Love Today, my boyfriend still won't get a job, because he's convinced... - FML

Anonymous - 24/02/2016 17:28 - United States

Today, my boyfriend still won't get a job, because he's convinced he's going to make millions inventing and selling carbonated ketchup. FML

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St. Patrick's Day: Shamrocks and Tribulations
Green anecdotes of jealousy, full of shamrocks and pints, for a memorable St. Patrick's Day! …

Anonymous - 10/04/2012 20:57 - United States - Muskegon

Today, my boyfriend decided that he didn't need a real job. He wants to sell pot for a living. Or hang drywall. He can't decide. FML

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Driving force

Anonymous - 08/04/2024 15:00 - United States - Ontario

Today, my boyfriend has been unemployed for over six months. He has applied EVERYWHERE with no luck, but he also has the opportunity to start his own business. Instead, he just spends his time sitting in front of the TV all day long. I'm starting to believe he is not a driven man, and I hate that. FML

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Don't know, don't care

All a hoax - 25/10/2020 20:05 - Netherlands - Utrecht

Today, my boss still won't believe in climate change, and won't do anything to reduce our carbon footprint. FML

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Bnewlove - 31/07/2013 04:50 - Canada - Surrey

Today, my boyfriend suggested that we become "drug dealers" because I'm a chemistry student and he's seen a few episodes of Breaking Bad. FML

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Anonymous - 09/12/2014 21:14 - United States - Margate City

Today, as I was leaving home for my mall kiosk job, my dad asked me where I was off to. When I said I was going to work, he tossed an empty beer bottle to the floor, belched, and said "Bah! Get a REAL job!" He's unemployed and living in my apartment. FML

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Ploeboi - 04/08/2010 08:28 - United States

Today, my boyfriend finally got a job. As a clown. FML

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Money money money

Alittlebitiffy - 26/04/2017 14:00

Today, my husband insists he'll be able to make a career out of playing League of Legends. He says this with only $4 in our bank account because of his last brilliant career move. FML

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lhazel - 17/09/2015 02:36 - United States - Mount Juliet

Today, my boyfriend and I were talking about what we want to be when we grow up. He said he wanted to be a bartender, and single. FML

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me - 02/03/2011 23:21 - United States

Today, my fiancé and I had a fight over household expenses. He's never had a job in his life, but this didn't stop him demanding that I get another full-time job to pay for video games and beer. FML

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Now hiring. Please.

Anonymous - 25/06/2021 11:01 - Canada

Today, my boyfriend's 16-year-old daughter got a job. I'm 29, have a Master’s degree in chemistry and I'm still unemployed. FML

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geekpower_fml 28

Thursday 25 February 2016 0:23

Maybe try talking him into getting a job so he can save money up from that to get a better loan for the ketchup thing? We both know it'll never happen but hey, whatever works.

dBLIZZARD 20

Thursday 25 February 2016 0:20

I'd buy that tbh

team_garra 8

Thursday 25 February 2016 3:09

Maybe he just needs a small loan of a million dollars

burnthistown 20

Thursday 25 February 2016 3:17

Well not anymore, thanks for the idea ?

FSGInsainity 15

Thursday 25 February 2016 3:21

I... I'd buy a bottle. It just seems so stupid you need to try it.

vikky538 28

Thursday 25 February 2016 4:06

Carbonated ketchup.. Seems interesting

nightstalker94 18

Thursday 25 February 2016 4:26

That's a good idea....you better ketchup with a better idea....no? Okay I'll let myself out

Steve97 32

Thursday 25 February 2016 4:35

Just dump the loser, it's not bloody rocket science...

OrganicSistah 17

Thursday 25 February 2016 4:46

Tell him he's going to need startup money.

suffermyname 15

Thursday 25 February 2016 4:47

He might actually be on to something....

geoh0400 14

Thursday 25 February 2016 4:52

Could I drink it?

opinionatedhuman 13

Thursday 25 February 2016 5:07

Now he's not, you just gave away his idea

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Miscellaneous Stalker My ex Coworkers Love Internet Relatable AITA Pokémon Awkward Work Kids Parenting Annoying Shopping Underwear Jealousy Parents Thief Intimacy Suspicious Sex Family NSFW Birthday Gifts I need your advice Accident Abuse Moving home

Today, I've been receiving a lot of calls from my telephone company, offering combo packages with internet, Netflix, Disney+ and whatever the fuck. We had previously resigned from their services, because the company never had the intention of fixing an outage that was caused BY THE SAME COMPANY. FML

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Today, I found out that yet another woman I was interested in is nothing but a addict. All the women I've tried to date for 3 years now have turned out to be fucked up in some major way. Why can't I just find a non-loser for a girlfriend? FML

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Today, I found out that my fiancé has been having sex with his sister while we've been together. I'm 5 months pregnant with his baby. They don't plan on stopping and talk everyday. FML

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Today, my car was in the shop so I borrowed my wife's VW Beetle convertible. It's really embarrassing because it's a girlie car and it's full of little stuffed animals. At a stop light a man asked me if I'd like to borrow one of his testicles because "every man should have at least one." FML

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Today, due to the cold, windy weather, I decided to wear my brand-new cute (and expensive) jacket that has a faux-fur hood. As I walked down the street, numerous PETA members attacked me with red liquid. I'm a Vegan and an animal-rights activist. FML

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Today, yet again, we have a fridge full of food, but my wife asked if we can order pizza in front of the kids, who all started jumping in excitement yelling, "PIZZA!" Now I can either say no and deal with pouting and tantrums, or waste money on crappy pizza. FML

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