Sex, Parents Intimacy Let me in - FML

Let me in

miley098 - 02/11/2011 16:37 - United Kingdom

Today, I came home from school, only to find I was locked out. The cars were all there, but no one was in. It wasn't until I heard continuous banging from my parents' window that it clicked. They kept me locked me for over an hour in freezing weather just to have sex. FML

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Chinese New Year: Dragons and Laughter
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Anonymous - 15/04/2016 19:46 - United States - Bronx

Today, I got locked in my boyfriend's garage in my underwear while his parents ripped him a new one for having sex beneath their roof. His sister had to let me out. FML

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something - 16/02/2019 18:00

Today, I was walking home from school and my stupid brother who comes earlier then me locked the storm door. I ended up trying every other door for 3 hours in below freezing temperature. I was numb everywhere. I rang the bell and my brother opened it. He was home the whole time. FML

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Grounded

cock sauce - 09/06/2012 21:15 - Switzerland - Luzern

Today, I snuck out of the house for a night on the town. When I got back, I found all the doors and windows bolted shut. My sister's laughing face at my bedroom window suggests I'll be spending the rest of the night outside. FML

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Long walk home

zoe - 15/07/2022 22:00

Today, I got locked out of a building that I work in (I work night shifts). I locked my phone, wallet, and car keys in the building. I had no way of contacting my boss or getting a ride. I had to walk home at night, almost got hit by a car full of dudes yelling slurs, and had a woman scream at me from the passenger seat of a car. FML

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Stuck on you

Eeeek - 26/08/2010 21:17 - Bulgaria

Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex in a rarely used room at school. We got carried away and found ourselves locked in. We slept there overnight. We woke up when the cleaning lady found us the next morning and were greeted by worried parents and school staff. FML

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killmenow - 23/04/2014 14:54 - United States - New Orleans

Today, I locked myself out of my dorm room. I walked across campus, shoe-less and in nothing but my bathrobe, to find someone who could let me back in. Turns out I hadn't even shut the door properly and so it never actually locked. I can still hear the guy laughing at me. FML

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The key

Anonymous - 07/09/2009 21:20 - United States

Today, I ran into my parents' bedroom after I heard my name and what sounded like painful screams. When I opened the door, my parents were on top of each other, laughing hysterically. They needed me to find the key to the handcuffs. FML

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Sky - 25/07/2018 01:30

Today, since my parents always told me that I was welcome to come home whenever I want or need, I decided to stop by. They'd changed the locks and wouldn't let me in. FML

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TheComputerGuy96 - 22/05/2010 07:56 - Italy

Today, I was locked out of my house. After hours of trying to break the door, I found out I accidentally left a window open. The door, however, still needs to be replaced. FML

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Anonymous - 28/02/2015 03:20 - United States - Auburn

Today, I fell in the shower and the doors jammed shut. I was stuck in there for hours, waiting for my parents to come home. They had to open the door for me while I was still naked inside. FML

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EvilPotato 14

Wednesday 2 November 2011 22:19

Sex is way better than kids :P you've been overruled.

Aaronftw 0

Wednesday 2 November 2011 22:20

Sometimes you just gotta take one for team

devkar 0

Thursday 3 November 2011 2:00

It's what keeps parents togetherr.

FrankHotpants 31

Thursday 3 November 2011 2:04

This will keep your parents from having to post an FML of their own about how you walked in on their role playing day.

BlazingFire 4

Thursday 3 November 2011 2:34

Call the police and say you think there is a robbery and watch them kick the door down. Then see what your parents face looks like.

someone235 0

Thursday 3 November 2011 2:37

sex is what made you so u should be happy

MelCristian55 0

Thursday 3 November 2011 3:23

Haha ! Sounds good to me!!

_moden_ 6

Thursday 3 November 2011 3:27

Would you rather have been inside?

mle015 0

Thursday 3 November 2011 3:51

Get a key

MoonPhase123 4

Thursday 3 November 2011 4:01

That sucks :/

Okayitwasme 0

Thursday 3 November 2011 4:16

Ya, you are now traumatized for life. You can not take back what you heard! To top it off you froze!

4realz226 0

Thursday 3 November 2011 4:46

Akward...*runs away*

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Miscellaneous Stalker My ex Coworkers Love Internet Relatable AITA Pokémon Awkward Work Parenting Kids Annoying Shopping Underwear Jealousy Parents Thief Suspicious Sex Intimacy Family NSFW Birthday Gifts I need your advice Accident Abuse Moving home

Today, whilst laying in bed with my girlfriend, she received a flirty message from her ex on her phone asking if she wanted to go to the cinema. She replied, knowing I could see the screen. The messages were signed with a love heart and about 15 kisses. She claims they are still just friends. FML

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Today, I moved into my first house and realised pretty quick that my estate agent lied to me about how great this neighbourhood was. I was in the house for 30 minutes when I heard the neighbours having a screaming domestic in their garden, then a brick flew over the fence and broke my eye socket. FML

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Today, I had a low blood sugar attack and almost passed out during class while over Zoom, which my professor then decided to bring attention to by calling me out for "sighing" about the research paper. FML

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Today, I found out what sound a hammer makes when it strikes the back of my hand. FML

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Today, my long time girlfriend flew across the country to visit. My asshat roommate decided to introduce himself to her while I was in the bathroom. She left and won't answer my calls. He won't tell me what he said to her. FML

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Today, I was walking down the street when a police officer started walking behind me with his dog. I sped up and tried to cross the road. He took this as suspicious and got the dog to take me to the floor. I've been afraid of dogs since I was 5. FML

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