Makes you want to stop trying huh

Looking at it from a psychology standpoint, most likely he is cheating.

OP, your husband is probably cheating on you. A common tactic for cheaters is to accuse their spouse of cheating.

Maybe try to be more spontaneous more often???

What kind of paranoid psyho did you marry

Next time, maybe with another husband, just get a leather office chair, sit, wait for him to come home and then just do the "I've been waiting for you." thing.

From experience, usually when someone accuses you of cheating that means they are cheating. It's happened to me. My friend. And a guy friend. Shitty thing to do. But it's the first sign.

it means he's cheating on you

there has to be a reason he doesn't trust you. did you do something in the past? that, or he's cheating. cheaters ate often suspicious of their partners. guilty conscience and all.

Insecurity much?? If you've never given him reason not to trust you, I'd be wondering why he's freaking out. Planning a special date for him shouldn't cause that kind of reaction unless... Is he cheating on you?