Animals: Today, I gave my wife a cat. The first thing it did when it got... - FML

By prevostsrocklike - 11/05/2009 12:38 - United States

Today, I gave my wife a cat. The first thing it did when it got out of the box was scratch the sh*t out of my leg. Next, it ran up to my wife and purred. She said, "Good cat." FML

I agree, your life sucks 534

You deserved it 84

Back to school: Courses and confusion
When the campus comes back to life, anecdotes abound between the lecture halls and student parties! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Top comments

NorfolkDude 2

Monday 11 May 2009 20:36

That cat was all like, "Don't ever put me in a box again, ****er." Then it ran up to your wife's leg and was all like, "Pet me, *****." Then it was looking at you and was like, "Yeah, ***hole, what now?" Are you going to take that kind of abuse? I guess so.

justdance45 0

Monday 11 May 2009 20:34

LOL such a loving wife. FYL

Comments

MegamiKaosu 28

Tuesday 12 April 2011 21:02

You now have a replacement :3

namesarehardtoth 0

Wednesday 8 June 2011 22:53

cat is winning

MegNGreg 0

Sunday 24 July 2011 6:26

great wife u got ther. :/

mastersmurf 13

Monday 15 August 2011 13:59

At least she likes your gift.

bieberfreak18 0

Monday 5 December 2011 3:13

I don't think cats are to be kept in boxes...

ciarabear 0

Tuesday 2 October 2012 7:24

Hahaha oh my, I want that cat Hahaha funny!

jutyjaty 9

Monday 22 April 2013 6:03

Maybe you shouldn't have put it in a ****** box.

DontSaveMe 16

Sunday 4 August 2013 13:08

Don't put the cat in a BOX! Unless it was a proper cage-box. If not, YDI, poor CAT!

chrisstachon 30

Saturday 5 October 2013 7:33

that's why you get a mans best friend

TBfml15 9

Wednesday 17 December 2014 6:19

You shouldn't have given her the pussy

11
12
13
14
15

FML on Facebook

Keywords

Coworkers Weird Singing Work Embarrassing Motorbike Noise Transportation Scams Love First Dates Friends Cheating Cars Mental health Suspicious Miscellaneous Anxiety Students Ironic NSFW Intimacy Tinder Dating Facebook Awkward Dogs Accident My ex Confused

The Top

Today, I finally had the best sex I've ever had with this really hot guy I've been hanging out with lately. I thought everything was all well and good until he turned to me and said, "You know, your orgasm face kinda reminds me of Steve Martin, but in a good way." FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 315

You deserved it 8 550

Today, I was taking a bath and out of boredom started making sheep noises. I then had a conversation with myself in farm animal noises. When I got out of the bath, I walked to my bedroom in my towel, passing the living room… where my little brother's soccer team burst out laughing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 056

You deserved it 75 624

Random

Today, I’ve been married for seven years and am the mother of a little boy. My pregnant neighbor came to see me for name ideas for her own son that would go well with my son’s name, because “between half-brothers, it’s important”. FML

I agree, your life sucks 953

You deserved it 61

Today, I decided to break up with my boyfriend. The main reason being that he doesn't value my time, and fails to see how canceling at the last minute is rude and a major inconvenience. I wanted to be respectful enough by breaking things off face to face. He cancelled, at the last minute. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 882

You deserved it 2 642

Today, after frantically searching my house and office and calling every place I'd visited in the last 24 hours, I finally found my phone in my fridge. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 864

You deserved it 6 851

Today, my boss held a staff meeting to talk about how the Covid-19 pandemic has made us stronger, that all of us are family. Later, my car broke down after work, she drove by, saw me stranded on the road and we made eye contact. I thought she was going to help me, but she drove right on by. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 984

You deserved it 145

Today, the woman I am absolutely in love with will only be my friend. I wish I could get her to understand how much it hurts to see her with boyfriends, and only be friends. I'm starting to feel like I can't maintain this friendship because it hurts so much. I don't know what to do. FML

I agree, your life sucks 154

You deserved it 842

Today, my boyfriend and I were having spontaneous sex on the sofa when he suddenly pulled out and sat back down, boner waving like a flagpole, because half time was over on the football and he hadn’t thought the sex would take so long. Let's see if he ever gets sex again, tosser. FML

I agree, your life sucks 398

You deserved it 138