss

By dating walter white's gf apparently - 06/04/2013 19:13 - United Kingdom

Today, while going down on my girlfriend, I finally managed to give her an orgasm. During that orgasm, she tore out a clump of my hair, causing me to scream in pain. She scowled and said, "Ah shut it, ya little bitch." FML

I agree, your life sucks 59 167

You deserved it 13 433

Submission

By Anonymous - 24/11/2019 18:00 - Canada

Today, my girlfriend and I were having sex. I thought I'd be spontaneous and spice things up, and gave her a spank across the butt. She started crying. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 527

You deserved it 1 930

What what?

By Anonymous - 12/04/2022 16:00

Today, my boyfriend stuck his finger in my butt and I liked it, but I can’t ever tell him that or he’ll get that smug look on his face like, “I told you so, let’s have anal now.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 518

You deserved it 1 498

Sensitive snowflake

By onepussytwopussy - 07/03/2014 19:47 - United Kingdom - Birmingham

Today, my boyfriend and I had sex for the first time, and I tried to be sexy by raking my nails down his back. I guess I did it a little too hard, because he shrieked in pain, leapt off me, and limped around the room cursing and whimpering. Mood ruined. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 450

You deserved it 26 543

Really heavy sleeper

By Anonymous - 17/12/2021 01:01 - United Kingdom

Today, my girlfriend revealed that last night she decided to 'test how asleep I was' by putting her finger up my nose as far as she could. Then in my mouth. Then in my ear. Then back in my mouth. I slept through the whole thing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 915

You deserved it 147

By Anonymous - 19/06/2012 03:33 - United States

Today, I was getting dirty with my boyfriend. It was the first time he had fingered anyone, and the only thing he said was, "It feels like the inside of my asshole." FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 455

You deserved it 4 640

No good

By :(( - 28/09/2013 21:24 - Australia - Brisbane

Today, I was all set to lose my virginity to my girlfriend. I was ecstatic, until she threatened to "beat the fuck" out of me if I didn't make it good for her. The actual sex was 30 seconds of me being given death glares, causing me to lose my boner, and have to leave in shame. FML

I agree, your life sucks 69 498

You deserved it 8 045

By Anonymous - 24/04/2013 18:56 - United States - Huntington Park

Today, I was making out with my girlfriend for the first time, and she reached down to feel me up. When her hands got there, she stopped and said, "You're not even hard..." I was. FML

I agree, your life sucks 82 506

You deserved it 9 871

diesel42o 0

Wednesday 2 March 2011 8:03

she owned u on that one

sam_stalker 0

Wednesday 2 March 2011 8:04

op she didn't think it was sexy, she did it for revenge >=~}

Comments

track69 3

Wednesday 2 March 2011 16:07

anal is gross. YDI

WildInTheStreets 5

Wednesday 2 March 2011 16:18

sketchy business.

geddy420 0

Wednesday 2 March 2011 16:19

your not the only one. haha

jellyfishdelight 0

Wednesday 2 March 2011 16:28

Kudos to your girl!

deidre823 7

Wednesday 2 March 2011 16:34

HAHA, bitch.

gmen25 0

Wednesday 2 March 2011 16:41

I think that's called rape lol

intheboot 0

Wednesday 2 March 2011 17:16

ouch. next time stick two fingers up her ass!

cmyk 19

Wednesday 2 March 2011 17:26

clearly he already surprised his gf with anal aka why she stated " now you know how it feels like" noone read that part?

xcarxcrashx 9

Wednesday 2 March 2011 17:29

Your girlfriend is awesome.

AbelAbel 1

Wednesday 2 March 2011 17:44

She said now you know what it feels like meaning, he probably gives her surprize buttsechs so YDI

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I agree, your life sucks 515

You deserved it 62

Today, the entire back room of Walmart smelled like cat piss. No one else complained, as they all claimed they couldn’t smell a thing under their masks. I, on the other hand, have a headache and nausea from the overpowering scent despite my mask. FML

I agree, your life sucks 907

You deserved it 145

Same thing different taste

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