Animals: Today, I learned that my daughter's gerbils are not afraid of...

By corasmom - 27/07/2011 18:09 - United States

Today, I learned that my daughter's gerbils are not afraid of the vacuum cleaner. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 881

You deserved it 10 551

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Same thing different taste

By baldspot - 02/04/2012 05:38 - Australia

Today, my daughter decided to wake me up by putting the vacuum in my hair and turning it on. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 996

You deserved it 2 889

RIP Tiddles

By gvmfvr - This FML is from back in 2014 but it's good stuff - France - Fontenay-sous-bois

Today, my little sister was in charge of doing the vacuuming, when she decided our hamster had "dust on his back". FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 598

You deserved it 4 011

Irrational fears

By emelie000 - 29/07/2022 14:00

Today, my daughter, who can pick up spiders and even snakes without flinching, screamed at the top of her lungs because she saw a mouse. Um, what? FML

I agree, your life sucks 660

You deserved it 210

By Slaanesh - 12/12/2008 12:08 - France

Today, I decided to teach my dog not to be scared of the vacuum cleaner. I grab the handle and get it close to her. She runs off and hides behind the couch and pisses everywhere. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 048

You deserved it 39 019

By Jukka - 19/04/2011 00:48

Today, I watched Free Willy with my daughter. Later on she decided to free her 6 pet mice into the house. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 778

You deserved it 8 461

Poor little guy

By Anonymous - 04/03/2021 14:01

Today, I showed my family my new pet hamster. At the sight of him, my grandmother, who I had no idea hated rodents, let out a loud screech, causing my usually docile hamster to bite me and piss in my cupped hand. FML

I agree, your life sucks 945

You deserved it 175

By ohgosh - 12/10/2009 05:27 - Canada

Today, my son lost his pet rat, Charlie. Whilst vacuuming under my couch, the vacuum suddenly shut off. Something was stuck in it, so I took it apart. Something was inside, so I leaned in closer to get a better look. Bad news? I need a new vacuum. Good news? I found Charlie. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 710

You deserved it 4 595

By broomrape - 29/04/2009 04:52 - United States

Today, I found out that the horrible stench haunting my apartment for the past week was the decomposing corpse of my freedom loving gerbil underneath the bed that I've been sleeping on. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 166

You deserved it 11 688

By JustLeaveThem - 25/01/2017 18:00

Today, I was reaching into the floor vent in my toddler's room to retrieve some toys she'd dropped. What I found instead was a clump of large dead spiders. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 752

You deserved it 300

Leftovers

By Anonymous - 20/03/2023 18:00 - United States

Today, my daughter brought home her class hamster for the weekend. It escaped and we spent hours searching for it. We later found it in the fridge, eating our leftover pizza. I never knew hamsters had such a refined palate. FML

I agree, your life sucks 847

You deserved it 181

DianaFromHolland 3

Thursday 28 July 2011 0:06

Ffffuuuu what have u done? ;o

werx 6

Thursday 28 July 2011 2:29

Why weren't they in their cage?

Comments

cheesepie08 0

Thursday 28 July 2011 20:58

loooooool

Calyx_fml 21

Thursday 28 July 2011 22:30

The only thing they like better is richard gere's ass.

bloopster 2

Thursday 28 July 2011 23:18

Why were you vacuuming the gerbil cage in the first place?!

bankrupt 15

Friday 29 July 2011 1:55

Ha No 15, that's exactly what I was thinking but you beat me to it!

lifesosux 0

Friday 29 July 2011 3:55

to number 71- take a joke u frikken prick

daltyboy 0

Friday 29 July 2011 5:51

now they r

daltyboy 0

Friday 29 July 2011 5:53

71 u will never get fuked in ur life.... its nature

hotpinkpepsi 6

Friday 29 July 2011 7:23

lmao haha fyl

justbigbs 6

Friday 29 July 2011 14:37

are they still alive????

jenno740 0

Friday 29 July 2011 15:33

I acctually lol'd at this!

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The Top

Today, my boyfriend asked me to marry him by handing me a ring and telling me, "Okay we're engaged now." I should have seen it coming when we started dating, I went to his house one night and as I was leaving he said, "Okay you're my girlfriend now." FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 349

You deserved it 17 174

Today, while I was playing football with a friend, my sister wanted to join in. She was messing around with the ball at the start, then suddenly she kicked the ball through my legs, pulled my shorts down and kneed me in the nuts. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 558

You deserved it 221

Today, I’m a bus driver in Paris. A guy got on with a sheep. I told him that you can’t take the bus with animals that can’t fit on your lap. He then hoisted it onto his lap, while the sheep stared at me, baaing loudly. FML

I agree, your life sucks 756

You deserved it 123

Today, I learned how my coworkers differentiate between my coworker and me as we have the same name, when I overheard one of them ask the other, "Which one, ugly Leslie or hot Leslie?" When the answer was "ugly Leslie," he walked straight to me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 525

You deserved it 1 878

Today, I realised that my body has its own masturbation cycle; while I was out shopping, I heard the intro music to my room-mate's favourite video game, and popped an uncontrollable boner. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 314

You deserved it 5 782

Today, my older sister dragged us to a restaurant that charged us $80 a piece for 8 mouthfuls of food. She does this all the time. When our youngest sister defended her, it removed all doubt that our parents still pay her bills. FML

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You deserved it 148