Miscellaneous: Today, I was woken up by my own fart. FML - FML

By Wowsers. - 30/01/2010 08:47 - United Kingdom

Today, I was woken up by my own fart. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 818

You deserved it 36 019

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Same thing different taste

Drunk hookup ends with a… bang

By Anonymous - 14/10/2019 12:00

Today, I woke myself up by farting in my sleep, only to realize that the guy I'd brought home from the bar was still next to me. He was awake. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 495

You deserved it 559

Dinnertime

By u.p.i.c. - 02/08/2019 22:00 - United States - Los Angeles

Today, the smell of my own fart made me feel hungry. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 174

You deserved it 575

By The horror... - 11/11/2015 16:52 - United Kingdom - Luton

Today, I farted myself awake, in a car full of my boyfriend's family. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 397

You deserved it 3 175

By pootie - 11/12/2013 13:14 - United States - Miami

Today, I farted so loud that I woke myself up. And the stranger sitting next to me on the airplane. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 596

You deserved it 7 575

Alarm

By Anonymous - 09/08/2012 14:26 - United States

Today, my dog farted so loud in his sleep that he scared himself and woke up barking. This afternoon I achieved the same feat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 608

You deserved it 4 015

Rude awakening

By Anonymous - 08/04/2020 23:00

Today, I was woken up at 4 in the morning by my boyfriend farting on my leg and giggling in his sleep. For the third time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 563

You deserved it 261

By embarassed - 21/04/2011 03:24 - United States

Today, I fell asleep at a party. I farted so loud that I woke myself up. Everyone heard. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 365

You deserved it 12 954

Classic mistake

By Anonymous - 17/07/2021 15:01 - United States - Fargo

Today, I woke up from a dead sleep needing to fart. The second I tried to push it out, I realized it wasn't wasn't fart. FML

I agree, your life sucks 830

You deserved it 489

By pikachu - 20/01/2009 20:00 - United States

Today, my girlfriend farted in her sleep, woke me up because it was so damn loud, and my room smelt like rotten noodles for about an hour. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 604

You deserved it 4 551

Ouch!

By P0wned - 29/09/2009 21:21 - France

Today, in the middle of the night, I was punched in the face by my frightened girlfriend, who had just been awoken by her own fart. FML

I agree, your life sucks 71 993

You deserved it 5 276

Next

Top comments

SHAAAAAARK 1

Saturday 30 January 2010 16:10

Family Guy much?

Raina1122 0

Saturday 30 January 2010 16:10

WTF is wrong with that??!

Comments

Person1233 12

Saturday 30 January 2010 17:11

OP you're on the wrong site. When the fart gets you unemployed, then you can post here.

addictedtoitnow 0

Saturday 30 January 2010 17:12

I am wondering if my husband posted thi bc I woke up to his very LOUD fart this morning!!

epoh_fml 0

Saturday 30 January 2010 17:28

me too, OP! lmao

change_we_need_fml 0

Saturday 30 January 2010 17:38

okay. def not an fml.

X0WestyX0 0

Saturday 30 January 2010 17:51

ok idc if this is not really an FML its just ****** hailirous!!!!!!i also can't spell -_- lol XD

sohierocks 0

Saturday 30 January 2010 17:54

wow that is all im going to say.....actually not.....how in the world does that happen?! It must have been 1 big fart!!!!!!!!

sohierocks 0

Saturday 30 January 2010 17:56

wow...that is all im going to say...well actually not...how in the world does that happen???!!! That must have been 1 huge fart!!!!!!!!!!!

fuzz97 23

Saturday 30 January 2010 17:59

eat fewer beans then

TruleighSadistic 0

Saturday 30 January 2010 18:02

aww! dont feel to bad.. ive done it.. damn those yummy meals that make me gassy.. but i did it n woke up not only myself but my girlfriend who was lying next to me.. thankfully she thought it was cute

9010649 3

Saturday 30 January 2010 18:05

more like an MLIA...

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The Top

The Top

Today, I would like to thank the program designer that put "Set as home page" directly under "Remove from history". FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 106

You deserved it 11 406

Today, I got the wristbands in the mail for a music festival in a month and a half. This is my first time going to an event like this and I got overzealous and put it on. Now it's locked tightly on my wrist. I checked online after and it said not to put it on before you arrive at the event. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 693

You deserved it 14 530

Today, I’m in China for work. All my work is stored in my Google Drive, directly via the internet. It’s just a pity that Google is banned in China. FML

I agree, your life sucks 809

You deserved it 219

Today, while trying some new kinky things with my boyfriend, he cried out, "Call me Jesus!" Yeah... I think we're done with that. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 173

You deserved it 4 562

Today, I decided to make a place in my house for my friends to sign called “The Friend Wall." By sign I meant sign, not draw body parts. This afternoon I ate lunch next to a basketball-sized vagina and a monumentally large blue and purple penis. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 796

You deserved it 60 452

Today, my boyfriend renewed his driver's license and showed me the picture. I told him he needed to go back because they'd put the wrong birthdate. Turns out the idiot forgot he’s been lying to me about his age the whole time we’ve been together. He’s not actually 30. He’ll be 43 in two months. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 812

You deserved it 510