Love: Today, I farted while asking a girl out to dinner. FML

By fart - 27/11/2014 15:13 - United States - Houghton Lake

Today, I farted while asking a girl out to dinner. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 127

You deserved it 7 292

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Same thing different taste

My body hates me

By HappilyNeverAfter - 18/09/2014 03:14 - Canada - Port Perry

Today, a guy asked me out, and I felt butterflies in my stomach. I soon realized that it wasn't butterflies, but an unexpected bowel movement. I stood there awkwardly, looking him in the eyes, then farted hard. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 858

You deserved it 5 293

By Anonymous - 26/10/2012 07:23 - Australia - Queanbeyan

Today, I went out to a restaurant with a girl I have been dating. The only conversation was about how proud she was of her fart during work earlier, and how she managed to clear out a section of the office. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 931

You deserved it 3 240

By tmac05 - 13/11/2010 05:13 - United States

Today, the waiter farted while I was on a date. My date thought it was me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 854

You deserved it 3 016

Nervous

By amelie - 09/12/2018 05:00

Today, my boyfriend proposed to me. While getting down on one knee, he farted. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 740

You deserved it 719

By nameless - 12/07/2009 06:45 - United States

Today, I asked the girl I am in love with out on a date. She asked me for my name. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 295

You deserved it 11 883

By Anonymous - 01/03/2018 19:30 - United States - Greenville

Today, while wearing a sexy pair of undies for my partner and taking him out on a nice dinner, I trusted a fart walking from the car to the restaurant and shit myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 058

You deserved it 1 756

By oops - 04/03/2016 21:28 - United States - Mankato

Today, I accidentally farted while shopping. There was an awkward silence followed by a god-awful stink and a lady's little girl bursting into tears. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 066

You deserved it 3 430

By oops - 18/05/2009 04:17 - United States

Today, while I was waitressing, I bent down to pick up a menu and accidentally farted, really loud, at my table. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 514

You deserved it 10 831

Bad timing, dude

By Anonymous - 24/02/2021 07:59 - Australia

Today, in the middle of asking my girlfriend to marry me, I sneezed so hard that I farted. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 030

You deserved it 153

By Anonymous - 13/08/2015 01:18 - United States - Kingman

Today, I let out a huge fart during a job interview. I was the one conducting the interview. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 430

You deserved it 5 208

ComoEsJuan 24

Thursday 27 November 2014 18:16

Breaking the ice by breaking wind. I'll take notes.

fuckyourlifeOP 25

Thursday 27 November 2014 18:16

That stinks!

Comments

PSYqualiac 17

Friday 28 November 2014 20:16

It's fart privately before, let yourself air out, fart again after she's said yes and walked away or right when she says no... then blame it on her.

maddieray26 8

Saturday 29 November 2014 5:01

Because, I'm so fancy.

SaintJohnny 2

Saturday 29 November 2014 10:23

did she fart back in response for a yes??

Fonsecac 11

Saturday 29 November 2014 17:28

Enough said haha

mollysantan01 5

Sunday 30 November 2014 6:10

Damn, what did the girl say??

MAXINEEE 4

Sunday 30 November 2014 6:47

It's ok... I took a huge dump In a restaurant with my boyfriend once. He still doesn't know

demonfacee 14

Tuesday 2 December 2014 4:30

Everybody farts. Some people just can't admit that.

Lefty_Guns 16

Friday 5 December 2014 14:20

He's just a smooth operatooor... youtu.be/4TYv2PhG89A?t=1m13s

briafly27 4

Tuesday 9 December 2014 21:35

A guy burped twice while asking me out. I felt so bad for him, I went even though I wasn't at all interested.

Domonator 16

Thursday 11 December 2014 0:13

Proper sphincter control is required for successful dating.

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The Top

Today, after two and half years at my company and after recently being promoted, I was told by my boss the business doesn't feel it needs me, and invited me to find another job. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 858

You deserved it 137

Today, I finally got the courage to tell my parents that I'm gay. My mom said "Yeah, we know." When I asked how they knew, my dad, without looking up from the tv, said, "We've been monitoring your Internet history." FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 673

You deserved it 17 090

Today, I met up with my ex-girlfriend for coffee. It’s been months, and I was planning on flexing on her with my new car. Turns out, she also got a new car, and it’s newer, cleaner, faster, and better on gas. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 113

You deserved it 3 651

Today, my sister made a comment about my small boobs. I told her I'm actually a C cup, and she told me she "can't even C them". I just got roasted with a fucking pun. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 720

You deserved it 1 338

Today, I went with the kids I work with to a roller rink, where there are tons of black lights. Under the glow, I realized in horror that an old semen stain could be seen on my shorts. Praying no one saw, or realized what it was. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 703

You deserved it 3 599

Today, my friend and I got really drunk at the holiday staff party. When I went to work afterwards, everyone gave me the death stare. Apparently, I got so drunk that I flashed my boss's 13-year-old son. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 314

You deserved it 50 423

Same thing different taste

My body hates me

Nervous

Bad timing, dude

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